YOU'VE NEVER BEEN A BURDEN TO ME DEAR. I LOVE YOU, WHY WOULD YOU BE A BURDEN?

It sucks to be sick. Especially, when it comes with a flu, sore throat & a cough, like how it's happening to me. My voice changed to the max, very sexy, & i love it. & midnight when you're in your deep sleep, you just suddenly cough becos your throat irritates you & you cough so badly till you start to tear, spasm of vomiting, sweat furiously & you can't sleep back. & having a flu, makes you breathless. My health, without having a flu, i am already breathless due to some reasons, add on to flu, i can just die due to lack of oxygen. Sore throat sucks becos when you swallow something, it will just hurt, ttm. & a fever?! Makes me looks like a zombie. -.- Becos when i have a fever, i just wanna die. Hahah. & its sucks the most to get sick when the person you want to care about you so much isn't there caring & bringing you to see the doctor. :) Thats the worse thing. Please go & get that experience.

Today something stupid happened to Noreen. She somehow fell down the stairs. Jill, Sonia, Tifflin & me started laughing not knowing she was crying. However, when i know she's crying, i'm still laughing becos Noreen & i always talk about "What if i fall?". Thats why i started laughing so badly that everyone pushed me to the side & laugh first. Lol! Noreen, i didn't mean it alright. :) I love you. Hahah, but its just so funny. Noreen somehow sprained her ankle or something. However, she started laughing too when she was crying so badly. Funny only.

I know I'm nothing to you, i know everything. I don't even mean a single shit to you now. As least, we're still friends right? At least, please acknowledge me. We've been friends for 2years. We've been bestest bestest friend that almost everyone in the school know. Yes, now we're over, but at least, acknowledge me. You don't have to be scared when you see me seeing you & her together. Becos that really don't matter to me anymore. We've been normal friends now. A normal friend that just says "Hi" & "Bye" to each other when we see other. & i chose being a normal friend then being strangers. Becos... You just have to think back the pass two years. You've been there for me, you've loved me, you've cared for me, you've been with me & many more. We can always continue being friends, than being a stranger. These few days, I've thought if we should start a new friendship or just a normal friendship. I asked you yesterday, & if you want a new friendship, you would have at least notice me. But you just didn't care. So i ASSUME you just wanna be normal friends.

I think i am just getting over it. I am accepting it. I am just letting go of the matter. Becos I'm just too tired. You're tired. Everyone's tired. Ha. Since the three of us, none of us wanna give in one step, i SHALL give in. :) I have my own life to go too, i cannot always cling onto this & not continue carrying on with it. I've been just too silly. Really, for the past two months, for the past few days.

However, i have to confess something. I really don't want us to be normal friends, i don't even want to end it & I really don't like what i seen today. When i saw both of you together walking out the school gate together, guess what i do. Despite of the fever, despite of the knee hurting, i ran up & look at both of you walking. I realised... a lot a lot of stuffs. Its just too much to be written, its just too much that i don't bother typing out letters by letters. Becos of what i see, i got real angry, not feeling anything else. Just plain angry. Also, becos of what i see, i decided to let go. & by letting go of it, its once again, becos of you. I don't know why am i doing stuffs, becos of you. I'm just used to it already. Letting it go, you may be even happier. You may not be so stressed out. You may not be pressurized every single day. You don't have to be scared of anything! Doing all this, i've never thought for myself. Not a single shit about myself. All i think is, you you you you you. How great can i be? But i still suck, i still lost to her. Becos i'm just too mentally weak & i really cannot undergo all this again.

Haha, sometimes i am just really thickskin. & for don't know how many times, i gonna be thickskin. :) Hmm~ I just wonder how great i am sometimes. I wonder if she can ever win me in that. I don't think so though? I let you wipe your face, your sweat & your tears with my blouse. I don't complain as long as you're feeling better. I wonder if she can ever come out with a last minute song just to cheer you up. I wonder how long can she last with you telling her how pain it is, & etc. I wonder if she can ever sacrifice so many stuffs even though its a disadvantage to her. I wonder loads of stuffs. She may have different ways to handle these stuffs, but i still dare to say, she can never be as good as me. :) If she is trying to do all these to be like me, ha, its all fake man. :) Trust me. I don't know if she will ever comment about what i write, but... I'm just saying whatever that is coming out from my heart.

In class(Jill, Sonia, Tifflin, Noreen & me) really got into like a situation that we just wanna scold some people.


All these words, i've never seen it before. & seriously, i don't know what the hell does it mean. I don't think quite a lot of people know the meaning. Its like omg, why are you using this languages?! All these languages its for like typical ahlian la?


There's something i still cannot figure out. Which is. You tell me, you want to be with your friends. Ya, ok? Then why are you sticking to her..? Like, okay? She's the friendS when there's like only ONE human being? If you just don't want me, you want her, you can just tell me you know. You don't have to come out with all those excuses just to let me walk away from you. I don't need lies, i need the truth.

& one thing i am still angry over is.. She is talking about me lah. Yet, you believer her friend that she's not talking about me. WHAT?! I've not said anything for the past few months even though she said me, i kept quiet. Until she keep continue on with it, I HAVE MY LIMITS, of course i say. & me keeping quiet, i got a scolding instead of a praise. She got protected instead a scolding. WHAT LOGIC IS THIS.

I just deleted one whole bunch of word. Ha.

You said you dont wanna break either of our heart. However, you managed to protect one, & broke the other. Ha.



This post means: Let's just be best friend from the start. Now, i only your reply.

For now, lets look back & remember the memories for the last time. :)

The frog factory & many many factories we went. That period of time, we was so awkward to take photos. Now, we can just take unglamly. :)

This was the time before Mid-Autumn Festival last year. We suddenly went high & get all different stuffs & put on us. Even bra. Just look like how cool we are. :)

KC Family day. In the mornining we just started to took photos. & thats all we do. & afterwards, we still rushed to tuition. Haha.

We're suppose to study in library. But remember we ended up playing spider boxing? Then we saw the swing opposite the library, we went to play with it.

We played with plasters. Becos of my house chopstick, you scratched your forehead & i started laughing. So we came out with the idea, putting plasters on the forehead. & also the neck for fun!

Took photos just becos we had the mood too.

All those poloriads. We played with shower cap becos you find it cool. Remember the ice cream biscuit? :) We bought 5boxes & ate all.

E Awards! we bought shades from Rubi. & i asked you to wear it despite its night time just to take photo.

Before bowling, we went to my house & took photos with our cool watch! Haha.

The surprise party, was awesome. Very awesome. The best birthday gift you've given me, Staying over at my house for two days & many things happen. Its unforgettable.

Work attachment. ZOO. AHHHH, it was tiring. But after seeing you, i got more energy.

Tuition time, we can just take photos randomly. :)

The lastest photo we took. It will be the last photo before the new friendship start. :) Loves.

I didn't eat dinner, oh yay. On diet. :)

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