Onew, i love you. :D

Awesome-ness around me

2011-11-01T00:12:00.003+08:00

These few days my days have been awesome!

Last Wednesday, went out with Tifflin, Noreen & my sister. We went to Girlhairdo to get some wigs. Yes, wigs! I tried several wigs & found one that is the best for me. I didn't want to get the whole wig, but i only want to buy half wig. I got a curly one & i love it although it cost me $59.90.

Outfit of the day! Couldn't really take a nice one becos of my sister, hahahah.

While waiting for Noreen, i start snapping photos! Especially with my sister, but all the photos are with her. :/

Finally Noreen is here, we headed off to the MRT!

Reached City Hall & my dear Tifflin is late againnnnnnn. Next time when you guys want to go out with her, tell her a earlier timing~ So while waiting, we just take photos.

When Tifflin arrived, headed to Penisula shopping center if I'm not wrong. Don't be shock, we spent there(girlhairdo) for 3h plus. There was way too many customers & we are just too nice to let the owner to do the other customers first. & finally they know we are waiting, they settle all of us. Tifflin, sister & myself bought wigs. Noreen didn't becos she think it is a waste of money. End of the product!

Noreen & me with the wig!

Sister & me with the wig. Hope it looks natural to you all too.

After that, we finally can have our dinner. Was craving for pasta, so....... We went to Pastamania for dinner! After the awesome pasta, we headed to Bugis & continue shopping our ass. Bought a shoe! I really love it. & I'm the credit card of the day, i helped my sister pay for everything she bought cos she is broke. So at the end of the day, I'm broke as well. Finally it was time to go home & had a great & tiring day!

Saturday had work! Morning shift is not bad, but my feet still hurts. But as i get used to this job, my feet is getting better! After work, Noreen went to my house & we dyed our hair red. Both of us are excited for the outcome, but it came out more of brown. :( Only at certain time it looks kinda red. But there's nothing i could do, so just accept it.

Sunday.... MY DAY. I actually had work! 7am-5pm. I woke up at 5am to prepare for my work & when I was about to put on make-up, TCC said the event was cancelled. Omg, freak. & they only informed Noreen but not Tifflin & me. So we didn't know what to do. & it's like 6am, who the hell is awake except for the three of us..? We called the manager of TCC & finally she is awake & tell us it will be confirmed asap. Since we woke up for work, we just decided to have breakfast. Went to Singpost for breakfast & after eating, all of us are all dead tired. Noreen worked in Mac last minute. For Tifflin & me, went home to sleep. Tifflin said she want to sleep at my house, so ok! Ended up, I'm the only pig sleeping for 2h. & before that, on Saturday, i was informed that there will be primary school outing with my two primary school friends that came back from Thailand! I had the urge to go but I have work, but since work is cancelled, I went out with them! I am really thankful that my work is cancelled cos the day was awesome!!!!!!!!!
Went out with Fiona, Adrian, Weishi, Wan Wen, Windon, Fahren & Jahred(the twins) & lastly, Jazlina & Juliana(the two that went back to Thailand)! Juliana changed so much! She slimed down so much. She lost 23kg! 23KG!!!!! If i was her, i will never be able to do it. :( Start asking her how she become so slim & she told me what she did. I'm gonna try it, hehheh! Went ECP. I was wearing a dress so it was kinda inappropriate to cycle, but i still did cos i was wearing a pants underneath.
Rode double bike with Weishi but i told her i will be relaxing cos I'm wearing a dress. Just nice, the twins are riding the double bike too, so we change. Fahren cycle with me & Jahred cycle with Weishi. Since the cycling start, i just keep laughing cos Jahred & Weishi keep fighting! & Fahren keep making me laugh. I must thank Fahren for cycling me from ECP to Changi & cycling back. <3 But i almost died becos of him. He crossed the road when a motor was coming & just nice our gear got problem stop a while & the motor horned us. I screamed & got a scared! Luckily I'm still alive!
After cycling, the rest left & left with the twins, Weishi & Windon. Took quite a long time deciding where to go & decided to go to Bedok Point for dinner! Ate Chicken Hotpot. The food there not bad, & the twins helped me to peel the prawn, so sweet! ^^
After dinner, walked around Bedok & didn't know where to go. The twins & Weishi just kept fighting & keep increasing the points for Weishi & me. Damn funny! Windon went home first. Wanted to go Changi Airport, reached Tanah Merah, Weishi want to go home. So all of us went home.
The twins lived nearby me & so they sent me home! They really changed a lot a lot. Become more gentlemen already. Home & got real tired & headed to bed!

I'M GOING OUT WITH MY PRIMARY SCHOOL FRIENDS AGAIN ON WEDNESDAY! Can't wait. ^^ Will be back with more interesting story & hope to have pictures! Bye~

Better life

2011-10-24T19:37:00.003+08:00

I'm back here becos I am partially free from my studies! I've completed my N Level & feel so free now. :) I don't know how am i gonna fair for my N Level, but i do wish to have a good marks. It's over & i really do not want to think about it, but sometimes i can't help to think & start panicking over the results which will be out probably on the 16th Dec. K, no more bullshitting about my N Level. I went to USS after my N Level was over! Enjoy~

Noreen stayed over at my house before the day we go for USS. We woke up really early just to reach USS with little people so we do not need to queue up for the rides! However, not to my surprise, we are not in time! Becos of Jill & Gloria. Noreen & i was on time, & we even had the time to walk to Paya Lebar & eat! Gathered altogether & head off to USS!
I was really excited when i walk into USS. When I saw the big ball(?) written "Universal", i just can't wait to enjoy immediately! However, god isn't on our side. The weather was rather bad, it just kept raining & never stopped. :(

& there was a man who came to us becos he want to take photo with us. Hahaha! & in return, he help us took photos too!

Walked in & start taking photos. Idk what cartoon is this, really forget everything about my childhood. But this cartoon is so cute. He/she kept copying us laugh, damn cute!

The first ride i took was the "Cylon" ride. Omg, it's awesome! Jill & Gloria didn't take the ride with Noreen, Tifflin & me. They're too afraid of it. :( What a pity! It is my first time that i took the Cylon ride, & when i reach the top & see other people sitting the ride, i got really scared! My heart rate raced & my palm was sweaty. & finally it's our turn to get on to the ride, i just felt like backing out! We sat on the first row some more. When the operator said,"5, 4, 3, 2, 1" Noreen & me screamed already. Hahahaha! & the ride just went down like some crazy thing. It was so scary that i don't know where my heart went to. The only thing i hate about the ride is the front part where it goes very very high & it just go down! The rest is just awesome like crazyyyyy! When the ride ended, i was so happy & excited.
The next ride we went on was the "Human" ride! It is as exciting & great as the "Cylon" ride! Just that it doesn't turn 360 degree. Hehehe.
I can't remember which rides we took, but we literally took all the rides in USS. ^^ Pictures will do the talking!

Oh, i watch the water show. Forgotten what does it call, but yup. The water show. Noreen & i sat on the "soak" area. But we didn't get as wet as we expected. But it's still fun! ^^

Around 7, we left USS becos all the rides has closed. Said bye to USS & head back home. :)

Anyway, I've start working. It is really tiring! I'm working as a banquet(not the coffee shop), but i work as a waitress to serve people in events like wedding. My feet literally hurts like crazy when i walk one step after i end work. Worked for 4 days already & decided to change! It is really too tiring & the manager is really sucky. They only say, but don't do. -.- fuck, go away la.

K, I've been shopping online quite intensively! My pocket gonna have a hole son, omgggg. ;( I need to work doubly hard to get loads of money! & i still have no idea what to wear for my cousin's wedding. She suddenly decided to change & make everyone to wear a maxi for her wedding dinner. I don't want, i think short dresses look & nicer. Oh! I am still dieting, very badly! Trying my best. HAHAHA.

Alright, ending here. Xoxo. <3

A little unusual.

2011-09-04T15:49:00.002+08:00

Now I am in the midst of intense studying, so i always thought that my day will be the same day after day. However, it's not. It's a little unusual yesterday! It's Jill's Birthday tmrw. I thought really hard if should go to somehow... a Birthday celebration.
First concern is of course i have to study, second concern is its in the morning. I am not those people who wake up @ 8am, eat breakfast & whatever. & lastly, i have tuition @ 5pm & i'm really worried that i'll be tired. However, with the persuasion of Jill & her whining plus her super sad face, i decided to go. Since she's been a wonderful friend in whatever ways & I've never celebrated birthday with her, so i thought i should just go & relax for a while!

Woke up @ 8am with really red & tired eyes. & for the the FIRST time, i highlight, FIRST time I am the earliest & not late. In fact, earlier than the time we suppose to meet! The weather is so hot, was wearing a flare long pants & was perspiring a lot.
FINALLY I SAW TIFFLIN & JILL WALKING TOWARDS ME! & soon, Gloria! But guess what?! We still had to wait for Alicia. Omg. So we decided to head to bubbletea shop to get something to cool our body down with the extremely bad weather! Everyone, pls remember! I love tara ice blended! It is awesome! The taste is heavenly nice... *fly to heaven* HAHA.
As soon as Alicia is here, bus 48 is here. It is a 50min-1h journey from Marine Terrence to Holland. :) Otw, i studied SS with Tifflin & made Tifflin to remember all the dates & important things! & yeap, she remembered.
Reach holland's Crystal Jade for dim sum & food start coming. When i saw the food i was happy becos i can eat!!!!!!! But soon, I'm bloated. Not only me, everyone! Hahahahahaha. Stopped eating & then its time to sing happy birthday song!!!!!!!!! Jill was so embarrassed! Hahahahaha. After that, went to subway to slack & went home!

Photo time. ;)

Can't believe I'm taking my N Level Chinese Paper tmrw. Tuesday, SS. Wednesday, English. & the rest next month. Everyone wish me luck okay!!!!
Bye!

It's been a long time!

2011-08-21T01:16:00.003+08:00

HI. It's been a while ever since i blogged. I am just too busy with my studies. Which means i have been revolving round my books for 3 months already. I cannot wait for my N Levels to be over so i can truly play.
Yup, even though my O Levels are not over, but at least a big examination in my life has passed. & i guess i have the right to at least have fun & be wild to the maximum right? As for O Level... HAHA. Next year then start. Or maybe in the holidays i will at least study a little bit. & my little is really little. Come on, who will be in the mood to study after spamming with homework for at least 9 months?

I just finished my prelims on Friday. It is a big relief & a big thing that is over. I was so stress over prelims becos i did last minute study which is not right. Becos i stay up late just to study finish what I've not finished & i will just feel extremely stress. & when the last paper is over, i feel as if N Levels was over. In fact, NOT. Had only 3h of sleep per day for consecutively a week? Yeap, so i actually planned beforehand to just go home after my last paper & sleep throughout till i feel like waking up. Apparently, my babes are just too well in persuading people to go out... So i ended up sleeping for 30 minutes only. Wore heels & i almost died on Friday. :( My feet feels like it will break anytime. K, will talk more about it at the later of the post.

Went Haji Lane to take a look at ohsofickle. Whenever i go there, i hope Tammy will be there. However i guess... Tammy & i do not have the fate to see each other, hhahaha lol. Do hope to see her one day face to face, ahhh! She is one perfect girl. Yes, even though her body is filled with tattoo but so what? We do wrong things when we're young cos we're still immature right. But whatever it is, i still love Tammy! She is slim, her legs are not fat like mine & she is pretty. :/ If only i have her prettiness, body & legs. Nvm! I'm trying to go on a diet now. I lost 3kg! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I deserve a clap. /clap/ Back to topic...

Was really tempted to buy a lot of nice clothes from osf but i am trying to save up cos my bank never reach $1000 & all the money is gone! I only bought a knitted cardigan from there & a galaxy dress for my sister. The cardigan fits anything! & it is comfortable. Wear it to the airport & it'll keep you warm. Spent quite a long time in osf becos its just so awesome! After that head to many other nice shops but came out empty-handed. Cos NO SPENDING OF MONEY. After Haji, walk to Bugis cos babes want to eat Pastamania. When i heard Pastamania i was like,"AHHH I WANT!!!!!" Guess what? I didn't eat in the end. First, its fattening. Second, its expensive. Third, needa save money. Forth, i have dinner at home. Poor me. When i reach Pastamania, my feet are breaking already! My toes. :( Accompanied XingWen to starbucks! I am becoming like XingWen even though i dont mix with her everyday. SHE IS TOO INFLUENTIAL. GAHHHH. Afterwards headed to Bugis Street. Walked for a while & i went home first. Really could not take the pain that my heels are giving me. SO.. Never wear heels to shop. It is torturous.

HOME & BECAME A HAPPY GIRL. Walking on flat ground is so much more better. Yeap, thats the end of my day! :> HOW ABOUT YOU GUYS? Hope you guys had fun becos its TGIF when i was out!

Photo time. :)

Byebye!

A day.

2011-05-11T01:17:00.004+08:00

Hi.

Noreen & me literally went crazy. Yeah, we wanted to act cool to take photos & i just want to upload it & talk about it.
If i don't do anything, one day i will just stop blogging becos i have nothing to blabber about, haha. Agree? Yes, agree. But maybe some of you may think that blogging is just to blog about your life & certain matters. Don't tell me you gonna blog about a day that you just sleep on the bed & daydream. -.- (You all may not be stupid to even blog about that day, i know.) But what if your hands are itchy, you have nothing to do & you thought of blogging? So yes, get what i mean right now? Haha yes all of you do.

Noreen & I met up for dinner at SingPost Mac. However, I did not eat. I just went to accompany her. (My plan for my diet is still on ok. Hope it is still going on well~) Oh, yesterday all i ate was just... Half of large seaweed fries & a Mac Flurry.. Yes, all damn fat right? But ey, i only ate that. Should be ok right? While blogging, my stomach is growling eh. Pity me a bit la. :(

Noreen went home with me around 9.30pm. WE SWAM. We had no idea what time the lights of the swimming will be switched off so we didn't care much & just stop swimming when the lights says goodnight.
Both of just kept swimming back & forth, suddenly, ah, no light anymore. Only managed to swim 40plus laps when we aimed to swim for 50laps. But its alright. Becos within 20minutes, 40plus laps not bad eh. Plus got rest a bit a bit. Quite productive.

Showered together with Noreen, fyi, with swimming costume on. Shampoo our hair we started playing with water. Damn fun, & i am sure both of us grown even closer than before. We just kept playing with water, splash each other, wash other. HAHAHA ENJOYYYY SO MUCHHH. :D

Watched tv & took those photos on top. ^^
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I went to run in ECP with Jolene on Saturday, stopped a bit & continue. Next day, a little aching in my muscle. I do really hope that day i lose some calories. Then i went for swimming, 70 laps. PLS. TELL ME I AM LOSING CALORIES. & what. Yesterday swim. PLS LET ME LOSE WEIGHT. :/
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I have no idea what are you thinking. Do you actually mean everything you've said to me? Becos it feels like... A Lie. What i am doing now is just to protect myself, to make you actually care(if you even care.) & what i do is what some of girls will do even i know you're those type who don't care. But yes.
Not in the right mood now. Kinda sad over some stuff, but trying to adjust my own emotions. So yeap.

Bye! ♥

FATS.

2011-05-08T20:29:00.004+08:00

I am so jealous of some people with nice legs, skinny arms & slim body. Are they gifted or do they put in effort to have it? Hmm, i am somehow in the process of trying to on diet. I really hope this time i will succeed. At least let me lose like 1kg-3kg la? I don't want any gaining of weight. I want losing of weight. Yes! But i think its kinda hard. There's a lot of requirement to really slim down la. First, is how strong is your will power. Second, exercise. Third, eat lesser. Fourth, eat less fried food. Fifth, stop with everything you like to eat that is fattening.
& know what? All these requirements are kinda hard for me to do it. My will power may be strong, but its on & off. I may just stop with dieting & eat what i feel like eating. Becos i have this mindset like.. "Okay, I've eaten very little for the pass few days, can la. Lose some calories, eat all these should be okay la ah." But i have never thought that what i lose, once i eat things i like to eat, i gain back what i lost, or maybe even gain calories from it. I hate to exercise. I am just not a sporty person. I AM A INDOOR KIND OF PERSON. But i like swimming becos i don't need to feel hot. After swimming i will feel hot la, at least will not be smelly & sticky. Eating lesser may be alright for me. But make sure no one eat something nice in front of me. If not they'll temp me & i may just go buy it or steal some. (signs of no will power.) Most of my favorite food is fried food. LIKE.. WHOSE FAVORITE FOOD IS NOT FRIED?! Majority sure is fried food one la, trust me. I CANNOT EVEN DO THE FIRST 4 CRITERIA, HOW TO DO THE LAST ONE!?

I dislike how the fats wobble when i walk. I dislike how the fats looks like. I dislike how thick the fats are. I dislike how ugly the fats looks like. I dislike having fats.

(got a cartoon one so i will not insult people which is really fat!!!)
What if one day i become like what is showing in the cartoon? The butt so big, the thigh so big, the arm so big, the face expression bend down like want to die already. Even the cat see my butt also got a shock. Thinking,"WTH! SUCH BIG BUTTS EXIST ONE AH?!" I really don't want this kind of image on myself.
I think i continue eating non-stop, i'll look like the picture on top. By then, even a pet don't want me. :( No one want to be friends with me, no one loves me, no one know me. & i will die of a earlier age. Sigh, this is depressing.
If i really can control myself from eating certain food, better. So.. will i ever be like this??? :/
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Will i ever be like SNSD? (even they photoshop, how much can they photoshop it?) Legs so slim, body so nice, so pretty, arm so skinny! IF ONE DAY I BECOME LIKE THEM.. I WILL MAKE SURE I WILL MAINTAIN IT, FOREVER. But the fact is, i can't. :( & the fact is, this will never happen in me. SIGH.

Why am i not gifted with all these?! :(

& guess what! I am craving a lot of food now thanks to Noreen! Then slowly from one food to another. I want to eat. Can i? OMG! JAIMEEEEEEE. WHY YOU SO PIG? Someone, help me?

bye.

Best.

