I just wanna cry my heads out.

I found out, its not becos you're tired of everything at that moment. You wasn't. You flare up it was becos you knew you had someone there for you, for sure, even you lose me. You found a new replacement. You found someone you can give your love more. You found someone you can give your time more. You found someone you can treasure more. You found someone, new, different from me, & you find her very unique. & that person there is making you turn to the other direction & thats why, we're like that. Just admit it that, you wasn't tired, you did it just becos you didn't want me anymore.

For that moment last night, at 12plus, i found out loads of stuffs that made me feel total 100% angry at that period of time. I wasn't feeling any sadness, not even 0.000000000001%. Afterwards, i felt bitterish in my heart & many questions start to revolve around my mind. Suddenly, i just said this. "I feel bitter. Why?" However, i did not put my brain into the situation & think about it. All i do was to distract myself with various stuffs. & at that moment again, i was just so strong that i thought i could just let go of it & live my life like how it is. & the next day, i realise, i can't. I'm still living my life in the past, & its hard for myself to step out from the past & live in the present. It just seems like you have to jump over a river with many crocodiles. It applies to me too, i need a lot of support & courage so i am able to step out of the box I'm still thinking & living. & if once i step out of the box, it will be the biggest step i made in life, & i will feel so accomplished.

I saw a lot of stuffs whenever i surf the net. Be it blogs, facebook, tumblr, msn & etc. I will see a lot of unwanted stuffs that after i see it, i HOPE i never saw it. Becos when i see it, i don't feel good at all. I feel angry & of course, sad. Have you ever go through when you're sad & angry, you cannot do anything? Not even throwing pillows, not even eating ice-cream or junks just to make yourself feel better? You could just only stay calm, & feel all those emotions in your heart, & not anywhere else. Its really hard to just stuff everything in your heart. As for my heart, it is just a very tiny balloon. When the little balloon is filled with air, & you, trying to pump more air in, air will be compressed & at that moment, the little balloon can still take it. However, if you continue pumping air into the balloon, it will just burst. My heart is just like the little balloon. I can keep everything in my heart, but if i come across more stuffs to keep things in my heart, i will burst & breakdown. You will see me crying so badly. Thats the moment when i'm hurt, deeply.

I guess, i still have to live my life, without you. You're just a experience that i have to to through in my life. & maybe, the experience is just a benifit to me. Letting you go, maybe there's a lot of good things gonna happen in my life? I shouldn't even bother if you're with her a not, i shouldn't even FEEL anything about it. I SHOULDN'T.

Once again, enough of all those sad stories. :)
Yesterday, can be said as AWESOME. Hahah, i'll rate it 8/10. Firstly, my alram kept ringing but i thought it was some music! Hahah, it was kinda funny though. Prepared & left house. Once again, I'm late & Amanda is early, or maybe to be good, ON TIME. Hahah. Ate pepper lunch, woooo. Hahaha, Jolene came late becos she had to go to her grandma's house. & before that she sms me saying that she will be a little late. So i was like, a little only. If its more than little, i'll kiss her. Look at her mean reply. :/


Talked a little, & left. Went to library, ahhh, so many people. So they decided, once again, to come to my house. Hahah, i went out for like fun plus i wear until so nice! :X Haha, kidding la. :) & i didn't study a single shit. Sigh, howhowhow.

I wearing my husband clothes. Hahah, & i told them i look like i just had sex! HAHAHA.

Then went down to the swimming pool to take photos. Hahah, Jill was just literally blur. She just stood there becos got water. :S LOL. So she didn't manage to take photos with us.

Jolene's spasm face! Becos of the sun. Hahah.

Amanda Baby Pie. :D

Jolene laughing ass! Hahah.

I LOVE AMANDAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. :D


Amanda asked me to do some Lucifer stuffs. Haha, i turned out a bit... WEIRD...

I found out Amanda like to hold my hand! Hahah. xD
After that, went up, ORDERED PIZZAHUT! HAHAHA, OMG, I THINK I GREW 5KG LOH. :( So sad. I need to on diet. Like seriouslyyyyyy.