2011-05-07T02:33:00.003+08:00

IT IS MAY! If you're a secondary student, you will be having your mid-year either now, or earlier or later. Okay, i am not really sure if i will do well for mid-year becos i admit that i studied everything last minute. Before mid-year are here, i am not studying as much as i am suppose to. I am down with English, Chinese, Combine Human, Bio & Lit Paper 2. I am overjoyed becos i have completed with quite a number of paper. Means i am somehow pass a quarter of the stage for N Level? What i mean is, done with the major stuff in terms of education no other things. So yeah, quite good la. Bad thing is it is nearing N Level & i know i am not prepared through the crazy studying for last minute study. I realise i have like piles of things i am clueless about that i have to spend time on. So i am gonna make sure i continue studying even Mid-years are over. Okay, maybe a few days in between i will take a break like go out or whatever.
I had my Geog & Lit paper yesterday. Hmm, Lit was pretty hard. I think i wrote 998349399988679889998676789 of craps. People's answers are so potential & acceptable. MINE. Can just crash the paper & recycle it. (omg, i am saving the earth. goodgood.) Geog, i really tried my best. I am not very sure if i will pass. BUT... Even if i pass, maybe just a pass or pass by a few marks which is not very ideal yet when it is only for mid-year not prelims or the real N level paper. Just hope for the best.

Hmm, i just spend like $133 on clothes recently. I SERIOUSLY HAVE TO STOP. But i really cannot resist the temptation. :( The clothes/shoes are just so nice. Daddy, increase my pay pls even though you've increased by $100.

I AM MEETING JOLENE IN 7 HOURS TIME! We are gonna go for a run to on diet! YEAPYEAP. & i have no idea why i am not sleeping yet. I have been eating quite a lot. I feel like a glutton. :( MY STOMACH IS DAMN HUGE AS COMPARED TO THE STOMACH LAST WEEK. Look how bad is it. One week, the size of the stomach so much of a difference. NEED TO CONTROL MY DIET. Yes, i have to.

Okay, bye!

I'm declared broke.

2011-04-29T23:08:00.002+08:00

Hello! Today is Friday. & you know what, today is the release of iPad 2! I WANT IT. There's white iPad 2 & i want the smart cover. Daddy is buying it for me as my birthday present as i requested from him that i want iPad 2 when he asked me what i want for my birthday. So yes.

The smart covers!

iPad 2. :D CHIO HOR THE WHITE ONE?
& before Friday, it is Thursday! & that is the day when iPhone 4 white is released.

I AM TOTALLY INTO IT. & one of my friend has it. Jealous much! However, i am getting iPhone 4 white asap. Cos actually i was iPhone-less for like a month plus becos it flew to China for repair. It is miserable when you was once a iPhone user & then not. COS THERE IS NO INTERNET. You cannot do anything with your hands in the bus which is damn boring la. However, guess what. My iPhone 3GS just flew back from China today & I'm using it happily now even not using iPhone 4 white. Becos as long as i have a iPhone, i am contented. But of course when you have iPhone 3GS, you will aim for better. Daddy will get me iPhone 4 white after my mid-year. Around that period of time la. :) & i think i am going to persuade him to get me my iPad 2 when i get my phone as well. Hahahaha. I WANT TO GET MY IPAD ASAP TOO OK! Oh & if i have both iPad 2 white & iPhone 4 white, i have the small & big version of it. HAHA.
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Alright, this title of the post is "I'm declared broke". There's of course a reason to it. & the one & only reason is... I AM SHOPPING TOO MUCH. All the clothes are just so nice, & some is manufactured by the blog shop owners. So you will never find it outside la, so i just buy it. BUT THERE'S SOME THAT I HAVEN'T BOUGHT! :( & i spent $200 plus on cosmetics. & the cosmetics includes only Concealer, Foundation & Prime. ALL OF THE ITEM IS FROM LANCOME. Lancome is the brand i love the most! :) HAHAHAHA.

Teint idole miracle! IT WORKS AWESOMELY!

This will make your make-up last!

3-in-1
UV expert, conceal dark eye circles or any flaws. SPF 50 PA!

CHIO CHIO CHIO! Can't wait for the arrival. ^^

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH! It is damn nice. I just want to arrive NOW.
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Wishlist!

I am getting it tmrw! :) I will have my allowance by then.

GO ON WITH WHITE OR MAYBE BLACK(NOT SURE), AWESOME! Hot.

I LOVE THIS PANTS!!!! NO MATTER WHAT I WILL GET IT!

I will seriously go for a intense diet just to wear this awesomely.

VINTAGEY FEELING! I WILL BUY IT TOO. HAHAAHAHAHAH.

I really love this a lot. I just want it so badly. However, out of stock. HEART DAMN PAIN. :( My preference colour is black becos i have dark skin tone.

I could have bought it becos when i see it, there's still stock. Was hesitating if i would present it nicely just because of the colour. AHH. I should be fairer. But nvm, I'm ok with my skin tone now.. I guess?
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BAD NEWS BAD NEWS!
Mid-years is starting this Tuesday. HOW. I am not even prepared for it yet. I am really slacking a lot. I wasn't like this in the beginning of the year, but why now? I know i am slacking but i am not reacting to it, i am not taking action. ARGH. JAIME NG, YOU HAVE TO STUDY. NO MORE TIME TO WASTE LEH! Pls ah you.

Life isn't as good, but i am not gonna bother about it anymore. SO EVERYDAY, I JUST LIVE IN MY OWN WORLD DOING WHAT I THINK IT IS RIGHT TO DO. :D

I may be going out tmrw with Tifflin tmrw. Jolene is suppose to go with us, but last minute she can't. So i'm thinking if should go(not becos Jolene is not going) cos i may want to study or some thing. AH. CONFUSE. :<

OKKK BYE!

Pictures from www.geraldinet.com www.forever21.com www.missypixie.livejournal www.google.com www.ohsofickle.com.sg
You all can check out their blog shop & start shopping your ass off like me!

I am proud to be a member of kcchoir. ♥

2011-04-21T20:35:00.002+08:00

I am extremely proud to say that Kcchoir got a gold for syf.

Oh well, I am listening to the audio of kcchoir SYF 2011. :D I am not getting bored of it even though hearing n times. Especially Jaakobin. It is the best! It is awesome. Even other conductors said that this is the best version of Jaakobin they have ever heard! Haha, the last part of Jaakobin was awesome. IN PITCH. The chords are so tight! Sop 1 didn't went sharp, oh yeah. Hehe.

19th April, it is the our first SYF with Mr Toh. He is a great conductor, & i swear he is the best. :) Even better than our previous two conductors, no offence. But yeah, thats the truth. Mr Toh was so calm in teaching us despite making the same mistakes over again & again. Mr Toh always come out with lame jokes to make choir practices fun. Mr Toh tells us meaningful story that make us apply in our life. Mr Toh don't go for other choir practices becos of us sometimes. HOW AWESOME CAN HE BE?
As for kcchoir, we're just too awesome. We start off with the two selected SYF song piece lousy. Mistakes after mistakes. & worst, every week we repeat the same mistakes over again & again. No improvement. Noisy bunch of girls talking non-stop, leaders shout at us to make us stop talking, we got so irritated becos they're being such a bitch. Everyone don't put in their best during sectionals, during combine. WE JUST SUCK. 2 weeks before SYF, we're still out of pitch, having auditions, dynamic & everything is still not perfect. 1 week before SYF, was improving after those scoldings & naggings from the leaders & Mr Toh. 1 day before SYF, getting the chords together for Yoru. ON THE DAY OF SYF, EVERYONE IS SO DISTRACTED. Warm-up sucks. Mr Toh came, rehearse, Yoru sharp. Rehearse twice & left for sota. 2 mouthful of pi pa gao before leaving KC. Another 2 mouthful of pi pa gao before performing. We prayed, we shivered, we trembled, just hoping for the best. Held hands walking into the backstage of the stage before entering.
Doors open, walked in with a smile. "On stage now is choir No. 118 from CHIJ Katong Convent. They will be performing The Wind, followed by Jaakobin & Yoru. Let's welcome CHIJ Katong Convent & their conductor, Mr Terrence Toh." *claps* Mr Toh walked in, concentrate on him & nothing else. Piano start playing "The Wind" & we began to sing. Piano played wrongly, but we didn't go out of tune. Messy, but we still did our best. Jaakobin, perfect. Erika solo was totally in pitch. Wanted to cry so much after Erika sing & Mr Toh said,"Well Done" twice with his lips. With his thumbs up. Yoru, trying our very best to be good in it. Gave our best & went sharp for the last page. We didn't know & thought it was ok till Mr Toh told us that Yoru went major sharp, not minor sharp. Everyone got so scared & start worrying. Teachers went into the SYF room to know about our results. Kcchoir waiting outside, never leaving the place. Worrying, hugging & praying. Teachers came out, ran to them &... "GOLD!" Everyone started crying becos we're too happy. We didn't expected so much after knowing we went sharp for Yoru for the most important page! Started taking photos. & all the photos were filled with our happy face. Our hard work paid off. Everyone started shouting in the bus becos we're too happy. :)
Got back home, thanked Mr Toh in facebook & his status really satisfied many choir members. Cos in his heart we really tried our best & he is proud of us.

Definitely there's more people who liked it after a longer period of time.

KC Choir did not bring down Mr Toh's reputation as a gold conductor. Becos with his guidance, all choirs will get gold or gwh. We was really fretting over the award that we gonna get FOR Mr Toh, not ourselves or the school. Worse, we are his first female choral singer, which means first SSA choir! Of course we want to let him be very proud right?! & oh yes, we made him proud.

I really don't know how to say how proud i am of KC Choir. Thank you choir for putting your best, spending time in choir & thank you for everything that you guys did for choir! I am stepping down & coming back next year. Even i am coming back next year, i am still missing choir & feel like i am not coming back anymore. :<
CHOIR, WORK HARD OK! I love you guys a lot. :D ♥

Our wonderful performance. :) Only Jaakobin. "The Wind" & "Yoru" is not up.

My life isn't as colourful as i expect.

2011-04-17T00:21:00.004+08:00

The width of my smile will decrease soon.

I feel that my life is getting more dull as day pass. There's more things that i have think deeply & more things to worry. I know our life is full of ups & downs. I know our life is not as colourful as the rainbow. Its just this theory that i cannot find a reason for me to believe that my life cannot be as colourful as the rainbow.

"The rainbow will never look dull when it appears in the sky becos it always appear with 7 bright colours."

Yes, this is the theory about the rainbow & i just can't accept that my life cannot be like the rainbow. The rainbow have 7 colours, but my life have two? Which is black & white? Ha.

In my everyday life, the people i am contact to is my friends. & this actually shows how much my friends mean to me & how much i treasure them. But i don't get why... friends could actually fight becos of someone or just merely a few sentences they heard from others. You know from the beginning of the year, I feel damn hard to be a very good friend to some of my friends. They may not like the person i am, but sometimes its just cannot help it. Try being in my shoe, if you're like "this" for quite a couple of years, it is darn hard to change to please any of you. This year, i am very weak, in terms of my own character. I can say that i am not that bad-tempered & i don't voice out my stand. So whatever that happens(friendship wise), I've been giving in. Its either i keep quiet or to talk to this particular person so everything will be better. However, i am really getting very very tired doing all this giving in, keeping quiet & taking the first move to please any of you. Like seriously, what have i did wrong that i make you people treat me "this" way? Ok, sudden feeling of dislike? Pekcek with me for a moment for no reason? Ha, if is those kind of no reason reasons, then don't you think i am kinda innocent? Just try. The feeling.
One day i just talk to any of you like damn dao. One day, any of you talk to me & i either don't reply or just nod my head. & the next moment i see other of my friends, i begin smiling & talking non-stop. WORSE OF ALL? Your closest friend is doing that to you. It is actually ok if any of you don't understand how i feel or maybe... You don't think there is a need to understand how i feel becos you think you are correct. I'm fine with it, cos everyone in this world is just so fucking self-centered.
(pls, after writing, don't assume. my world revolve with many people, not only you. so don't think so much.)

KC Choir SYF will be this coming Tuesday. I feel excited as well as... nervous. We really have been working very hard & have been putting our best every practice. I really have no idea what award we will be bringing back to school. I know Mr Toh said he don't need the award/colour. As long as when we perform, we know we've put in our best, there will not be any regrets. But to me, i just need the award as a motivation so i can continue to pull through, especially this year. & of course, my passion made me sing with KC Choir till today. So choir! Lets just put in our best & get the award we want. :)

Mid-years are coming. :( & i don't know a lot of things. I don't want to fail so many subjects again! I am not studying yet. I need someone to motivate me & keep reminding me how many more months to N Level. So i will have the urgency. Can anyone help?

Recently, i am feeling extremely tired. No matter how long i sleep, i still feel tired. HOW TO NOT BE TIRED?

& you know what. I spend $200++ on cosmetics. I have been spending too much money, what happen to me? Why am i becoming like this? I really have to save up, help me pls. But i proud to say i am a Lancome member now. HEHE. I GOT THEIR CARD! :D Support Lancome, their stuff are just awesome! Trust me. Cos if you trust me, you trust Michelle Phan!

But before i end off, i am glad to have my friends. Really.

Lord, pls let me stay concentrate in my studies & let choir members to stay healthy & safe for the upcoming SYF. Keep all the distractions & problems away from me so i can continue pulling through my life. I also hope my life will be coloured with more bright colours so i can always keep the smile on my face. Amen.

My tears shows how much i care & love.

2011-03-25T14:55:00.003+08:00

I've spent the whole day crying. Reason is becos my parents are going back to Malaysia to visit Mama. I thought they would let me go back despite of schooling. I thought they would understand that i want to go back very badly. However, they don't. My mum understood me, but my dad don't. He think that my studies is more important than Mama. No, in my heart, if anything happen to Mama, she is more important than anything. Dad kept saying she is alright, she is more stable now. So don't worry. Dad, did you just say that so i would stop worrying & not go to Malaysia? I will never feel safe until i see her. What is the point when my heart is at Malaysia, with Mama? I will not be paying attention in class. I will never feel the security till i see her with my own eye. I will never feel any happier without seeing her, especially her voice. So why can't i go back? At least when i go back i still can talk to her(even if she cannot answer me). At least i still get to see her move, at least i can still see her when she is still breathing. AT LEAST SHE CAN LOOK AT ME & NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE HER & THE TIMES WHEN SHE TOOK CARE OF ME. Why must you all just let me go back when she have gone? & by the time what i want to tell her & even see her the last time have vanish. Why?! I don't get it. The another part that i don't understand is, Dad told me Mama is fine. But when i was having dinner with Mum, Mum said Mama is in a very dangerous state & isn't looking good. Ha. So one of you choose to not tell me the truth? Have you all ever thought of how much my heart worry for her? SHE TOOK CARE OF ME. I sleep with her! You know the feeling?! I just want to rush back now & look at her. I want her to be alive, i cannot let her just slide pass my life like how grandma did! I only go back when Grandma passed away! & when i saw her inside the coffin, i got a shock & immediately i cried. So can anyone of you out there ever know how i feel?!

Her is my Mama. She is just too good.
I still remember the sound of the fan when i am asleep. I still remember the feeling when i sleep with her. I still remember she always feeds me rice with soup. & even though the only ingredient is the pork ribs which is with the soup, it is the best food. & becos of her, i have to have soup everyday. Without fail. I still remember she shower me. & the soap smell is so nice. I still remember whenever i come back from Singapore, she would buy stickers for me. The stickers is always 101 dalmatians. Becos she knew i love stickers & 101 dalmatians at that time. & she let me paste it on the cupboard. She drives me on a motorcycle. I always sleep on the mattress outside the living room. & it is really comfortable. Even though her house isn't very nice, isn't air-condition, but becos of it is not nice & not air-conditioned, it creates more feelings & more love. You get the feeling? I really have a lot of memories with her... How am i going to let it go if she really leaves me without seeing her the last time before her last breathe?

However, i want to thank Amanda for cheering me up when i was crying my heart out. ♥

I have choral exchange tmrw. I have to concentrate tmrw in singing & not let KC Choir go down. My heart cannot be flying off to other parts of the world. I have to overcome this stage... My commitments to choir cannot be affected by my family matters. Probably the next few days, i would look somehow different. However i will try to bring up my mood. I will not let the people around me that truly care for me worry for me.

I shall stop here.

Life is full of problems

2011-03-25T01:52:00.003+08:00

I am back with using blogger instead of wordpress. I think that blogger suits me more & i work better with it as compared to wordpress. So yes, i will start blogging in this blog again if i have time. If not, i'll probably be MIA.

Actually, i have a lot of things that i want to say. As what many people always say, there is so much things that you don't know where to begin & you just don't know how to phrase what you want to say.

Firstly, i am having my N Levels this year. I am not studying as hard as i am expected to. I am worrying about it, i speak, but no actions. So it is pointless to keep saying how stress i am over N Level & how much i worry about. Maybe i should really start working hard so i can achieve my goals. I'll work hard, & i must.

Secondly, SYF is coming out. SYF is on the 19th April. Choir isn't sounding very good yet. From my own opinion, it is not up to the standard yet. SYF 2011, KC Choir may not get a gold. I just don't get why people join choir but they're not putting any effort into choir. You guys join choir. The first reason that come up to everyone's mind is, BECOS YOU LOVE TO SING. Since you enjoy singing, sing for the choir. Be in pitch, support & at least put in your best in every practices. If not, you're just slowing down the whole choir. Which sucks. Cos people who is not putting any effort into SYF, i just feel pissed & i hope you guys just get out of choir la. Don't waste time, it is precious. -.- Just try putting yourself in the seniors' shoe. We've worked so hard for SYF 2009 by getting a gold. ARE YOU ALL GOING TO BRING DOWN TO SILVER? BRONZE? WORST, COP?! Some of you are just so self-centered. Especially the juniors. & i mean the Sec 1 & 2. & the seniors who are graduating this year, when they want to use choir to enter a JC. SYF 2011 KC Choir Silver. It will just lower the chance for them to get into the JC they want. So pls, spare a thought alright?! Srsly.

Thirdly, Mum told me about Mama being sick & might just leave me anytime. I was sad, but i didn't know how to show out how much i really care & how sad i am. So i just kept quiet & asked some questions. Only till my mum told me about if anything happen, she will be going back. Immediately, i said,"I want to go. I have to go..." While saying the sentence, my tears just kept flowing down. However, i really hope nothing happen to her. Especially before 19 April, becos i cannot leave & just go back. I have my commitments for KC Choir. & i really would not want to be irresponsible. So yeah. So pls god? Nothing must happen. Really. :( It really sucks that God create illnesses & stuff that will lead to death. I don't like to see anyone i know to die, even my enemy. I mean, who would like to see people die? Especially someone you know & someone that means something to you. If you really enjoying seeing the population decrease, i would be happy seeing you die then.

Lastly, i am getting distracted over friendship problems. I guess no one know that i am actually having a friendship problem. Only a few know? Not many people know becos i did not talk to you about it, i don't want to have problems over again & again. This year is a very important year for me & i don't think problems like friendship should actually make me feel super distracted & feel sad over it. So i'll head her advise & just not bother.

These are just the main things that is happening in my life that impacts me more every single day, except the 3rd one. I think about the first, second & last one every single day. & other things i want to say is just a more in depth about it. Yess.

Alright, it looks damn ugly without photos. So i am just going to add random photos that i have since 2011 with my darls. :)

Aren't we cute? :D

Stayover is the best night with anyone~ :D

We're just so... BOOMS.

Amanda love me so much. Hee.

AH, i love this photo! HAHAHA WE'RE JUST SO... FUNNY.

Chinese New Year~

My dear niece, Joelle.

Noreen loitering at my house, but she is 100% welcome. ^^

The starting of 2011 with my wonderful friends. :D

My first time countdown for 2011 in Malaysia with my cousins. :) Really fun.

There is E-learning tomorrow. I don't have to go school, yay. :) But i have to wake up at 8am to do e-learning. It is already 2.34am. I AM STILL AWAKE. I have a feeling i will miss doing some subjects... Hehe. k bye! Shall sleep soon.

2010-09-17T23:48:00.002+08:00

Hey people, I've shift. :)
http://thegorgeous.wordpress.com
As what i know, wordpress is the best, so probably i should try it. This blog will still be existing for memories. Hahaha, or maybe i'll update it if i'm really bored. Haha. Alright, go to the new blog now! :D

I can't control.

2010-09-14T20:23:00.006+08:00

This 3 weeks, i keep telling myself that i don't even bother. I keep telling my friends that i don't bother. But they have no idea that actually every moment I'm thinking about you. Before the day start, the first thing that i thought of is you. Before the day end, the first thing that i thought of is again, you. When i can't sleep, i think of... you, once again. You're just the only topic that i can think of when there's so much other topic for me to think of. You're just the only one that i want to think when there's so many other people that are worth my thinking. My friends thought that i was able to live a life without you and strong enough to cope a life without you. I thought i could too, i thought i could just move on with my life, not thinking of you, not bothering about you, not looking at you, but I've lied to myself for 3 weeks. I've lived in denial for 3weeks. 3 weeks. 3 weeks not being with you. 3 weeks, how did i even manage to that? 3 weeks, trying not to be with you.

Today starting of the day I've already thought to write a letter to you. And when the school is gonna end, i wrote it, after a lot of process. I thought my friends would support me in writing the letter. I thought. "I thought" this word always comes out from people when they know they're in wrong but they just want themselves to be correct and they live in denial. Yes, i've used "i thought" a lot of times ever since then. I knew it was wrong to pen down how i truly feel, but in the end i did. My friends was stopping me to do so. They snatched the paper, they almost tore it. I took back the paper and started tearing while saying this,"I do bother, i repeatedly tell you all that i don't bother, but every second I'm thinking about it. I DO BOTHER! Please, just let me write. It would be the last time, really..." My friends kept quiet for a moment and said this,"But if you wanna forget about it, you should not bother." Come on, everyone knows its not easy to forget it. Its really not easy at all. Forgetting about it is even harder than studying for anything. 9934939993499999 harder. You all aren't in my shoe, you all do not have situations like mine, you all have not experienced it before, but i do. I know how it feels, i know how it hurts, i know how pain is it, you all don't. None of you out there would truly know how pain it is. I can just cry out now, typing all these. I was given a limit of space to write down how i truly feel, becos my friends told me that i could only write half a paper. Furthermore, i just don't know how to express how i feel. I srsly don't. When it passed it to you, i don't even dare to look into your eyes, not even your face becos i may just cry again at that moment.

After 3 weeks, i still cried, for you. I thought crying for you, will never happen again, but it happened, and I'm thinking why did that even happen.

My blog contains all the things i want you to know, hoping that maybe, you'd drop by, realise something and make a difference.

Sometimes i just wonder why is it just so hard to forget about a person. Its easy to build up the relationship, its easy to be with the person, its easy to love, its easy do everything, but its just so hard to forget about a person that you love so much. I asked my sister,"How did you forget about him? When you left him, you would think of him every second right? Since every second you're thinking about him, how can you even forget?" My sister said,"Yes, you will think about _____ every second, but soon, it will dilute." I said back,"Its hard, right? :(" My sister said,"It take times, but it hurts." At that moment, i felt like the whole world is against me. It just seems like a damn big rock smashed on me. Ouch. It hurts.

I thought you would understand, i thought you would regret, i thought... Once again i thought. Ha. So ironic.

CONTINUED.
You know everyday, i still live with a life, full of hope. Hoping one day that will happen. Every single day, I'm just hoping for that very one day to happen. I told myself i should not hope for that day to happen, it won't happen. It will not happen. However, no matter how many times I've say "will not happen" to me a lot of times, but i still hope for that very one day to happen, i don't know why. I even gave you hope for that to happen, but there isn't any difference, still. When i know there will not be any difference already, but i still continued giving you hope, continued giving myself hope, living in a life, full of hope just for that very one day to happenn. Why am i so silly?

Its so funny when someone says about something about a person when oneself do. Its just like you(the you can be anyone of you). You bitch about me, you write about me, you told me to keep comments to myself, you tell me full of stupid bullshits, but you don't know that what you're doing is 100% the thing i'm doing. But not even you do it, i do it to. I bitch about you, i do all sorts of stuffs in my blog, in my facebook & everywhere, I've also told you to keep your comments to yourself when I'm bitching about you 24/7. Its funny right? Thats just how God create humans.

Tmrw choir, there is somehow a audition. This time round, not the leaders who is the one who gonna audition us, but the conductor. Its like, O-M-G. How am i gonna stay chill? But i think it will be fine for me? Cos i do it twice a year. Will see how it goes tmrw.

Today something very embarassing in class happened. Mr Tan ask,"So what time do you have to reach school on Friday?" I was so confident, i shouted,"6PM!!!!!!" & the whole class said.... "5.45PM." Okay, fuck, what did i just do to embarrass myself?! Deborah laughed non-stop & so badly. When she calm down, i turned & looked her she start laughing again. IS MY FACE THAT FUNNY? Is it written "Please laugh at me."? WHAT!

& i don't know what i do, someone said this to me... "Jaime, you are always paiseh-ing yourself." Argh, whats wrong with me & the word, paiseh. Fml.

The scariest person.

2010-09-11T21:19:00.002+08:00

In this world, there are scary people that we are scared of. The disipline mistress, gangsters, hooligans, ahlians, ahbengs, police, parents, friends ain't the scariest person to me. However, to me, the most scariest person i'm scared of is to keep stuffs to herself, putting on a strong front in front of everyone, saying "I'm fine" when inside she is hurting so badly, cheering up people when she doesn't feel good too. Becos we will never know the true them, we will never know when they are truly happy, we will never know when will they just breakdown becos she couldn't longer keep the sadness to herself, thats why they are the scariest.

So close to each other, yet so far.
When i walked home from SingPost today, i saw a very beautiful scenery. It was the moon & the star. It was literally beside each other. I immediately took a photo of it. A moon & star makes me remind of she & myself. :) The moon represent her, the star represent me. We came about this mooney & stary thing becos we had tuition together. After tuition, we always have to walk a very dark path. We will hold our hands & walk together. We also always look up & we always see a moon & stars. & we argued who to be what. So we decided that you shall be the moon, & i shall be the star. Hahah, it was really sweet. It was really nice. It was really worth remembering.

On Thursday, i slept at 5am.& the next day i have to wake up at 11 to meet my cousin in parkway & afterwards Jolyn's party. Haha. What was i doing? I was watching hongkong drama. Its just damn addicting. Hahah. Used iPhone to sign in to MSN. Talked to Amanda, i paiseh myself with a typo error, & her reply sound so funny. Totally can imgaine if she say that in real life.

DAMN PAISEH LA, FOR ME. Hahaha.

Didn't wanna use my lappy, however, my phone no batt liao. So no choice, i brought out my lappy to use. Hahah. Then i tweeted this.

Rae replied back this.

I replied this.

Rae replied this.

I replied her is,"Da jia dou shi nu ren ma! HAHAH STUPID. Rae replied this.

She always say she type wrong. HAHAHA, FUNNY. Then i tweeted one again, Rae got it. Wow, shocked. xD Can you believe, Amanda tried it too?!?!!! HAHA, SHE TOLD ME THROUGH MSN. HAHAHAHA.

Amanda tweeted this that made me laugh so badly. HAHAHAHAHAHA.

Alright, shall talk about Jolyn's party! I took 16 polaraids in Jolyn's party. However, some of it, my friends kept it. HMM! I scanned all of the polaraids. :D

Xingwen & Tifflin. :D

XingWen! HAHAHA. :D

Tifflin. :D

Amandaaaa. :D

Clique~! (No noreen)

My baby, Denise! MISS HER LOADS. Kept hugging her.

Geraldine, the pig. Hahah.

Tifflinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. :D

Jolyn, the birthday girl. :D (her actual birthday is on the 15 though!)

Shuchun! :D

Sonia! :D

Jolene! :D
THERE'S ONE MORE POLORAID! & ITS ALMOST ALL BLACK THANKS TO TIFFLIN. She blocked the flash. & its so so so black. But still can see Jolene & Tifflin's face. Not mine. :( ARGH.
Played some games. "I never", "Hide & Seek" & some more. Took photos & etc.

I looked shocked thanks to Sonia! She lied to me that my hair have cake. ARGH.

Jolene did not tell me it was zoomed in. CHEH. But it turned out nice! :) I look cute! HAHAHAHA. :X

Then they played the "SMASH THE CAKE" game! Oh gosh, Meiyee was like Jolyn, your cake. Everyone already know that Meiyee just gonna smash on Jolyn's face. Then Jolyn was like,"Are you gonna put it on my face?" Meiyee said,"Nonono, just showing!" Slowly, the cake went nearer & nearer to Jolyn's face & THERE IT GOES THE CAKE ONTO JOLYN'S FACE! :D

Then they start putting cake on everyone! I got so scared, i hide under the table. Then i was thinking maybe they won't make me, i get out. However, i look at the chaos, i went back under the table! Hahah, at this time, Amanda came to join me, i was shocked, thought someone knew i was under the table. Hahaha. Bern know we was under the table. EVERYONE KENA THE CAKE ON THEIR FACE, HAIR, CLOTHES, & BERN CAME UNDER THE TABLE TO MAKE US. I IMMEDIATELY RUN OUT OF THE TABLE. HAHA. Tifflin fall. Lol, it was a damn loud fall. Afterwards, the chaos was over, helped them in clearing their hair & everywhere. The floor was filled with cakes too. Left the party at 9plus, Pig's father fetched Tifflin, Xingwen, Amanda & me to East Coast Park. :D Went to played DDR. Hahaha, met Shuchun! I MISS HER, OH MY! Knew her through tuition, so nice, she know Tifflin too. Hahaha. Bought wine! Hahah, drink at the beach. TOOK A LOT OF PHOTOS. Haha, but photos are with Tifflin, she haven't upload yet(why am i not surprise). Haha. Reached home at 12.30. Showered & continued with my hongkong drama! HAHAH. Slept at 2, was too tired.

TODAY I WOKE UP AT 1PLUS. I COULD HAVE SLEPT LONGER IF THOSE PEOPLE DID NOT SPAM MY NOTIFICATIONS IN FACEBOOK. THEY COMMENT LIKE MORE THAN 100COMMENTS FOR TWO PHOTOOS. My phone kept ringing. Argh. Ate lunch & got ready for tuition. Hahah, reach tuition, Noreen & i was so engross in talking. Hahah. Then Kayxi started with drawing a smiley face. I wanted to draw eyebrown, but it turned to look like a hair! So Kayxi & me started laughing & i keep adding on some more hair. HAHAHA. & we continued till its like that.

Cute not! The one in blue i draw, the one in black Kayxi draw one. Hahah.
Had a veryveryvery long talk with Noreen. Screamed at her becos she doesn't wanna listen when she's in the wrong path. Talked to her about facts, about life, about us being a student & etc. Noreen, i really hope you decide the right choice for yourself. You're a student, remember that. Love you always.

After tuition, went to City Plaza with Noreen. Wanted to buy earring for tuition teacher, however, didnt. Dont know why, but yeah. HAHAHA. Went to Shop & Save to buy ice-cream, but don't have the flavour. So went to SingPost, go FairPrice to buy. Hahah. THATS MY DAYYYYYYY.

Imperfection.

2010-09-09T18:32:00.005+08:00

Becos of you(not referring to any specific person), I've missed out a lot things in my life. Even those little things which are important.

Looking through my past entries of this blog, thewayof-life.blogspot, i found out I've changed quite a lot. Character, personality, maturity, looks, attitude, the way i type & etc. When i was in Sec 1, I'm just a girl who do not know the reasons of life. I'm just a girl who is ignorant. I'm just a girl who just live my life with a smile. & thats why everyone call me laughing buddha. I was in 102. 102 was really a great class, yes, there's people like me that complained about coming into this school becos of the teachers, the friends & of course, the facilities of the school. However, we just tend to forgot those moments that we laughed tgt. & thats how we live our every days in 2008. 2008 was a chance for students to get into express. & yes, there were people from 102 went to express & i really miss those people. Bernadette, Azida, Nikita, Farisah & many more. :) When we get to sit down with those people who went to express, we just tend to talk about the times when we're in 102. Not becos thats the only time we're tgt, thats becos those memories are just too awesome. & we will start to miss those times. 102 was a class that is not very co-operative. We do not listen to the chair person & when someone wants to help in in all events, we will start saying about the person acting big. We cry becos we find faults with each other. We laughed becos we embarrass ourselves. We hugged becos we know we will be separated. Those times were the times i treasure the most, that i will remember the most. & i was really childish to get into fights with my friends. It made everyone go through a very hard time, however we made it, becos we had each other in the end.

2009, was a normal year, a streaming year, but still deserved to be remembered. Was still in 202. I made new friends, had new cliques. They were awesome. We had stupid fights, we had stupid comments about each other, however, we still love each other. 2009, every single day i spend with, is with the same person. I don't mind spending every single day with her, becos she's my bestest friend, & she was always there when i needed her. She gave me her shoulder, she gave me her support, she gave me her love, she gave me her time, she gave me almost everything. It was just a year, meant for her & me. My results was splendid, never gotten such a good results. My teachers were all awesome. Our class, uncontrollable, noisy, talkative, rude, but we still think that our class is the best. & i will always remember that.

2010, had new classmates, new friends. But friends still stayed, clique still remain tgt. :) New class, 302, but no big changes. Had surprises on 10 April. Lost her on 29 June. Cried over it, food-less for 5days, but its alright. I will take the good memories, leave the bad ones & treasure you as a normal friend now. We'll remain as friends, more joys should be discovered afterwards. :) Now, I'm just a girl who knows a lot about her own life. I'm a girl who knows whats bad & whats good. I'm a girl who knows who is good & who is bad to her. I'm a girl who knows whats bad for herself & whats best for herself. I'm a girl who knows how to show her love to her friends, to the people around her, be it strangers or pets. I'm a girl who knows how to think before doing something. I'm a girl who knows which matter is more important. I'm a girl who values her friendships with her friends even more. I'm a girl who treasures every moment with her friends. I'm a girl who knows how her life should be in the future. Now, i seem like i know everything about my life, about myself & about the people around me. I've chaned. I've grew to a true teenager. I may be very emotional over small stuffs, but i am not gaining sympathy, its just that the matter mean something to me. I understand more about myself & understand the things are happening. Through obstacles, i know i have something to learn from it, & i will change myself if required, & make sure the mistakes does not happen again. Through obstacles, i treasure everything more. Through obstacles, i will grow into someone stronger than how i used to be. :) & i have to say, i love the way i am now. Not becos I've lost you or lost something. Thats becos, I'm just better off this way. & there is no priorities in my life that i have to put first anymore.

Sometimes, we have to be alone. Becos there will not be anyone disturbing you. & sometimes, we just need our own time to think about situations & many other stuffs that are worth our time. But it doesn't have to be thinking. it can be doing. Like, doing homework. :) Today, no one was at home(relatives when shopping) & i had my own time. I studied. However, whenever i look at books full of words, i will just feel sleepy. So i turned on music, to the blast & i got everything into my head. The feeling was extremely nice to be alone, studying, feeling calm.

We are not doing ourselves justice when we reproach ourselves for feeling a certain way. Morol evaluation--the judgement as to whether something is good or bad--presupposes choice. And where there is no choice, there are no grounds for moral evaluation. For example, we may not like the law of gravity, but gravity in and of itself its neither good nor bad--it simple is. Similarly, we may not like feeling fear, but the feeling itself is neither good nor bad--it, too, simply is.

It is impossible to describe the pain that follows the loss of someone we loved. The person left behind mourn is often unable to contemplate life without the deceased. However, what happens next varies drastically among induviduals. Some people never recover from the loss. Others move on, after a period of grief, and are able to function as they did before, in terms of both their actions and their emotions.

"Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain."

Each time we experience sorrow, our capacity for joy increases.

Process of letting go comprises four stages: Accepting the reality of the loss, working through the pain of grief, adjusting to life without the person that means a lot to us, and moving on.
1st stage has to do with one of the common responses to loss, which is denial, either by refusing to come to temrs with the fact that the person is gone or by belittling the value of the relationship with the person who passed. For healthy recovery, the person who expeienced loss has to accept reality: both the fact that that person will not return and the true significance of the relationship with the person.
2nd stage is working through the pain of grief. Rather than controlling our emotions, pulling themselves tgt, or being rough, we are better off going through the emotions, feeling the pain when it natually arises, and then expressing it in words and tears. Those who experience loss are often distracted from their pain by well-meaning people who encourage them to stop crying over the person and get on with their lives.
3rd stage involves adjusting to the new reality.
Final stage, is to move on. :) Its difficult, but just move on. & you will find out that if you move on, you will feel different.

What did i do today? Study, sing, eat. :) Love my life.

Tmrw its Jolyn's party, meeting pig at kembangan. :) Haha, gonna bring my poloraid. Wearing the new dress i bought, haha. Yay. :D

When i see what i saw, i really just wanna just talk about her being so bitchy & whatsoever. Feeling a little anger, but i've thought, why should i EVEN get angry? I've told you you're just a friend to me, but why do i EVEN get angry & get sad. Ha, but nvm, i knew i should not & now i'm not. :) I find myself cool.

I don't have feelings for you. But when i found out stuffs about you, i felt jealous. I don't know how am i gonna sms you tmrw. Fml.

Everything will be the same.

2010-09-08T23:05:00.003+08:00

I just wanna cry my heads out.