Then we studied a little, we decided to go City Plaza! LOLLOL. OMGGGGGGG. I WENT TO SHOP. WOOOO. Love it love it love it. But i only bought a shoe! $32. Kill me for spending money. :/ Oh, i wore my husband's clothes out. & everyone is telling me,"Jaime, you look like you not wearing anything eh! & can you pull down your FBT?! You look like you wearing underwear." Hahaha, & as for my character, i didn't bother. I just walked out like nobody business. :) Xiaoqing meet me at City Plaza. AHHHHHHHHH. MISS HER MISS HER! :D

There's this lady gave us lollipop. Say she have a lot. Beginning its nice. Eat too long, too sweet. But for me, its ok. Hahaha.

Look at me, do i look like i just had sex? :D While walking Amanda say Jolene & Me is the mean one. Then my sister was like,"Jolene Min what. Of course mean la.'' lol, i swear its fucking lame!
Went home, Jolene & Amanda left. Xiaoqing took poloraids. Hahah.


Then she wants to drink bubbletea. Me, being so nice, i went with her all the way to Parkway just to buy bubbletea. Hahah. Then had dinner, everyone didn't have the mood to eat anymoreeee becos of the bubbletea. It was just really damn fillinng. Hahah. Watched tv then have to go down burn paper for the last day of Ghost Festival. HAHAHA, LAST DAY. OH YEAH. :) Then showered. Noreen came! AHHH, MY BAOBEO DARL! She showered, then we all went crazy. TOOK PHOTOS. :)






Then we was surfing net, walao eh, argh, pissed. But nvm. We decided to cook instant noodles. :) Hahaha! SO WE COOK.


Hahah, sister stole some. :) Then she wanna take photo with us.

Eat finish, its time to wash up! :D

Sister took this. THEN WE I TOOK PHOTO OF MY BED. :D




Then we was laughing so badly, stacking each other. We slept at like 3plus. I swear Noreen very hard to sleep with!!!!!!!! Becos we on the fan & also turn the air-con to 16degree. Hahah, she was freezing. I slept in the middle. So Noreen moved to me so not that cold, i didn't have space i move. Then Noreen move! OMGGGG. Then i wake up, i look. Xiaoqing is falling off the bed. I said,"Noreen ah, move there." Noreen say back,"VERY COLD!!!!" Hahah, halfway through, we off the air con. Lol, was literally turning to ice cubes! :( Woke up at like 11plus. Showered, eat lunch & rushed to school.

Choir was mainly theory. Tell us how to sing better & etc. Was so sleepy. :/ Couldn't stand properly, keep wanting to just fall off.

Choir end at 4, then had Math. Went to classroom, go through surds. :D Hahah, I GOT ALL THE ANSWER. Mr Pang told me NOT BAD AH. HAHAHA YAY. WAS SO HAPPYYYYYYYYYYYY. Afterwards, Mr Pang talked to me till like quite long. Reached home, eat dinner. I IMMEDIATELY SLEPT FROM 7-10. I'm just too tired that i breakdown. Really. Just have too much things to handle, this year. Sigh.

Alright, shall end here. BYE. :) More photos in facebook!

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Afflin Amanda AnneTan Arnee Beverly Denise Eileen Farisah Fiona Genevieve Geraldine Huixian Irene JingYi. JoleneSEAH Kaijun KayXi KC choir LindaLIM Linda Melissa Nadia Natalie Ng Ying NicoleCHAN Noreen RyanPoon SandraYEO Sheryl Sharon Shearin SoniaCHEW Tiffany VenusTan Venus VictoriaAnne Xiao qing XingWen Yun Hsiu Yuliyanti

• Bye. :/
• I can stand up with my two feets now. :)
• Avoiding.
• Mummy, it's over.
• Liar liar pants on fire.
• I shall forget the love you've given me, becos you...
• Omg.
• Whatever.
• Accepting emotions.
• The another day.

Jaime!