I found out, its not becos you're tired of everything at that moment. You wasn't. You flare up it was becos you knew you had someone there for you, for sure, even you lose me. You found a new replacement. You found someone you can give your love more. You found someone you can give your time more. You found someone you can treasure more. You found someone, new, different from me, & you find her very unique. & that person there is making you turn to the other direction & thats why, we're like that. Just admit it that, you wasn't tired, you did it just becos you didn't want me anymore.

For that moment last night, at 12plus, i found out loads of stuffs that made me feel total 100% angry at that period of time. I wasn't feeling any sadness, not even 0.000000000001%. Afterwards, i felt bitterish in my heart & many questions start to revolve around my mind. Suddenly, i just said this. "I feel bitter. Why?" However, i did not put my brain into the situation & think about it. All i do was to distract myself with various stuffs. & at that moment again, i was just so strong that i thought i could just let go of it & live my life like how it is. & the next day, i realise, i can't. I'm still living my life in the past, & its hard for myself to step out from the past & live in the present. It just seems like you have to jump over a river with many crocodiles. It applies to me too, i need a lot of support & courage so i am able to step out of the box I'm still thinking & living. & if once i step out of the box, it will be the biggest step i made in life, & i will feel so accomplished.

I saw a lot of stuffs whenever i surf the net. Be it blogs, facebook, tumblr, msn & etc. I will see a lot of unwanted stuffs that after i see it, i HOPE i never saw it. Becos when i see it, i don't feel good at all. I feel angry & of course, sad. Have you ever go through when you're sad & angry, you cannot do anything? Not even throwing pillows, not even eating ice-cream or junks just to make yourself feel better? You could just only stay calm, & feel all those emotions in your heart, & not anywhere else. Its really hard to just stuff everything in your heart. As for my heart, it is just a very tiny balloon. When the little balloon is filled with air, & you, trying to pump more air in, air will be compressed & at that moment, the little balloon can still take it. However, if you continue pumping air into the balloon, it will just burst. My heart is just like the little balloon. I can keep everything in my heart, but if i come across more stuffs to keep things in my heart, i will burst & breakdown. You will see me crying so badly. Thats the moment when i'm hurt, deeply.

I guess, i still have to live my life, without you. You're just a experience that i have to to through in my life. & maybe, the experience is just a benifit to me. Letting you go, maybe there's a lot of good things gonna happen in my life? I shouldn't even bother if you're with her a not, i shouldn't even FEEL anything about it. I SHOULDN'T.

Once again, enough of all those sad stories. :)
Yesterday, can be said as AWESOME. Hahah, i'll rate it 8/10. Firstly, my alram kept ringing but i thought it was some music! Hahah, it was kinda funny though. Prepared & left house. Once again, I'm late & Amanda is early, or maybe to be good, ON TIME. Hahah. Ate pepper lunch, woooo. Hahaha, Jolene came late becos she had to go to her grandma's house. & before that she sms me saying that she will be a little late. So i was like, a little only. If its more than little, i'll kiss her. Look at her mean reply. :/

Talked a little, & left. Went to library, ahhh, so many people. So they decided, once again, to come to my house. Hahah, i went out for like fun plus i wear until so nice! :X Haha, kidding la. :) & i didn't study a single shit. Sigh, howhowhow.

I wearing my husband clothes. Hahah, & i told them i look like i just had sex! HAHAHA.

Then went down to the swimming pool to take photos. Hahah, Jill was just literally blur. She just stood there becos got water. :S LOL. So she didn't manage to take photos with us.

Jolene's spasm face! Becos of the sun. Hahah.

Amanda Baby Pie. :D

Jolene laughing ass! Hahah.

I LOVE AMANDAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. :D

Amanda asked me to do some Lucifer stuffs. Haha, i turned out a bit... WEIRD...

I found out Amanda like to hold my hand! Hahah. xD
After that, went up, ORDERED PIZZAHUT! HAHAHA, OMG, I THINK I GREW 5KG LOH. :( So sad. I need to on diet. Like seriouslyyyyyy.

Then we studied a little, we decided to go City Plaza! LOLLOL. OMGGGGGGG. I WENT TO SHOP. WOOOO. Love it love it love it. But i only bought a shoe! $32. Kill me for spending money. :/ Oh, i wore my husband's clothes out. & everyone is telling me,"Jaime, you look like you not wearing anything eh! & can you pull down your FBT?! You look like you wearing underwear." Hahaha, & as for my character, i didn't bother. I just walked out like nobody business. :) Xiaoqing meet me at City Plaza. AHHHHHHHHH. MISS HER MISS HER! :D

There's this lady gave us lollipop. Say she have a lot. Beginning its nice. Eat too long, too sweet. But for me, its ok. Hahaha.

Look at me, do i look like i just had sex? :D While walking Amanda say Jolene & Me is the mean one. Then my sister was like,"Jolene Min what. Of course mean la.'' lol, i swear its fucking lame!
Went home, Jolene & Amanda left. Xiaoqing took poloraids. Hahah.

Then she wants to drink bubbletea. Me, being so nice, i went with her all the way to Parkway just to buy bubbletea. Hahah. Then had dinner, everyone didn't have the mood to eat anymoreeee becos of the bubbletea. It was just really damn fillinng. Hahah. Watched tv then have to go down burn paper for the last day of Ghost Festival. HAHAHA, LAST DAY. OH YEAH. :) Then showered. Noreen came! AHHH, MY BAOBEO DARL! She showered, then we all went crazy. TOOK PHOTOS. :)

Then we was surfing net, walao eh, argh, pissed. But nvm. We decided to cook instant noodles. :) Hahaha! SO WE COOK.

Hahah, sister stole some. :) Then she wanna take photo with us.

Eat finish, its time to wash up! :D

Sister took this. THEN WE I TOOK PHOTO OF MY BED. :D

Then we was laughing so badly, stacking each other. We slept at like 3plus. I swear Noreen very hard to sleep with!!!!!!!! Becos we on the fan & also turn the air-con to 16degree. Hahah, she was freezing. I slept in the middle. So Noreen moved to me so not that cold, i didn't have space i move. Then Noreen move! OMGGGG. Then i wake up, i look. Xiaoqing is falling off the bed. I said,"Noreen ah, move there." Noreen say back,"VERY COLD!!!!" Hahah, halfway through, we off the air con. Lol, was literally turning to ice cubes! :( Woke up at like 11plus. Showered, eat lunch & rushed to school.

Choir was mainly theory. Tell us how to sing better & etc. Was so sleepy. :/ Couldn't stand properly, keep wanting to just fall off.

Choir end at 4, then had Math. Went to classroom, go through surds. :D Hahah, I GOT ALL THE ANSWER. Mr Pang told me NOT BAD AH. HAHAHA YAY. WAS SO HAPPYYYYYYYYYYYY. Afterwards, Mr Pang talked to me till like quite long. Reached home, eat dinner. I IMMEDIATELY SLEPT FROM 7-10. I'm just too tired that i breakdown. Really. Just have too much things to handle, this year. Sigh.

Alright, shall end here. BYE. :) More photos in facebook!

Bye. :/

2010-09-06T22:50:00.005+08:00

Yes, i believe that something happens for a reason. Its just like us getting to know each other. & there is a reason for us to know each other. Yes, to bring happiness to each other's life. Yes, to let both of us learn something in life. Yes, to know that there's wonderful friends like you in this world. I've never suspect before those good reasons. & i always suspect the happenings for the bad reasons. Thats weird right? Since we have a problem now, & once again, there's a reason for it. Yes, it made me stronger. Yes, it made me become so cruel now. & the last reason is, to know HOW STRONG WE ARE TO ABLE TO PULL THROUGH THIS TOGETHER. But, it just seems like, we're not strong enough to go through this.

What..? I don't want to face the fact that I'm happy? Who in this world will not want to be happy? I WANT TO BE HAPPY. & if now i have the chance to be real happy, i will hold on to the chance to be real happy & will not let it slip off my hand. Its so stupid of me if i let the chance of being happy to just slip off. Sometimes you, thinking i'm happy, but have you thought why you thought it that way? Probably becos you haven accept the fact that i'm dropping this issue & continue on with my life. & you havev accept the fact that i am gonna start a new life, without you.

Human beings are just so odd. They can say it so easily to others, however, when it comes to them to do it, its just extremely hard. Its just like my friends asking me to let go, & they even say,"I know its not easy." they know its not easy, however, they just EXPECT me to have immediate effect, immediate action. They just don't understand how hard it is.

Alright, enough of sad stuffs. Shall go on to happy stuffs. (:

End up, didn't go starhub becos there wasn't any stock for iPhone 4. & i also told daddy i want the white one, so i shall just get it when the white one is out. :) Daddy changed my plan, i can surf the net anywhere now. Hahah, becos my bill exploded cos of the net. HAHAH. & my sms-es. :/ Sigh! Hahaha,

I did not study much today, becos i fall asleep, again! OMG, whats wrong with me & sleeping. "Sleep! Do you love me so much?! I don't love you! GO AWAY FROM ME!" Argh, & i found out something, my mind is not cleared. Its totally not, becos i'm still bloody distracted, whats wrong with me! AHHHH.

Tmrw xiaoqing gonna stayover at my house, yay! GONNA HAVE A CRAZY NIGHT. :D Hahah, can't wait. But before that, gonna have lunch with my baby pie & laughing ass, which is Amanda & Jolene. HAHAHA. Then Jill meet us at library. Study till from 12.30-5, then go parkway with Amanda buy dinner for her parents, then... Go City Plaza with Jolene, go home & give a hug to my crazy darl, xiaoqing! :) HEE.

Talked to Amanda in msn. Lol, something paiseh happened to me. She say she gonna go study le, meet me at traffic light at 11.30. I thought she was saying later, then i was like huh?! WHAT! Hahah, after knowing its tmrw, paiseh ttm. Look at our conver!

HAHA, STUPID ME.

Had a long talk with Geraldine, she really made me made up my choice what to do & i guess what she say is right. (: So...

My life still carries on, & I WILL put on the smile i always put. There are many things in life for me to look forward to, i can't always stay on this dull track, its wasting my time. This friendship is stagnant already. Our friendship tgt may just be an experience in our life. I'm just gonna take the good memories, & leave the bad ones, & move on. I have to be cruel to myself even how much i don't want it. Bye beautiful friendship. We're just normal now. Like really normal.

I've never felt so sad & hurt before, however, i've never felt so strong & brave before too. So i guess, both of it exchanges. Give me a bad one, but in exchange, a good one for me.

I can stand up with my two feets now. :)

2010-09-05T20:25:00.005+08:00

If you asked me back, without hesitation, i would definitely go back to you. I told her i had the urge to go back to you, her answer, also without hesitation was NO. I told her the reason why, i told her how i was feeling, but her answer is still NO. She insisted, a only NO. I told her, if i wanna let go, i cannot let the memories manipulate me. If not, i would not bear to let go. I was really low at that moment, knowing that everyone doesn't want me to go back to you & i shouldn't go back to you, but my heart just wants to run to you, & let it belong to you even the whole world is against with the choice. Becos all i want is/was you. & you never notice that.

Do you think i won't want to message you? I want, but i can't. The more i message you, the more its harder for me to let go of you. You sms-ing me & me not replying your message just becos there isn't much to reply, is that the usual me the way i treat you? No, even there's nothing to reply, i will still reply you, without fail. But now, i just DID not reply you. You said you're still waiting for my messages everyday, i'm glad to hear that. Really. :) But i still have to say, I enjoy sms-ing you.

I'm thinking why have i been so tired so lately. Hahah, & what i love to do now is to sleep. I think these September Holiday i just gonna sleep if i have the chance to! Today i slept from 5pm-8pm. Hahah, almost everyone knows i'm sleeping. Therefore, when i didnt reply their messages, they didn't message me again. Lol, sweet ah them! :)

Went to church today, since Jonathan invited me. Hahah. Yesterday slept at 2am, thus i really had a hard time dragging myself to the toilet at 9.50am. :( I almost fall asleep while showering. Look at my closet to think what to wear, left house in a rush since bus 40 was coming. Hahah, slowly walked to primary school. Walked to the church with Jonathan. As Jonathan's mum was once my Primary 4 form teacher & teaches me almost all the subjects, i felt a bit awkward. Hahaha. However, Mrs Tam still caught me! Hahah, she is the BEST teacher. I love her, she always make cert to encourage students. :) I got 4 from her. Hahahah! Cool right. The church had to sing & etc, wow, i don't know whats going on. Wanted to sleep. Hahah. Was feeling cold, the gentleman Jonathan pass me his jacket. After all those prayings & etc, THEY INTROUDUCED ME! I HAD TO STAND. Oh my! They was like saying,"Today there's a new person invited by Jonathan. Her name is Jing Wen." AHHH, I WAS DAMN PAISEH LA. Hmm! Had lunch there, then went to 7-11. :) Went for class, had to read bible. Hahaha, the teacher keep praying for me. Sweet of him. :D Hahah, the room was freezing. & everyone was cold, yet Jonathan still being so nice to lend me his jacket not wanting it back. Hmmm, not bad. Oh, Ryan Poon was there too. HAHAH, he is forever crazy over "sumsang". -.- Oh my!

Then Jonathan went parkway with me like for fun, then took bus to sing post to look for Noreen. Hahah, talked & laughed. :) Noreen & me went hyper. I think Jonathan was paiseh for a moment with us. Not bad la. Went home around 4plus, bathed & slept all the way till 8. HAHAHAHA, SHIOK.

Now talking to Denise in ooVoo. :D We're like acting drama-ish. HAHAHAH. Like baby here baby there! HAHAHA, LOVE HER.

Look at our drama-mama talks!

Tmrw daddy gonna bring me to starhub! OH YES. Means i will get new stuffs. :D EVEN IM NOT GONNA GET IT, IM SURE I CAN PERSUADE. But if daddy is ready to get me iPhone 4 tmrw, i may reject. (: Becos i always want a chio white phone. So i shall wait for iPhone 4 white colour. HAHAHAHA.

Daddy was funny just now!
Daddy: Ey, mummy call got ask about me not?
Jaime & Eileen: NO? ONLY ASK ABOUT US. :D
Daddy: Oh... Okay.
Eileen: WHY? Jealous ah?

Daddy: NO?!
HAHAHA, Daddy ah Daddy, jealous, then say la, don't act like its nothing that mummy did not ask about you. Hahah, cute la.

AHHHHHH, he asked me for stead. Lol, what~ I'm not ready for any boyfriends now. LIKE, STUDIES IS MY FIRST NOW. I think i gonna... THINK ABOUT IT. (:

I shall list out my plans for September Holidays! :D Hahah. Look.
Monday
After going starhub, shall study Geog, Lit & do 30 minutes of Math. :)
Tuesday
Not sure if Xiaoqing & Noreen is coming my house to stayover. :) If they are, then i'm sure we will have loads of funs in the night. Go library studying with Amanda, not sure if Jolene is tagging along. However, before studying, we gonna eat FISH. :D Heehee.
Wednesday
Eat lunch with Sandra & Jolyn, then head to school for choir. 1pm to 4pm is choir time, afterwards, gonna stay in school. Mr Pang gonna teach me math, with Jolene & other people from my clique.
Thursday
Noreen coming my house & we gonna study the whole day! :)
Friday
My darl Jolyn's party, & Friday is break day too, so it shall be alright. Not gonna study!
Saturday
Gonna study before tuition, then head to tuition.
Sunday
1-3 tuition, i think, tuition end, STUDY. :D
Haha, thats my plan. :) I think i'm not distracted by anything now, except about having a boyfriend not. SO YEAH. Hahah.

I've been kissing my sister recently! I kissed her just now, & she was like,"I feel like i'm being rape!" Hahah, & she was trying to get away from me till she was sweating like shit. Sister & me have been irritating each other. Hahah, & now we always talk, gossip & etc. I love it! :D Hahah.

HAHAHA, I SPAMMED KAYXI'S WALL. & SHE LIKED ALL. Hmm, quite a nice full notifications from her. :)

Its 1.17am now & my eyes are still wide open for dont know what reason. My hands are still moving for the computer & phone too, hahah, at least there's people still awake with me. :) LOL, i think i need to sleep soon becos tmrw i have to wake up early to go starhub. Bye peepes. :)

Avoiding.

2010-09-03T19:39:00.008+08:00

This is how i try to be happy everyday. :)

Hoho, there's actually nothing much for me to blog about. I'm just probably too bored that i have to type something, somewhere, & therefore it shall be here. Haha. So actually, you guys can choose not to read this post.

HAPPY SWEET 16 JILL. Hope you like the card i gave you even though its kinda childish in all ways. xD But i really put in effort to do the card as my art sucks really ttc. I had hard time drawing the block letters cos i suck in drawing block letters. Plus all those colourings, was really tiring. & becos of the card, i stayed up till 12plus. Be honoured Jill. :) We've been sms-ing more than a month everyday, hm, kinda surprised becos i don't usually sms people everyday as i get bored becos there won't be any topics to talk about. & you coming out with topics just to let the convo flow, its really hard ah. Hahah. Love ya, & enjoy your day!

Today is the last day of term 3. & we have a 1week break. However, all teachers say its not a break for us. & i know it myself that, its not a break for me too. Its a study break for me. That one week i really have to buck up in my studies & make sure nothing distract my attention. So therefore, this few days, i gonna clear my mind & get ready to study. :)

Gonna meet up friends to study together. & Wednesday after choir, gonna meet Mr Pang to teach us Math. :) HAHAH. Tuesday MAYBE going library to study with amanda. & Thursday Noreen coming my house to study. So i guess, i gonna study one whole week. :D JIAYOU PEOPLE!

Lol, today i see so many stuffs that i hate to see. & so nice, one its in the morning, & the last one its after school! Wow, that really bright up the starting of my day & end of my day. But I'm surprised that i wasn't feeling as sad as i am actually feeling.

Today's lessons are so boring, felt like dying. OH MY. The time just feels like its not even moving, the second hand always stays, the minute hand always stays, the hour hand always stays. :( Today is the last day of school, & it sucksssssss. D:

Got back result slip. Wasn't as bad as i expected. :) I only failed combine humans which is like Social Studies & Geog. I hate Social Studies, i like Geog. WHY MUST THEY COMBINE THESE TWO TGT! ARGH. My class position is... 22. Hahah, comments by Ms Nadira was awesome. :) HMMMM~ She wrote this,"Jaime displays an eagerness to improve. She handles tasks assigned with care & sensitivity." Hahah not bad. Ms Nadira love to find me to do stuffs! Like collecting large amount of money for the KC Carnival ticket. Hahah. My comments from teachers are always good, & thats a good thing k! :D

Oh, yesterday had choir. New conductor, named Terrence Toh. Hmm, his quite ok? I still prefer Mr Qiu though. Hahah, shouldn't say why, but yeah. :) Mr Toh made us sing last minute songs, even made us sing our last year's SYF piece. Omg, it sounded like, oh gosh~ Hahah. He gonna do audition to know our voice range. :) I am used to audition actually. Every year, choir members have to undergo this. So, i was like, ahhh, whats new. :S However, Mr Toh had to leave like 4plus. He asked the leaders to audition us instead, however, next next lesson he still gonna audition us again. I reached till high high high G which means high high high "So". Wow, i didn't know i can go up till so high. Compliment myself, I'm the highest in Sop 1, which means probably, the whole choir. Hahah, cool. While others audition-ing, dawn was literally kissing me which makes me run around. Cheryl & Stephanie was using my marker drawing on the board! Hmm! LOOK AT US! :D

Hahahaha!

Alison the good girl. :D

Auditioning.

I swim with Joelle today. :) Lol, the water was making me shiver. Couldn't swim any longer, went up like after 30minute. It was just too cold!

Omg, i watched "just for laughs"! IT MADE ME LAUGH TILL I TEAR. ITS JUST SO FUNNY. Hahaha, i literally was lying on my cousin. Laugh till no strength. HAHAHAHA. Their reaction & everything is just so hilarious! Omg!

Talking to Kayxi in msn now. Lol, she typed wrongly & i purposely keep disturbing with it. Hahah, she wanted to say she smell the nicest. She type,"I smell the smelliest."

Hahah, she so funny. HAHAHA.

Tmrw there's tuition, sighhhh. I don't feel like attending though. But no choice, i have to. ;)

SEBASTIAN LOOK LIKE THIS WHEN HE IS P6. Now, a total ah beng. But he look nicer & cooler now. HAHAHA. :D

& i find out that primary school guys never fail to ask this. "Do you have stead now?" LOL. Like every guys ask all the girls. Thats so cool!

You wasnt silly last time, but now you are. Becos you chose her not me, & that makes you silly in everyone's eye. Becos she had totally, BRAINWASHED you yet you don't know & you find that its alright. & i am not gonna care abt it anymore. :)

bye!

Mummy, it's over.

2010-09-01T22:02:00.008+08:00

JONATHAN SAID WE'LL SMS OVER 4K SMSES. BOTH OF OUR BILL GONNA EXPLODE! :D We'll see! Stupid him asking Windon how was it to sms me 3k smses so he would be prepared. Asshole. But he said sms-ing me was a happy thing, hmm, shall forgive him. :P

Yes, i know what I'm hoping for. :) Which is, a new life.

Yesterday it was teacher's day. & yeah, there's no lessons at all. :) & thats what a student always want. Hahaha. Had acer dance. The tuvalu dance. Haha, its quite awesome i can say. The teachers danced too! Haha, i think the person who can see & is the tallest is Lim Kay Xi lo. Claudia piggyback her. Lol.

Changed into blouse, & walked to the hall for mass. Omg, boring boring. Was sitting with Kayxi. Lol, both of us literally falling asleep. Hahah, & she scare me when i open my eyes. She stare at me, i jumped. Hahah, wth right. Then so many stupid things happen la! Oh, one thing i shall talk about is. Becos whenever Kayxi covers my mouth, i'll tend to lick her hand. & she find it itchy, haha, so she remember, she take my hand & do it to me! OMG, ITCHY! AHHHH. Then she keep licking me, my whole hand was her saliva. :( Ewww. So both of us plan that i do to XingWen, Kayxi do to Amanda. Hahah, we succeeded! :) Amanda did to Tifflin, & Tifflin was disgusted! HAHA. After the mass, was recess. OH YES OH YES OH YES. :D Ate with Kayxi, Rae & Coral. :) Kayxi licked Rae's hand. I licked Coral's hand! HAHAHA. Funny ttm. Coral wipe my saliva on Rae. & Rae wipe Kayxi's saliva on herself! HAHA. Didn't have the mood to eat becos of my mouth, its hurting. :( Hurhur. After eating, took photos!

Kayxi's twist pose! :D

Spastic pose.

My stupid irritating face that Kayxi says. :)

Can see my curly hair! HAHA. :D

My friends are awesome!

Xingwen baby!

Amanda, my cute pie! Haha! My face there so nice! HAHA. :X

:)

Bern, my past best friend that was once in 102! She went to express, ahh! Still love her as much as i always do.

Denise act cool!

Kayxi! My bestest bestest friend. :) MOHOHO.
Hugged Ms Nadira! :) Omg, damn nice. Nisa hug until cry. I found out, Ms Nadira is a nice teacher. I love her so much, she love our class so much. Omg, so gonna pass my English to make her happy. :)

Went back to the hall, for teacher's day celebration! ALL THE PERFORMANCES ARE AWESOME. Brought camera along, so Jolene, Kayxi & me kept taking photos. :) We sat at the front too! We took photos of the performances too! Lameeeee. Kayxi, her fellow friends & me kept shouting "azidaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!" & Nikita laughed while playing the guitar when she saw me! Whenever she see me, shé'll laugh. Thats so funny. Hmm. Photos time!!!!

Our dimples! :D

Darlings! :D

LOVES! :D

Jolene, nonsense partner! :)

Without fail, Kayxi & me always do the same face unknowingly. :)

After school, went to parkway with Sonia & Xingwen to have lunch. :) Ate pastamania! Couldn't eat finish cos of my mouth, again. Totally ruin everything! Left quite a lot of pasta.

Hahah. Walked around & meet Fiona at parkway bus stop at 3.

Started laughing when i see her & she gave me that "what i do?!" face! Stupid her! Walked to Tanjong Katong Primary since Windon, Weishi, Sebastian & Denise were there. Haha, the whether was so hot! I started singing last minute songs about the whether. Fiona stopped walking without me knowing. Turned around & saw her standing farfar from me! :( She say i am a retarded. Worse of all, she say,"You never change at all. All you know is to laugh!" Lol, i never change meh! Got loh, ahemahem. Reached Tanjong Katong Primary, saw all of them, omg, awkward ttm! HAHA. Kept quiet. Xiaoqing darl smsed & told me she outside school le, i ran to her & hugged her! HAHAHA, I MISS HER! However, Fiona hugged her first. :/ Talked while walking to Katong Shopping Centre to meet Adrian! Stupid Sebastian step on my shoe, argh! Saw Adrian, hahah! He is damn nonsense as ever that will never fail to make me laugh! His stupid face, his stupid character. & when he do something, i'll laugh! & everyone there, start to say this tgt. "Jaime! YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE. ONLY KNOW HOW TO LAUGH! EVEN THE LAUGHTER IS THE SAME AS EVER." When all of them said that, i kept quiet for a moment, & i start bursting out laughing again! Hahahah! Funny funny. Saw sister! Ran to her, & my bag drop. Paiseh ttm! Everyone laughed at me, even sister's friend! OMG. Weishi kept asking us to take photos, so we did. Hahah.

The old place that we always hang out! :)

As they were taking their time to decide where to go, i was thinking if i should go home & change. Lol, end up, i did. :) Oh, was talking about who same class & about primary school life. Anyway, their first place was to go Vivo. Haha, however, Fiona couldn't go, so they thought of Parkway which is like, omg no. So i don't know where the hell they're going, i just went home with Xiaoqing. Hahah, Xiaoqing was talking about our stayovers. Funny stuffs started to flow & made both of us stop & laugh so badly. Hahaha. Miss those times! :D Showered & get prepared, Adrian called & told us that they're going Marina Sqaure to watch movie. Movie is Step Up. Haha, nice one fellows!
On the way to Marina Square. :D

Our ugly pose! xD

First thing we do there was to EAT. Haha, Xiaoqing & me didn't eat becos we're still full, for whatever reasons we have. Hahah, so we just stare at them eat. Sebastian went to put GARLIC in Weishi's pasta! & Weishi claiming that was Ham. Hahah, & they even put garlic in Weishi's sugercane! Omg, so poor thing. Weishi drank & said,"Why spicy spicy one? Sugercane like that one eh?" Everyone started laughing, yet she has no idea whats going on. Haha, cute only. The boys keep bullying her like making her straw flat & she has to go to the stall many times just to get straws! Hahah, the guys impressed me. They can make a sound out of the straw just by flicking it, omg! Cool. & i was so amazed by it, the freaking irritating Adrian copy my face! Lol, make me laugh only!

Sebastian trying to be glam! There's more picture of him, however, i'm lazy to upload it!

Adrian act "chio"!

After eating, went to the cinema. Oh my god, it was damn cold. Everyone was freezing, even the boys! Shared my "husband" jacket with Sebastian, cheh. What kind of guy is he! My jacket was big enough to cover two people. Haha, Xiaoqing was cold till she keep going up & down trying ways to warm herself. Can just say, everyone was literally turning to ice cubes! HAHAHAHAHA. :D The front part of Step Up was boring that i felt like sleeping. I fall asleep on Sebast's shoulder! HAHA, PAISEH.

After the show, went out & think of where to go. Took photos! :D

My new boyfriend! :) Hahahah!
.

KIDDING. :)

Actually decided to play bowling, went in, & came out becos didnt have the mood to play after all! Went to the roof top, it was so dark! Omg, lol, then we start talking about primary school life. It was just awesome with those boys, being so childish. Hahah, & the teacher's that always scold the same group of people which is us. Ms Leong using the long ruler to beat us, boys going into girl's toilet. Girls going into boy's toilet. Skipping chinese class, going 7-11 & without fail, late for supplymentary. Throwing wet tissues to our Chinese teacher. Hahah, those playful moments really made my day so wonderful. :)

Around 9, Windon & Adrian went off. Left Weishi, JingYi, Xiaoqing, Sebast, Denise & myself. ;) Hahah, was literally daydreaming.

Soon, around 10plus, Weishi & Denise went off. Which means, Xiaoqing, Jingyi, Sebastian & myself were at the rooftop talking rubbish. Suddenly, Xiaoqing saw something. I saw too, Jingyi, Xiaoqing & me got freaked out! HAHAH, I WAS LITERALLY GRABBING SEBASTIAN'S HAND TIGHT! JingYi & Xiaoqing clinged together. We immediately left the place walking two by two around 11plus. Went home after that. Sebastian knew i was still in the stage of fright, he offered to go home with me. Oh yay, gentlemen sia him. Changed changed. :) HAHAH. Sebastian stayed at my house till 1am plus. Lollol, he gonna go club. -.-

Tuesday was a awesome day man, did not regret going out with primary school friends. :) The boys actually cheered me up after knowing that they were tgt. The boys not knowing i was upset, their nonsense just never stop to bring laughters to the convo. I really miss those times in primary school. I really miss mix school. Sometimes i wonder, will it be better if i transfer school out when i was Sec 1 which my parents allow. & i think my answer is.. Yes. Look at me now, pathetic loser without a single shit. :) However, its alright, i'll find what is right for me, one day, soon.

I did something really wrong on Tuesday. I have no idea what was i doing. Why didn't i stop it?! Why did i allow it? Omg, becos i allow it, now I'm thinking about it & worrying what if that happens. Oh gosh. Now, only 3 people know about this & the amount of people shall not increase anymore. If not, soon, the whole school know, my parents know, they'll kill me. Sigh, i must be crazy at that moment...

Today, i went to NK to do treatment! :) Woke up damn early, at like 9. STUPID JOLYN MAKE THE APPOINTMENT SO EARLY. Jolyn curled her hair. :) My mother signed loads of package in NK, therefore whatever i do its like, free of charge. :) Shiok. Jolyn have curly hair now! HAHAH.

Reached home like around 3plus, was damn freaking tired becos i slept late last night, i slept for 3h. I woke up at 6plus. Hahah, shiok. Watched tv, fight with my sister & sms my primary school friends all day long. :) ITS ACTUALLY FUN TO SMS THE BOYS. Haha, full of craps.

Alright, i shall go off now! BYE. :)

Liar liar pants on fire.

2010-08-30T20:40:00.004+08:00

I want someone to play "merry-go-round" with me! :( When will i ever have one since I've lost you, when last time you play it with me even you'll find it giddyyyyyy.

You're a liar. A total liar. :) You're a liar, you're a flirt, you're a bitch, you're a fucking holy mother, you made me cry when i found out "that" from my friends. Omg, what i get from you is all these retributions uh? You think its so fun to do that? You thinks so, then one day, i hope it happens on you, & make sure you know how i feel you bitch.

Today's lesson is so fun. :) The time feels like it's so fast. Omg, its cool when you enjoy your day in school, its just so wonderful!

Lol, today she walked pass the class, Jolyn Phoen,"OIE!!!!!" & everyone turned when i was like,"EY, THE FISH IS HERE THE FISH IS HERE!" All those people around me turned. & Noreen turned too becos i shouted,"NOREEN! FISH FISH FISH!!!!!" Hahaha, cool man. Everyone hates you two, oh my! :(

Ms Nadira's lesson was awesome. I had the mood to pay attention, so i wrote loads of notes on my paper. Cool only loh, now i look at my paper i so happy. I look like some hardworking girl(i bet my friends read this, they will be like "ahemahem"! Mean people). & Ms Nadira was so disappointed in her form class. Haha. Cos exams are coming, yet 13people plus never pass up homework. She said about many teachers complain about our class, very naughty, noisy, never pay attention, keep passing notes. Lol. Omg, i didn't 302 is that bad!!!!!!! :D Anwyays, Ms Nadira said out some of the notes that our class people wrote.
"I want to find a boyfriend. I want him so much. I gonna wait for him since he gonna break up with his girlfriend!"
Hahah, these topic is so damn freaking funny. I started laughing my ass out!

Chemistry lesson was fun ttm too! FOR THE FIRST TIME ITS FUN! :D You know why its fun, when Mr Lim call the person name, the people beside them have to stand instead. Who stand up the slowest, have to answer the question. HAHAHA, THERE'S SO MANY FUNNY REACTIONS WHEN PEOPLE GOT A SHOCK. & Jolyn Phoen's reaction was damn funny. She was like asking Mr Lim to call whoever whoever. Mr Lim suddenly called Mirei, Jolyn was beside her, everyone beside Mirei stand, but not Jolyn. She was like,"HUH?! WHAT! OMG! SHIT!" & the whole class laughed, even Jolyn herself was laughing till her face was red. Haahaha!

Jill was funny. Cos i vandalise Jill's chair by using liquid paper. Afterwards, i use pen to write.
Jill: Don't use pen, very ugly!
Jaime: As ugly as you??? :D
Jill: Tsk!
HAHAHAHAH, HER FACE WAS DAMN FUNNY.

I was damn fucking piss during geog! Mrs Siva never come, so had to go down to the canteen. That freaking man in the dress picked on me. I never even talk she ask me to move.
Men in the dress: This girl, sit here. *points to table*
I turned to Jolene & say,"Knn, never even talk ask me to move."
Men in the dress: What did you say?!
Jaime: What?! I never even talk to you, i talking to her la. Cheh.
I moved to the table she pointed, throw my stuffs & stare into space. That freaking men in the dress, still stared at me!
Men in the dress: Not that table, this table!
Jaime: WHAT?! You said this table loh, walao.
Men in the dress: I pointed to this table, not that!
Jaime: AIYAH, ALSO NO USE POINTING. NO SENSE OF DIRECTIONS. -.-
Omg, she bloody ruin my mood man. Cb.

When the school is ending, Jolyn was still sleeping. The bell rang, she suddenly wake up & ask,"WHAT LESSON ARE WE HAVING NOW?!?!?!!?!!!" I looked at her & said,"GO HOME JOLYN GO HOME!!!!!" HAHAHA, omg! She damn blur. Jolyn said back,"OMG, TODAY SO FAST! HAHA, I THOUGHT STILL GOT WHAT LESSON EH!"

After school, went to Amanda's house first to get her stuffs. Afterwards, went parkway with Jolene, Jill & Amanda. :D Ate Mac! OH YAY. Haha, then sister came. She is a bit retarded today, her wire connect wrong today. So irritated by her! Hahaha, but she's still my darling sister that understands & loves me a lot! :D Hee!

Went to the library, studied. Omg, i just couldn't at all. My eyelid was so heavy, i slept! HAHAHA, COOL ONLY. :D

Yesterday night, Noreen totally make me go high that i couldn't sleep! She called me, then we started talking about boliao stuffs. She asked me to on my laptop so i can show her the cute dress i bought. So i did! Then we started copying poses from people we hate. If you see the pictures, & you find the poses so familiar, probably i'm talking about you. :) Haha, don't get offended kayzxzx!

Ms Nadira's pose! HAHA!

It amazea me when that someone treasures me so much when i only know that person less than a year. It amazea me when that someone love me so much when i only know that person less than a year. However, it amazea me even more that you can just leave me, not care about me, don't love me, don't treasure me when i know you more than 2 years. Ha. I guess this is how fair the world is.

2010-08-29T21:29:00.004+08:00

I shall forget the love you've given me, becos you've found someone that had replaced me. & it's not worth it for me, to continue & hoping that you'll come back to me one day, knowing the one day will never come true. Next time, hope that we'll have more topics & happiness when we talk. :) Our journey still continues, but not really fantastic.

Yay, daddy gave me allowance already. :) $350. So happy, shall bank in all the money tmrw before i spend it on clothes & boliao stuffs. Shall only use $50, for one month! Cannot use the rest, i must save up! Save up for shoppings, SS3 & presents for my darling friendssss. :D They're like the awesome people in my life. They never fail to not bring me down when i tell them stuffs. They always find ways to make me happy, always on my side but not the other party. Thet're just so wonderful that i don't mind kissing them again & again!

I have piles of homework to complete, yet, i havent complete any. :( Oh gosh, am i gonna be dead? I have 3 exercises of Math homework, Geog worksheet, 2 chapters of Chinese Xi Zi, Social Studies essay, Lit essay & English proposal! OH GOSH. Kill me right now, faster! Haha, shall burn the midnight oil, again~

Today had tuition, lol, i didn't pay attention, sad case! :( Haha, was just too engrossed using phone. & keep talking rubbish with Xingwen & Noreen! HAHAHAHAH. After tuition, went swimming. OH YES! Swimming, again! :) Hahah, was playing like shit. Hahah.

My dinner is PizzaHut! :D OH YAY. Just had PizzaHut yesterday, but i ate PizzaHut today again! HAHAHAHAHA. Cool right. Was full after eating so much of foods.

Bought app from iTunes! :D YAY, NOW I GOT SO MUCH APPS FOR TAKING WONDERFUL PHOTOS. & there's games that i've been want for ages. Heehee. ^^ Spent like $22 for the apps.

Something happened when daddy, sister & me was sitting down together to eat fruits. Sister was showing me this facial product that she got for free. My father's phone rang, he talked & he slide down his phone cooly.
Jaime: Daddy, you very act cool eh.
Eileen: HAHAHAHAHA! YA LO YA LO!
*something fly off*
Guess whats the thing. The facial product.
*after 10sec*
*Daddy burst out laughing*
*Sister & i looked at each other & laughed badly*
Daddy: Whats the thing that flew off?!!
*Sister & me still laughing*
Sister: The facial product!!!!!
Daddy: OH, I THOUGHT THE FRUITS FLY OFF.
Jaime: Wow, if is fruits still never scold still can laugh ah! FUNNY!
HAHAHA, JOKE OF THE DAY MAN. :D

Oh my, i miss a lot of people & stuffs now. :( It's making me feeling so low & tired. Haha, but i guess i'll be fine tmrw? Hmmm~

Shall go do my homework, bye pals. :)

Omg.

2010-08-28T21:22:00.004+08:00

Spamming people's blogs, facebook or whatever is a totally childish way to speak out how you think & a childish way to say what you wanna get across. & spamming is a method that i use in don't know what century. Therefore, let me get this straight to you. I did not write anything in your blog. Becos i'm not childish. & secondly, i have my own blog that i can just write anything about you or whoever, why do i still take the time to type the website. It's your choice if you wanna belive what i say, i've said my piece, the rest its up to you.

I don't need your pressence now, i need your love, care, attention, hug. If having you by my side, but not having your heart with me, then why do i still keep you by my side?

Whatever alright.

Today i shopped. Yes, shopped. SHOPPED. :D So happy. Woke up at like 10plus just to study before going out. :) Amanda came my house before meeting the rest of them. We somehow rubbished. Haha. Before meeting the rest, we went to PizzaHut to take a grab! :) Ate cheesyshrooms. Oh yay, missed that! Forgot to mention, my sister went with me too. Yeah. :) 2plus went to Paya Lebar MRT to train down to Aljunied. & the place where we wanna shop was near Paya Lebar. Thanks man Tifflin Tan Ting Ting. Make us waste a trip only loh. Reached the destination, wow. A lot of people eh. Need to qeeue too. The weather is so hot! Kept sweating, oh gosh. Took pictures. :)

Over-shot the time! 4.19 i was still shopping when my tuition is at 4.15! Omg, i cabbed down. Poor Kayxi was standing outside waiting for me! Hahah, but she was looking at the results of other people. Whatt.. HAHAH. Went toilet, haha, told her that i covered my nose while peeing! & she told me about the incident she covered her nose too. Started laughing, haha! Tuition, cannot really concentrate. Was distracted by shopping. So Kayxi, Noreen, & two other sec 1 girl started laughing & talking about random stuffs. Lol. Shall not talk much about tuition though there's quite a lot to talk about, lazy to blog for now. :X

Rushed to City Plaza, continued shopping! Bought a damn cute half-dress! OMG, I LOVE IT. :) SO GONNA WEAR IT. HAHAHA. Rushed home for dinner. Why is my life rushing instead of enjoying every moment! AISH. :(

I'm trying out clothes i buy today, yay-ism. :) Tmrw there's tuition again, oh my gosh. Shall pay attention.

Saying out what i've been saying, really feels so much better. At least, i clarify with you. However, deep inside, there's so much things i still wanna say, & i have the courage to. I'm just afraid its the wrong move again. Ha.

Geraldine! NICE TWEETS. :D
"Walao. Nowadays 13yr olds r true Lians alr! Speak like one, dress like one, blog like one, look like one, is one. Tsk tsk. Worse than my batch leh hehehehe. It's okay. Not my juniors can alr. Ew" BOOK ALL OF THEM MAN GERALDINE. GO!!!!!!! :D

Whatever.

2010-08-27T20:50:00.004+08:00

Today wasn't really a nice day. I feel like i am in my own world. I feel like i pay attention in class today, however, when it comes to doing it, working on it, applying what I've learnt, i will tend to stun & forget everything. I don't know whats wrong with me recently, & i just found out, it seems like something is distracting me. I'm not sure what is the thing that is distracting me, & i don't wanna know becos i also think i know what is the thing that is distracting. (Get that messy feeling?!) I think i am living in a world, full of lies & comforts.

Since psychologist state that doing exercises will make your day better, i swam. Swam like 10laps only & i couldn't continue on becos its kinda late already. Had to eat dinner as it was like 6.43pm? & also, i was still sick, so i had to go back home. I couldn't swim properly becos my nose is blocked & i have a lot of phlegm now.

My relatives came, as usual. My niece, Tracia have problems in saying like most of the words. So i corrected her. She say her own name as "Kracia". & it sounds like "cashier". HAHAHA. She say "St Patrick" as "Paquick". She say "very" as "bery". WHAT. I started laughing, even she laughed at herself.

I found out families sometimes are always the one that cheers you up even they don't know that you're sad. But all they want us is to be happy everyday. I helped Tracia & Joelle to shower today. Yes, Tracia is only 7 & Joelle is only 2. They are ignorant, but becos of their ignorant, they're so innocent. They do stupid stuffs that makes people laugh not knowing what they do cheers people up. Their reaction towards some matters are just so cute that you just wanna kiss them. This two little kids, made me continue living my day with a smile. Felt so bad scolding them just becos they irritate me & i think i was PMS-ing.

Daddy & Mummy have been treating me nice since i told them about hospital thing. Ha. Good or bad, i'm not sureeeeeeeee.

Went Parkway today with cousin & sister. Nothing much happened, just had to chase after JOELLE LIM JIA XI. & she's getting naughty every week i see her. I just feel like killing her sometimes! ARGH!

Oh, i didn't went to the doctor today. Becos my cough isn't as bad as yesterday already. :)

Tmrw i'm going shopping before tuition. SPEND MONEY AGAIN. OMG, WHAT'S WRONG WITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :(

There's nothing to say actually, for now. If there's anymore, i'll edit. Bye.

Accepting emotions.

2010-08-26T21:22:00.004+08:00

I am so tired. I am mentally tired & physically tired. Mentally tired becos i repeatedly tell myself the same thing over again & again when its not even fucking true. & its pulling my hopes down about everything. However, i still gonna say, I'm alright. :) & i am gonna be alright. Physically tired becos i am so tired of coughing so hard & so many times but my throat is still irritating me. In class i kept coughing coughing coughing, in the bus, i don't dare to cough, i have to bear with it. When i have to get to sleep, i cannot sleep becos of my cough. Take for example, yesterday night i got onto bed at 12.30am. I only managed to sleep at 1.30am. OMG, ONE FREAKING HOUR. Then the next morning, i just have to drag myself to the toilet.

Anyway, something funny happened in A Math class. :) Jolene asked Tifflin this,"TIFFLIN! YOU GOING GEYLANG TODAY?" Everyone laughed. But what Jolene meant was "Tifflin, you going to your geylang house today." The whole class laughed like shit.

Since it was like 2h of A Math class, Mr Pang gave us a break. Omg, had some violent fights with Sonia, Jill, Dinisha, Jolene & Noreen. Becos Jill has been wanting to touch my dimple since ages. When i allow Jill to touch it, Sonia don't let Jill touch it. So its like the violence start from Jill, Sonia & me. Then, Dinisha purposely touch my dimple. Jill was like,"WHY DINISHA TOUCH EARLIER THAN ME!!!!" So Dinisha was involved. Everyone was helping me. Hahah, they don't want Jill to touch my dimple, Jill held me so tight, they push Jill away but Jill still hold on to me. Finally, i got out of the violence! & the poor Noreen got into the fight becos she was standing there. Worse still was, her leg ah, sexy ah. HAHAH. However, in the end, i let Jill my dimple. Hahaha.

Choir! Omg, choir really lack of discipline man. Even not being a committee member, i am burning inside. They just don't wanna shut their fucking mouth. Whats there to talk uh. Talk so much. Walao eh. I couldn't sing still, becos i will tend to cough so badly every second. Everyone was like,"Are you ok?" Hahaha, i cough until i tear. Lol, so stupid. Choir ended early! Yay, went home immediately.

I reach home, i sleep again eh! Hahah, so shiok. But like for a while only.

I am currently doing A Math homework. I don't know a shit about it. & i am so stress over it that i can just cry. My engine for exams is starting to on. :) & i am gonna study starting from Saturday. Studies shall be the first now.

DADDY INSISTED ME TO GO SEE A DOCTOR BECOS I AM SICK FOR 5DAYS. :/ I don't like to go see doctor becos i have to eat medicine! & i have to request fluid instead of tablets becos i cannot swallow. Aiyah, then so paiseh. D:

Tmrw i cannot go hospital take the test also. Becos not feeling well cannot take the test, ah, waste time nia.

Shall talk about some life education. Mostly, for myself. But if you people reading thinks its right, it may be a advise. :) Hahaha!

Experiences in the past two months, taught me to suppress my emotions, to hide my pain. It took me days to unlearn this harmful habit and give myself the permission to feel, the permission to human. My most significant psychological breakthrough came when i realized-truly internalized the notion--that it was all right for me to be sad, that there was nothing wrong with feeling dispirited, scared, lonely, or anxious. That simple realization, that is was OK to feel.
Let your feelings flow.
Social ties would not hold---communities, families, and relationships would fall apart--if our emotions were always exposed. We have all at some time felt a primal emotion, be it envy, anger, desire toward a friend, which, if revealed, would have endangered our relationship with that person. We have all in our imagination violated some of the commandments that hold society tgt, lusted after our neighbour's partner, felt angry, enough to hurt someone. We know how to control our emotions in public--a necessity in order to survive, let alone thrive, in the world. But as with most human interventions in nature, there are also side effects to suppressing our true feelings.
While it's at times necessary to keep certain emotions out of sight(when we are with others), it may be harmful to try to keep them out of mind(when we are alone). We are taught that it is improper to display our anxiety or to cry in public, so we hold our emotions back in private as well. Anger does not win us friends, and over time we lost our ability to express and experience anger altogether. We extinguish our anxiety, fear, and rage for the sake of being pleasant and easy to get along with-- and in the process of getting others to accept us, we reject ourselves. Denying ourselves the permission to acknowledge and truly experience "undesirable" emotions is detrimental to our well-being and an obstacle to becoming an Optimalist.

Suppressing emotions.
If you truly wanted to stop thinking of something, you would be better off allowing yourself to think of one and then after a while, the thought would naturally go away--just as every thought eventually does. The attempt to actively suppress a thought, to fight it and block it, keeps it fresh and intense. Similarly, emotions such as anxiety, anger, or envy intensify when we try to suppress them, when we try to fight them and block their natural flow. An Optimalist understands that and allows himself to experience painful emotions, knowing that by doing so these emotions are likely to weaken and fade away.

Acceptance.
When we fully accept reality--the good and the bad, the pleasurable and the painful--we can create and spread affluence; when we accept rather than resist, we become a pipeline, a conduit, through which wisdom and goodness can flow.

Healing the Pain.
If we inject water into a clogged pipeline, the pressure will increase a great deal more than if the water is allowed to flow freely through a clear pipeline; similarly, if we allow painful emotions to flow through us naturally, freely, the pressure eases and they eventually subside. A continuous buildup of unreleased painful feelings can lead to emotional breakdown.
Instead of denying the pain and fighting it, we accept it; rather than condemning ourselves for feeling anxious, we accept their anxiety and allow it to flow through us and take its course.

We are all born with innate abilities to heal ourselves. We are able to fight off germs, to repair broken bones, to grow new skin. In order to heal physically, we need to give the natural healer in us the time it needs to do its work. We have a similar mechanism to heal psychological injuries. But in addition to time, psychological healing requires that we shift our attention to our emotional pain and keep it there.

Bear with it. I can.

The another day.

2010-08-25T21:34:00.006+08:00

It's another day of my life. It's so irritating when the lessons are boring, i wanna sleep, the teacher ask me to sit up straight. I had PC today, don't know what Mr Tan was talking about. Some sex stuffs which i am not interested at all. Surprisingly it didn't turn me on. Haha. Then i decided to sleep, Ms Nadira asked me to wake up. :( ARGH.

My sister is irritating me now. But we're just somehow bonding, in a way. She's trying out clothes & she's asking me if she looks better. All i did was, look & turn. Until just now, she asked again. I replied back,"AIYAH, JUST TAKE IT OFF LA!" Hahah, my sister laughed, for don't know what reason. & she said i was mean. Haha, & now, she's so engross in watching tv now. Hahah.

My house is only filled with sister & me. Hahah, usual thing. :) Mummy & Daddy is not at home. Oh yay. Freedom~! When i reach home, i just put down my bag, lie on the sofa & went into my beautiful dreamland until my sister wake me up for dinner when i just sleep for like 15minutes! PISS ONLY.

My sister just said something bad to me.
Eileen: Jaime Jaime! Very nice hor? You can wear it, becos you very fat. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
*Me staring at my sister giving that "fuck you" face*
Eileen: Are you glad to have a sister like me?

*Me, keeping quiet*
Eileen: EY! NICE NICE NICE? :D
Jaime: AIYAH, DON'T DISTURB ME!
*Eileen looking down at her nails, giving me a sad face that makes me feel guilty. ASS.

Noreen Lau Yu Ling did not come to school today. AHH, SHE ABANDON ME. Make me collect all her books. Sms-ed her in class. SHE IS SO CRAZY.

After school, was thinking if should go structured lesson not. END UP, I DIDN'T. & THERE ISN'T STRUCTURED LESSON AT ALL. So Jolene, Jill, Amanda, Xingwen, Leona, Gloria, Tifflin & me lingered in class. They molested me. :( They lift up my pinafore just to see what panty i wear. A bit weird to say it here, but i don't really care. Haha. They're still talking about last year i was writing on the board, they lift up my pinafore & i was wearing a cartoon panty! & since then, they called me "Panty girl". Having such friends, really brings joys into your life. :) Hahah, love them man. As for Amanda & Xingwen, they're dancing SHINee Lucifer. They got real high. Hahah!

Amanda, very pretty. :) Xingwen, ahh, my baobei. Hahah.

Amanda was angry becos i said her! HAHAH.

Jolene got a shock when i wanna kiss her & she ran away. :( Felt so hurt. HAHAHA.

JILL WANTS TO TOUCH MY DIMPLE. HAHAHA, THEN WHEN I FINALLY LET HER TOUCH IT, SONIA DON'T LET HER TOUCH MY DIMPLE. Haha, so both of them was literally snatching for me. & they touched my sensitive part which is my neck, i shouted & laughed. Both of them stun there & give me that big eye. Hahaha! & i don't know why Sonia keep laughing at me during Math class. She laughed so badly till she snored. WOW. I'm still thinking what did i do. Hmmm~

Choir was a total bore. Mrs Lim told us that our NEW conductor will only come next Thursday. & we're suppose to sing 5songs for the conductor becos the conductor wanna hear. Hmm, ok, so the whole choir was like half dead. No one had the mood to sing. As for me, i couldn't sing becos i will just go out of tune badly. Even i talk, i cannot even control the tune & i just go out of pitch that Jolene laughed at me so badly. Omg, this is so embarrassing. I find that attending choir now, its a total waste of time. Next year choir syf, i think we'll just get a bronze. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT. A GOLD CHOIR IS DROPPING TO BRONZE CHOIR. WOW. Our hard work, our senior's hard work went into the drain! Sigh!

After choir, was with Gloria, Alicia & Jill. Was waiting for Xingwen. Hahah. Gloria, Alicia & Jill just got crazy in one of game in iPhone which is called "Impossible". Their IQ really fail so badly. Gloria kept making me scream by "vomiting" at me when she found out i am scared of vomits. & i kept laughing becos we suddenly talked about Sec 1! HAHA, STUPID US. NOW, WE'RE SO MUCH MATURE. :D

This is Gloria's wallet. When i look at it, i was like.. "WHAT LANGUAGE IS THIS??" So i started reading out. MAKE ME LAUGH ONLY. You all shall try reading it. :)

Talked to Amanda in msn. SHE BETRAY SUPER JUNIOR. SHE IS NOT GOING FOR SS3! She said she will go. SHE WILL. So i act like i was angry but i actually wasn't even angry. Hahah. Then she complained about her cough, saying I'M THE ONE WHO PASSED IT TO HER. No one asked her to share Cookies & Cream with me... :X Hahah!

I acted like i wasn't the one who passed it to her! HAHAHA. Kinda stupid.

Anyway, i feel so sleepy now. But i feel bad not studying. So, i think i gonna burn the midnight oil to study. :) Haha, i am such a good girl that everyone agrees! HAHAHA. :)

Just have to bear with it. Bear with it. Bear with it. Bear with it. Bear with it. Bear with it. Bear with it. Bear with it. Ha.

Its just something that i have to do it constantly. Sooner, it will be a habit. & I'm sure it CAN be a habit. Don't give up! AHHHHH. Fml. -.-

BYE!

I am getting over it.

2010-08-24T18:10:00.004+08:00

YOU'VE NEVER BEEN A BURDEN TO ME DEAR. I LOVE YOU, WHY WOULD YOU BE A BURDEN?

It sucks to be sick. Especially, when it comes with a flu, sore throat & a cough, like how it's happening to me. My voice changed to the max, very sexy, & i love it. & midnight when you're in your deep sleep, you just suddenly cough becos your throat irritates you & you cough so badly till you start to tear, spasm of vomiting, sweat furiously & you can't sleep back. & having a flu, makes you breathless. My health, without having a flu, i am already breathless due to some reasons, add on to flu, i can just die due to lack of oxygen. Sore throat sucks becos when you swallow something, it will just hurt, ttm. & a fever?! Makes me looks like a zombie. -.- Becos when i have a fever, i just wanna die. Hahah. & its sucks the most to get sick when the person you want to care about you so much isn't there caring & bringing you to see the doctor. :) Thats the worse thing. Please go & get that experience.

Today something stupid happened to Noreen. She somehow fell down the stairs. Jill, Sonia, Tifflin & me started laughing not knowing she was crying. However, when i know she's crying, i'm still laughing becos Noreen & i always talk about "What if i fall?". Thats why i started laughing so badly that everyone pushed me to the side & laugh first. Lol! Noreen, i didn't mean it alright. :) I love you. Hahah, but its just so funny. Noreen somehow sprained her ankle or something. However, she started laughing too when she was crying so badly. Funny only.

I know I'm nothing to you, i know everything. I don't even mean a single shit to you now. As least, we're still friends right? At least, please acknowledge me. We've been friends for 2years. We've been bestest bestest friend that almost everyone in the school know. Yes, now we're over, but at least, acknowledge me. You don't have to be scared when you see me seeing you & her together. Becos that really don't matter to me anymore. We've been normal friends now. A normal friend that just says "Hi" & "Bye" to each other when we see other. & i chose being a normal friend then being strangers. Becos... You just have to think back the pass two years. You've been there for me, you've loved me, you've cared for me, you've been with me & many more. We can always continue being friends, than being a stranger. These few days, I've thought if we should start a new friendship or just a normal friendship. I asked you yesterday, & if you want a new friendship, you would have at least notice me. But you just didn't care. So i ASSUME you just wanna be normal friends.

I think i am just getting over it. I am accepting it. I am just letting go of the matter. Becos I'm just too tired. You're tired. Everyone's tired. Ha. Since the three of us, none of us wanna give in one step, i SHALL give in. :) I have my own life to go too, i cannot always cling onto this & not continue carrying on with it. I've been just too silly. Really, for the past two months, for the past few days.

However, i have to confess something. I really don't want us to be normal friends, i don't even want to end it & I really don't like what i seen today. When i saw both of you together walking out the school gate together, guess what i do. Despite of the fever, despite of the knee hurting, i ran up & look at both of you walking. I realised... a lot a lot of stuffs. Its just too much to be written, its just too much that i don't bother typing out letters by letters. Becos of what i see, i got real angry, not feeling anything else. Just plain angry. Also, becos of what i see, i decided to let go. & by letting go of it, its once again, becos of you. I don't know why am i doing stuffs, becos of you. I'm just used to it already. Letting it go, you may be even happier. You may not be so stressed out. You may not be pressurized every single day. You don't have to be scared of anything! Doing all this, i've never thought for myself. Not a single shit about myself. All i think is, you you you you you. How great can i be? But i still suck, i still lost to her. Becos i'm just too mentally weak & i really cannot undergo all this again.

Haha, sometimes i am just really thickskin. & for don't know how many times, i gonna be thickskin. :) Hmm~ I just wonder how great i am sometimes. I wonder if she can ever win me in that. I don't think so though? I let you wipe your face, your sweat & your tears with my blouse. I don't complain as long as you're feeling better. I wonder if she can ever come out with a last minute song just to cheer you up. I wonder how long can she last with you telling her how pain it is, & etc. I wonder if she can ever sacrifice so many stuffs even though its a disadvantage to her. I wonder loads of stuffs. She may have different ways to handle these stuffs, but i still dare to say, she can never be as good as me. :) If she is trying to do all these to be like me, ha, its all fake man. :) Trust me. I don't know if she will ever comment about what i write, but... I'm just saying whatever that is coming out from my heart.

In class(Jill, Sonia, Tifflin, Noreen & me) really got into like a situation that we just wanna scold some people.

All these words, i've never seen it before. & seriously, i don't know what the hell does it mean. I don't think quite a lot of people know the meaning. Its like omg, why are you using this languages?! All these languages its for like typical ahlian la?

There's something i still cannot figure out. Which is. You tell me, you want to be with your friends. Ya, ok? Then why are you sticking to her..? Like, okay? She's the friendS when there's like only ONE human being? If you just don't want me, you want her, you can just tell me you know. You don't have to come out with all those excuses just to let me walk away from you. I don't need lies, i need the truth.

& one thing i am still angry over is.. She is talking about me lah. Yet, you believer her friend that she's not talking about me. WHAT?! I've not said anything for the past few months even though she said me, i kept quiet. Until she keep continue on with it, I HAVE MY LIMITS, of course i say. & me keeping quiet, i got a scolding instead of a praise. She got protected instead a scolding. WHAT LOGIC IS THIS.

I just deleted one whole bunch of word. Ha.

You said you dont wanna break either of our heart. However, you managed to protect one, & broke the other. Ha.

This post means: Let's just be best friend from the start. Now, i only your reply.

For now, lets look back & remember the memories for the last time. :)

The frog factory & many many factories we went. That period of time, we was so awkward to take photos. Now, we can just take unglamly. :)

This was the time before Mid-Autumn Festival last year. We suddenly went high & get all different stuffs & put on us. Even bra. Just look like how cool we are. :)

KC Family day. In the mornining we just started to took photos. & thats all we do. & afterwards, we still rushed to tuition. Haha.

We're suppose to study in library. But remember we ended up playing spider boxing? Then we saw the swing opposite the library, we went to play with it.

We played with plasters. Becos of my house chopstick, you scratched your forehead & i started laughing. So we came out with the idea, putting plasters on the forehead. & also the neck for fun!

Took photos just becos we had the mood too.

All those poloriads. We played with shower cap becos you find it cool. Remember the ice cream biscuit? :) We bought 5boxes & ate all.

E Awards! we bought shades from Rubi. & i asked you to wear it despite its night time just to take photo.

Before bowling, we went to my house & took photos with our cool watch! Haha.

The surprise party, was awesome. Very awesome. The best birthday gift you've given me, Staying over at my house for two days & many things happen. Its unforgettable.

Work attachment. ZOO. AHHHH, it was tiring. But after seeing you, i got more energy.

Tuition time, we can just take photos randomly. :)

The lastest photo we took. It will be the last photo before the new friendship start. :) Loves.

I didn't eat dinner, oh yay. On diet. :)

2010-08-22T16:19:00.006+08:00

Firstly I wanna say how cool is it that I am blogging with iPhone. Haha, now, I am actually trying to stop crying. Lifting my head & letting the tears go back. However, it's too much that it is flowing from my side of my eyes. But, I still gotta say this! I AM FINE. :) even I'm not, I gotta be fine. This matter can't bring me down so much, soon, it'll be fine, right? Time heals the wound! The cut in my heart, will be healed! It will.

It seems like I've finally made up my mind. I made up my mind. Finally, after
2months of hurts & pain. I decided to stop the hurt that I am getting & she is getting everyday. & to stop it, it is to let go. I should have been ready for it since the day I begin my friendship with anyone. So why am I still getting so affected by it? That's probably called. The power of love. Lol, I am rubbishing now. :S wow, my tears finally stopped flowing down from my eyes & I feel so better after crying out soooooooooo much!

I admit I'm still sad, i admit i don't feel any happiness at all if i let go of the friendship, i admit i can just breakdown anytime, i admit i do not want to let go of the friendship even you are suffering, i admit that i still want you by my side, i admit that i am selfish, i admit that i don't want to continue the journey without you. But, i just can't bear to see you so sad every single day, so tired every single day & living in fear everyday. Since the day you said we was fine, i know it won't be fine at all. & yes, its correct, its not fine. However, i thought by not saying anything, just let it be natural everything will soon be back to normal. The answer back to me is NO. I have to do something to stop hurting you. To stop it was just to let go of you.

You're online now, i kept clicking on your name. The conversation appeared right in front of my eyes. Thinking if i should talk to you not, however, through many attemps, i still closed it. I dont know what should i do now. I feel so lost, confused, vexed, sad & scared... I don't know why i am scared. Its just... I always say let you go, & you really leave me, i really wonder... How will the following days of my life will be? Thinking of it, just gives a shock, gives me a jump, gives me a drop of tear. Why is it like that..? I just deleted the comment i made on her status... Ha.

One week, full of joys, full of laughters, full of hugs, full of smiles, full of photos to capture the happiness. Is that enough, to end this friendship..? I'm afraid after enjoying it, i cannot accept the fact that thats the end of everything. I'm afraid of the every single moves i am making.

Today by not thinking of the emotions it had brought to me, i made myself to do lots of stuffs. Doing homework, playing games, sms many people, watch tv, fight with my sister, go shopping & eat. It occupies my mind & time to even go think about the emotions. However, i guess i have to face it.. Very soon..

The following posts will be full of memories & all of the past. So.. Its time for editing of photos & gather all of the photos. After that, i don't think there will be any to talk about unless the "one week" would happen.

I love you forever, & ever. If you need me anytime, i'll be there. :)

Words can't bring me down.

2010-08-21T20:56:00.003+08:00

From where I started to where I am today
The journey has been long & tiring
from nothing to some thing I am today
It’s not been an easy journey.

Tried with luck; Tried with hard work
Tried with destiny too
But nothing worked for me.
It’s not been an easy journey.

Found love but lost love too
Found friends but lost them too
Found money, even lost that one too
But the journey continued

Today I stand facing the world
It’s beckoning me to start all over again
While I miss my love
With whom I could start the journey again

I called up my love to join me again
In the journey of life that never concludes
Loser! ! She called me
The lesson of journey never concludes.

I want to move on without my love
Even without my friends & money
As life moves on; I move on with it
To a journey that never concludes

Walking alone on this path
With guts and determination
I want to continue the journey again
A journey where people would remember me
As the person who is the best

Firstly, i don't need your comments to continue living. I come into this world not to listen to your comments about me. & never comment about me, becos you ain't perfect.

Yes, i know we can't go back like last time. But there's always a way out of a situation, its just whether if you want it to happen or not. If you never want it to happen, the thing will never happen. But if you want it to happen, you will sure find ways to make it happen. Even your teacher says so. & the solution for the problem is. Lets start to know each other again. Becos now, you're different. I'm different too. We can always start a fresh new friendship. We may be even happier. I think this way will work things out, seriously. Now, its just up to you if you want it to happen not.

Since you've told you want this friendship still, i will still maintain this friendship no matter how hard it is. I will. I'm happy to hear that you still this friendship, really. That brighten my day. :)

There's actually nothing to write about, but i just feel like looking at this page & start thinking about what should i do about it. What is the best way. What is the best for everyone of us. I've tried to sit down, listen to songs in order to make me think how do i solve this hard problem. However, my brain just don't like it. My brain is once again controlling me. Lol. One day, i shall lock my room, turn the volume of the music to the blast, sit back & start thinking about it. & i shall only think about it for one day, & thats all. NO OTHER DAYS.

I just delete a whole big loads of comment after seeing what you wrote on your own web page. I'll stop commenting, i'll stop.

I shall stop here for the moment & continue on later becos i just can't write everything out properly. I'm so distracted.

I will still try.

2010-08-20T22:55:00.006+08:00

Just felt like posting this picture.
The bestest friend that i ever had, Lim Kay Xi. She's awesome. :D

I DON'T NEED YOU TO BE NICE. I'M NOTHING TO YOU, YOU'RE NOTHING TO ME TOO. SINCE IT IS, STOP CARING ABOUT ME BY WRITING BAD STUFFS ABOUT ME IN YOUR FUCKING BLOG. BECOS, THAT MAKES YOUR BLOG UGLY, YOU SHOULD KNOW. HA.

Smile tho' your heart is aching, smile even though it's breaking, when there are clouds in the sky- You'll get by, if you Smile through your pain and sorrow, smile and maybe tomorrow you'll see the sun come shining through- For you.
Light up your face with gladness, hide ev'ry trace of sadness, altho' a tear may be ever so near,
that's the time you must keep on trying, smile- What's the use of crying? You'll find that life is still worthwhile, if you just smile.
Smile tho' your heart is aching, smile even though it's breaking, when there are clouds in the sky- you'll get by, that's the time you must keep on trying, smile- What's the use of crying. You'll find that life is still worthwhile, if you just smile.

You said "rest". What does that means? Means we won't talk for days again like how it happened last two months? & rest, what are we suppose to do again? Think again? How long will it be again? When i saw the word "rest" before reading everything, i knew that something will not gonna be right. & yes, it's not right. I somehow regretted giving you the note, why did i even had the courage to write that? I should have just paid attention during lesson time. I thought things will turn out better, however, whenever i think it that way, it never never turn out good.

I knew it long ago that we will never be the same like how we was, however, i still continued comforting myself with lies & imagination thinking that one day we will be like how we was, one day we will, one day we will. & what Noreen said was totally true. She told me I'm wasting my time thinking it will happen, but even i know I'm wasting my time, I am still hoping that we'll be like how we was even no matter how many many many timessssssss you've told me that we can't, others bring me real down, but i'm still leaving in my dreamland, thinking & hoping, we'll be like how we was. Silly me. But probably, thats the real me. Becos i'm real stubborn, & you know it. Becos you used to call me that.

If one day, miracles happen, i would be so happy. & the miracles i'm talking about is this... One day, me crying in my room hardly, & suddenly there's a light shining. I lift up my head & see what it is, & at that moment i see Jesus. & Jesus tell me this,"Jaime, i'll give you one wish & i will grant it." Immediately, without hesitation i will definitely say," Let us be back like last time." & the next day, you telling me lets be back like last time. If that really happens, i would really tear. I know the miracle is a bit dramatic, but, thats what i dreamt yesterday night. Cool uh? Miracles come true, but not for me. & why is that so?

I've never thought that we'll end up so bitterly. I've never thought we'll end up so painfully. I've never thought we'll end up so sadly. Always, i'm very positive about us. & probably becos i'm too positive, when we end up so badly, it really got me strike down. I couldn't accpet the fact, i couldn't accept everything that was/is happening. Sometimes, i wonder being so naive is a good thing or bad thing?

Both of us are tired. I know you're extremely tired baby. I'm extremely tired too. I really hope one day if possible, your heart is fitted to my body & my heart is fitted to yours so we will be able to understand each other. Like this, we won't have any fights & clarifications too.

At this moment, excuse me girl, can you stop saying stuffs everywhere? You're just making things worse for youself. Why must you do all this unnecessary stuffs just to make yourself feel better & make me feel so much worst?! Today i just went to see a cyberbullying play, you know the caused of cyberbullying is so bad, which is suicide. If one day that happens to me, everyone will know is you. Seriously, stop. I've never begged someone that i don't know, but please... Stop hurting me with all your words. I've stopped, what else do you want? Leave her, no way.

Who have not felt jealous before in their entire life? Even a baby felt before. Its being said that when a baby's mother have a baby in the stomach, the baby will keep crying becos they know they gonna be replaced by the baby inside the stomach. Even a baby feel the jealousy, then for teenagers & adults, the jealousy is even much deeper. Jealousy can happen for different stuffs like work, love, studies, looks, popularity & many more. So I'm sure in this world, there's no such words as "plain jealous". Becos people get jealous for a reason, its just the other party wanna understand & know the feeling of it. Even me, i get jealous very easily. Don't tell me you have never gotten jealous before.

People always say after a heavy rain, the sun will shine brightly & it gonna be a good day. Hmm, the thing has been raining heavily for 2months, i wonder when will the sun shine from the dark clouds & it will be a good day for us, not for me only. Cos, you know i've never wanted to walk the journey alone.

You know that i need you so badly, why must you push me aside to other people? To me, you're different from the rest of the people in my life. Thats why i need you so much, thats why i'm willing to change, thats why i'm willing to undergo all those pains, thats why i'm willing to sacrifice even though you've asked me not to. You should know, i'll cry so badly if one day you really just turn & walk away from me & never come back to me again. YOU KNOW IT DEAR. You've known me for 2years plus. & you understands me more than anyone elses in this world. You understands me more than my families. You should know how muuch i need you. Do you still remember you had pain, i cried becos i was so afraid you will just leave me at that moment. & despite of the pain you had, you still got me up & hugged me & forcefully telling me you'll be fine. You won't leave me. At that moment you said that to me, i cried out so so soooo badly & if you remembered i said this,"I don't want anymore people to be important in my life again." You asked me why & i told you,"Becos its sad if that person leaves you..." You didn't say anything, but you just smiled & pat me while hugging me to calm me down. Since this happened, why do you still say i don't need you as much as last time? Why..? Till now, you have no idea how much you mean to me in my life? Let me tell you from my bottom of my heart, you mean almost in my life. Believe it or not, its up to you.

I don't know if you will ever read all this posts. If you read, i don't have anything to say. But if you have never read all these posts, then... I think, i'm just posting to lighten my heart.

I just want to get across to you what i have been yearning for.

Once again, I've cried for you again. I just cannot don't cry for you baby.

Happiness depend upon ourselves.

If you never know.

2010-08-19T22:07:00.009+08:00

You repeatedly telling me the same thing when i repeatedly ask you the same question to make sure what you say is true & does it still last. But it seems like everything is once again, a lie. Why do people like to lie so much at times for some stuffs? Just becos they think by saying a lie will not hurt the particular person?

Stop changing the info about her alright, its disgusting people out. You sound like you're a total lesbian you know. Wth lah. Come on, from my perspective, i don't think you can last long with her.

Today once again, I've brought up the courage to wrote you a note on how i feel. I may be selfish just to say how i feel, but if i still remember, the note, i said all i want is how you really feel & how you really wanna do. So i guess I'm not that selfish after all. You have never thought that telling how you really feel & what you really want will make a significant in your life & in my life. Like in this way, you'll be happier & more relax. You don't have to put on smiles & acts in front of me anymore. You won't be tired anymore too. Why not just do something that is really best for you? Love yourself more than you love others but not in a selfish way. You will find that you'll be so much happier, why not choose a better pathway than such torturous pathway?! I guess now whatever you tell me now, I'll be able to accept it & not brood over it so much. (I hope) & I'm sure that you're tired of me & tired of acting about everything. Right? I'm sorry for the troubles & sorrows I've brought into your life. I am really sorry, but all i know is, i still love you a lot.

I want back the real life of the memories that we had. I don't want what is happening to be the part of memories too. It isn't good at all. The time when we play, we laugh, we talk & etc. Its so fun, its so memorable that i just want it over again & again. We're always left alone, & becos of that, we talk about our stuffs, we do stuffs we enjoy doing & don't care about how others think. Those memories are just so wonderful, & i suppose it was to last forever, but now... No, the memories has ended. Just like that.

I have a lot of wishes to make about us now, if one day, things are really out of my hand, i guess I'll hope the remaining 8 wishes you've gave me. & hope you'll grant it since you've promised it before.

Before bad stuffs like this happen, you've said so much sweet & nice things to me. You've promised so much things. The promises you've made doesn't seems like its still flowing. It seems like it had stopped flowing. There's no more light, there' no more wind, there's no more oxygen, there's no more heartbeat. This is how the promises had stopped. It's dead, & it can never be revived again unless you really thought it out & there's a miracle.

You probably have not felt before the pain that I'm undergoing. & i may probably have not feel before the pain that you're undergoing too. As for me, the pain i always undergo every single day is, seeing you & her together. But i just have to keep everything to myself, so you won't leave me, you won't find me ridiculous, you won't find me stupid, you won't find me so sensitive. I'm so afraid of how you think of me now, its not even suppose to be like this in the first place. I'm suppose to be who i am when I'm in front of you, becos you love the real me, not the fake me that I've been putting up in front of everybody, not only you. I always tell that someone that I'm not gonna care, i gonna lead a happy life no matter what happens. So that the someone won't find me stupid that why am i still thinking about it when she told me repeatedly,"Jaime, its not worth it. Seriously." Giving my advise yet i don't wanna listen. To that someone, if you know I'm talking about you, I'm sorry that i haven't been the real me in front of you when you're actually now the closest to me not including her.

You said in your personal website that you don't know what to do. You don't wanna break either of our hearts. I understand that. Its like your hand. The top side of your hand is your flesh, the bottom side of your hand is also your flesh. How can you bear to hurt any of it. & you sitting listlessly in the middle of your hand, don't know what to do. Suffering becos of both of us. I don't know if i should give in. I don't know if I'm doing it for your sake to help you make up your choice & stop all those sufferings that you're having every single day, or for my own sake to stop the pains & feelings. I need a adviser now, but i don't have anyone to turn to. Sometimes I've been thinking, when you start building up the relationship with her, why didn't you thought of the consequences which is what I will think, i will feel. How could you just forget about me when you start giving your love to her, giving your hugs to her, giving everything to her when in the past, you gave me everything. & only me, nobody else. But now, you're giving everything to her too. Becos of your innocence, becos you're so naive, you don't know anything about it, you didn't know things will turn out so sour, you never thought of anything & thats why it has ended up to be like that. I don't exactly blame you for what is actually happening.

I understand everything now. From the beginning, those things that are happening weren't so simple like abc. It's as complicated as Math. & becos of the complicate-ness, it keeps giving problems for us to solve just how Math give us headache to solve a sum for hours just to score that 4-6 marks. & afterwards, we solve everything correct, it will be reflect on our report cards. As for these things that is happening, we are encountering, how we solve it, it will be reflect on how we feel & how we gonna be next time. Strong or weak mentally. Positive or negative. All the things are related. So for the problems I'm encountering, i am gonna think carefully before i start the first move of the problem. Even the process may be so pain for the first move, but if thats the best for the situation, then why not. It was to be said that,"Seeing someone you love so badly to be happy, that brings you happiness too." If this sentence is true, I'll let go of it even i can't bear too. Becos, why not let a single party to suffer than three parties are suffering from all this problems?

I don't know having this problem is a good thing or bad thing.
Goods
I've became more sensible.
I've became more strong mentally.
I've became more mature.
I've became more clever in seeing the views of some situation.
Bad
I have to suffer from all the pains.
I have to let go of this wonderful relationship. (If this is the best option.)
I have to bear with my emotional.
I have to bear with my feelings.
I have to put on a act.
I feel so lost now. How i wish i can return back to my childhood days that there's nothing for me to worry about, nothing to think about. Just sleep, play & eat. Isn't that great. Whatever troubles, our parents shall handle it for us. We don't have to shower ourselves, we don't have to handle situations ourselves, we don't have to do anything. Why can't life be so great in teenage life & in adult life? I'm sure there's a purpose for it, but i can't find the purpose of it.

Whats the purpose of life when we live in this two face world. There's troubles passing each other everyday, there's sure someone saying bye to this world everyday, there's sure someone who fall sick everyday, there's sure someone who cries everyday, there's sure someone falling down everyday, there's sure someone getting scoldings everyday. there's sure someone breaking down becos of some matter & there's laws applying in our life everyday. We have to obey it, we have to avoid doing some stuffs & we have to do some stuffs. Is that the purpose of life? When i was age 7, i thought life was so simple. Just laugh everyday & thats the purpose of life. I don't even know why must girls come menstration. Yes, so we can give birth. But aren't there any other ways to give birth other than coming menstration. & yet, we have to undergo cramps everytime we come our menstration. Why must people in this world have illnesses that will say bye to this world? Why must people have illnesses that they have to do medication everyday, seeing them suffer? Thats the purpose of life? Where are all those good positive things of purpose in life? Or there isn't any at all?

Hmm, you gave me this song called "Anyone of us". Its so meaningful. & thats becos you did something wrong & thats why you wrote the lyrics of the song to me. & here is the lyrics.
I’ve been letting you down, down
Girl I know I’ve been such a fool
Giving in to temptation
When I should’ve played it cool
The situation got out of hand
I hope you understand
It can happen to..
Anyone of us, anyone you think of
Anyone can fall
Anyone can hurt someone they love
Hearts will break
’cause I made a stupid mistake
It can happen to..
Anyone of us, say you will forgive me
Anyone can fail
Say you will believe me
I can’t take my heart will break
’cause I made a stupid mistake
A stupid mistake
She was kind of exciting
A little crazy I should’ve known
She must have altered my senses
’cause I offered to walk her home
The situation got out of hand
I hope you understand
A stupid mistake
She means nothing to me
(nothing to me)
I swear every word is true
Don’t wanna lose you
Now, i wanna ask you & say this to you. I've did a mistake, anyone of us make mistakes, will you forgive me & let us be like last time? The situation got out of hand, i really hope you'll understand. & i swear whatever I've said to you from 29 June its true. Including this sentence, ''I don't wanna lose you.'' Anyone can hurt someone's heart they love, hearts will break, but I'm sorry. Can you give me the last chance?

This is probably the longest post that i wrote all my feelings down. Sorry for the emotions, but this is the only place i could write & turn to now.

I've never thought of wanting to leave anyone, especially you. But if you want it to be like that, i really need time to think. & if i really accept it, i hope we'll still be friends. Best friends that when you're sad you can turn to me..

For a moment, my heartbeat stopped. This made the whole entire world stop too. Leaving me alone, walking through this complicated life, without anyone to turn to now.

You're just so cool that you made everyone to be madly in love with you.

Change is a challenged.

2010-08-18T21:15:00.003+08:00

Sometimes, you have no idea whatever is happening is creating sadness to others. But you just seem so selfish & just do stuffs you want just becos that makes you happy. Why are you so selfish? I've did whatever i can do, but you just take it for granted. Then what else you want me to do? You said you'll try to get back like last time, till now, i don't know if you even tried or not. You've made me lost trust in your already, what more do you want?! He said to just let it be natural, i also just want it to be natural like how it was from 2008 till this year, 29th June. However, it seems like it will never gonna happen no matter how long i've wished for it. Do you still remember that you gave me 10wishes to make. Till now, i only made 2. If i ever ask you to fufil the other 8 wishes, can you still let it happen? Or it doesn't count anymore? Hah. I've told him, i've told her that i'll never want to cry for you again. But in the end, i still did. I've bear with the pain & tears for weeks. Thinking that i would be so strong to just go through this whole stupid shit. & yes, i'm just fucking so not strong that i've cried for you again k. How useless can i fucking be? When will it be a HABIT to see scenes i don't like & thinking its totally alright?! Yes, maybe i've did something wrong, but does that mean that i deserve all this treatment? Just becos of that, you wanna treat me like that?! Why can't you just TREASURE the changes I've made. Appreciate it & DON'T take it for granted. Just think about it, one day, you get all this back when you've sacrifice sooooooooo muchhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Did sooooooooooooo muchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. & what you get back is ALL THIS SHIT. Do you feel happy about it?! Won't you feel sad?! PISS.

It's just another day.

2010-08-14T21:35:00.003+08:00

Haha, another day pass again. & i didn't treasure the day i was given. Becos i woke up at 1plus going to 2plus in the afternoon. Had lunch, played with iPhone apps & went for tuition. Tuition, as usual, i am always daydreaming, playing, talking, laughing & etc. Went parkway to buy some sutffs with Noreen, then go City Plaza to shop for a while & go home. WOW! I did not even open up my books & get into serious business. I am wondering, when is my engine gonna start. I'm still asking myself when, i am still thinking for a answer for it, i am still suspecting if that will ever happen. Hmm.

Tmrw i shall really study study study study. Should not let anything distract me, including this damn shit laptop that is 24/7 in my room, on my table. Shall hide it! Haha, i'm kinda lame now. I feel like i am talking to myself now. Haha.

Had some talks with Noreen while walking home. We talked about life. Becos she told me that life is more complicated in teenage than in a adult life. I kept quiet for a while & thought about it. I answered,"You can make your life as easy as possible, its just the way you handle it, the way you think of it. You can actually stop thinking about what happened to make yourself better, make your day so much better, but you just can't. Becos your brain just want to to think about it. But people say that we control our brain, not brain control us. However, it just seems like our brain controls us." :)

LOL, WTF LA. JUS FOUND OUT SOMETHING THAT MAKE ME FUCKING PISS. Jill tell me June say something about me. & I AM BLOODY HELL PISS WITH HER FUCKING MOTHER BLOODY COMMENT. SHE SAY WHAT, I ACT BIG, I ACT CUTE, & IN MATH CLASS KNOW I TALK ABOUT HER. LOL, WHO ASK HER OFFEND ME & MY FRIENDS?!!! & like excuse me, i am naturally cute. & i don't act big too. :) & yes, i am fucking talking about you in math class. Is there fucking something wrong about talking about YOU in class? There isnt any school rule or political law that state "NO TALKING ABOUT JUNE". So, i should have my rights to talk about you in class right? Oh, June Lim, you're the one acting cute. HEAR YOUR VOICE MAN. ITS TOTALLY ACT ONE LA. & you eh, keep shouting, beat people, ACT UNTIL LIKE SO BIGGGGGG. SO YOU'RE LIKE SAYING ABOUT YOURSELF LA. WHAT A JOKE MAN YOU FUCKING UGLY MAMA. You're so fat. D: SO SAD.

Love. ♥

2010-08-13T21:13:00.004+08:00

I totally agree with the image above. :)
I guess everyone in this world actually do not know what is actually love & know how it feels even how much they've gone through.

Love, can be just a word, but, it has a lot of feelings in it, it goes through a lot of process, it changes our life, it changes the real us to someone different when in front of someone you love, it makes us feel happy, it makes us feel sad, it makes us feel secure, it makes us feel insecure, it makes us go haywire, & definitely, it makes you jealous ttm. A word "love" can actually make us feel so much & change so much. But what is actually the true meaning of love? & love actually gives us happiness or sorrows? Until now, i don't think anyone's answer is reliable to me.

At times, in a relationship, its better to tell the truth than telling lies just to avoid hurting the other party. However, the party telling lies, have no idea the impact of it when the other party finds out everything is just a lie from the beginning. Yes, i guess this is the only thing i agree from her, you're just too afraid to let either of us get hurt. & you'll never know, sometimes telling now is better than continue delaying. The longer it is, the greater the hurt. & you just probably don't know what exactly you want now. You're just letting it go with the flow, thinking its ok, but actually, its not at all.

Falling in love is not nice when the other party do not like you, being in love is nice, falling out of love is not nice. Its alternate. Cool or what.

I want to fall in love once again, but i'm afraid of the process of letting go of the relationship becos i'm afraid of getting hurt again, i'm afraid of crying again, i'm afraid of everything that WILL happen. I'm not being a coward, i'm just being too emotional & i'm just someone who actually believe the word love. & i'm just someone who is so stupid to believe that you, will not leave me & you will stay with me forever, loving the only me the most, in your life. Also, to get in love so deeply.

I may sound stupid now, but if you go through the process of "true love", you'll actually know how i feel.

In school, many funny things happen. Out of school, many funny things happen too. But i just dont seem to remember it now. :/ Hmm, haha. Each day(except Saturdays & Sundays), there will be the same routine happening to me. Wake up early, go school, study, talk, play, daydream, use computer, sleep. It may be boring doing things repeatedly, especially things you don't wanna do. But have you ever thought that, doing the same things everyday, same things happening everyday is better than knowing something bad & happening something bad? & i will choose the repeatedly activities than having good news for some days & bad news for some days. Becos, its the best choice, for me. :)
& therefore, i shall end my post here. Loves.

To be strong isn't easy.

2010-08-10T12:53:00.006+08:00

I found out i am always here, typing when i am feeling upset. & before i type, i will think of a lot of words & statements that reflect on how i feel currently. But when i am in front of the computer, i am lost.
Have you ever come across when you know that when you do something, you'll get hurt, but you still wanna do it? & through many attempts of doing something you know you'll get hurt & you know its not worth getting hurt becos of it, you tell yourself its nothing & start to act like you're so strong but actually inside your heart, you feel like shit? & just to make yourself feel better, you use methods like thinking of reasons just to make everything seems ok.
Hmm, that actually just happened to me. But i know that i cannot be affected by what i see becos its not worth it anymore. & i keep using reasons to make myself feel better & keep telling myself that it cannot affect me, its not worth it. Then i will come out with full of reasons just to make myself feel better which actually works. Its kinda tiring to do all this, but if this maintains something & don't make me feel so terrible, i think its worth it for MYSELF.
Its somehow cool that you are comforting yourself. :) Sometimes it really works much better than your friends comforting you. You may find it stupid to comfort yourself at times, you may find it so lonely when you comfort yourself at times, you may find it unloved when you comfort yourself at times, you may find it terrible to comfort yourself at times, but it somehow just works better than any other people.
Falling in love is easy, but letting go someone you fell in love with for years, its hard. Falling in love is not nice, but when you get to be with someone you love, the process of building the relationship is extremely nice & memorable. However, forgetting those memories are hard & painful.
Things are happening repeatedly everyday in my life, like going to school & study when i do not listen at all in class & just sleep on the table for hours. Going home, not knowing anything, how great can life be? :) Ha.

Sandra's star day.

2010-08-09T16:46:00.003+08:00

Hmm, yesterday was a fantastic day even though its kinda tiring. :) Had tuition from 1pm-3pm. One thing i hate about going out is to bother about what to wear. So since XingWen & Noreen was there, i tried out different clothes to ask them for their opinion. Hmm, for me, actually all the clothes i tried out wasn't very nice. But becos of the lack of time, i just wear the best outfit. Lol, cab down to siglap to fetch Tifflin, Amanda & Jolyn. Once they enter the cab, noise pollution ahhhhhhh! Haha. Amanda got so tired that she fall asleep on my shoulder & as for me, listen to song. :) Haha.
Cabbed down to Shenton Way anyways. Reached there quite early, so we took photos. Haha, yay!

Soon, the security asked us not to take photos. :/ So we left the place & go into the DBS Auditorium. Saw Sandra, ahhh! Everyone(US) is wanting to take photos with her. & i got the chance to take photo with her! Hahah. :)

Sandra look so pretty here. :D
The competition starts at 6, but Sandra is only singing at 7.45. So i got damn hungry, Jolyn accompanied me to Cheers to buy food. :) Was full at last! Hahah. Wander around before Sandra sing. Before Sandra sang, we visited her. She was kinda scared, everyone calmed her down. Soon, it's her turn to sing! :) Hahah, she sang very well! The judges are complimenting her! Hahah, good job Sandra!
After Sandra sang finish, its relax time before the top 6 are announed. :) Played like shit. Even had some piggyback race! Hahah, i piggybacked Jolyn. OMG, almost died!!! HAHAA! Then everyone lie on top of Meiyee! & something paiseh happened to me! Which is, i fall. Becos there's this little boy suddenly came out from the table, the table got table cloth, so i didnt see him. I trip over him & fall. PAISEH ONLY LA!!! OMG. HAHAHA! WAS QUITE FUNNY & FUN TOO ACTUALLY..?
Its time to announce Top 6! SANDRA GOT IN. OH YAY! Soon, the top 6 got to sing. Sandra sang not as good as the first song, but it was fabulous anyways! :) Hahaha. Then we took photos. Soon, announce results. Sandra got 5th.

I don't even think the one who got 1st deserve to.. :X Just becos he have loads of supporter. & i think Sandra should get into Top 3. Like, seriously la? Lol.
Afterwards, trained to Paya Lebar to eat Mac. :) Jolyn's father fetched me home. Slept at 2plus to wait for my Mac Donald food to digest! HAHA. End of story!

Saturday's tuition was kinda high for Kayxi & Noreen. I was kinda serious in the beginning becos CAs are here. & my A Math sucks now. I did not pay attention in class AT ALL, i know whats new. BUT YA? Got damn stressed during Math tuition. Then we got to know two new friends. Haha, not really knowing each other. But we laughed together. So yeah. Took pictures. :D

2010-08-09T14:14:00.002+08:00

I dreamed a dream in times gone by, when hope was high, & life worth living. I dreamed that love would never die, i dreamed that God would be forgiving. Then i was young & unafraid. & dreams were made and used and wasted. There was no ransom to be paid. No song unsang. No wine untasted. But the tigers come at night, with their voice soft as thunder. As they tear your hope apart, & they turn your dream to shame. & still i dream she'll come to me, that we'll live the years together. But there are dreams that cannot be, and there are storms we cannot weather. I had a dream my life would be, so different from this hell i'm living, so different now from what it seemed, now life has killed the dream i dreamed.

Dream is probably just a word. & we will have beautiful dreams, but we will also have ugly dreams that we hope that will never happen on ourselves. However, there are just some dreams that we have to dreams whether it is ugly or beautiful. So, we just have to face it, accept it & learn to let it go. :) It may be hard, but sometimes this is just the process of life that we have to undergo. Thats life.

Beautiful lies are just lies that makes us happy, until the lies have to come to the end, we'll get hurt badly. I really wonder on such issue, why can't the beautiful lies last forever so that we won't get hurt so badly? Why must we enjoy happiness then afterwards, sorrows? Thats why, some people are just too afraid to get too happy, becos afterwards, something real bad will happen & strike you down. Thats life.

Friendship are suppose to last forever. Yet, some friendships just have to come to the end. Why can't friendships last forever? Isn't that better than ending a friendship? However, people says, ending a friendship allows both party to be happier. I've never believed that statement, & i will never believe in that statement. Becos since we had fun in the past, we definitely STILL will have fun in the present. Cos everyone in our life, actually have the ability to bring joys & laughters into your life. Its just about the amount of happiness the party brings into your life. But even you think of this kind of reasons to shoot back to the statement of "Ending a friendship allows both party to be happier", the friendship will still have to come to the end becos the other party just WANTS to end it. (But why not just tell me the truth that, you don't want this friendship to continue?!) Thats life.

Obstacles is actually something good. However, some people just think that its bad becos it makes you undergo so much pains & tears that you're just so tired of everything & you want to die. But think about the good side, obstacles makes you become stronger mentally. & everyone's life there's obstacles which many people call it as "ups & downs". Even myself encounter ups & downs. But if that makes me stronger, why not just accept that i HAVE to encounter it & be someone much better even though i have to go through all those pains & tears that will make me tired? However, the thing is.. How to accept? Thats life.

There's many things happening in everyone's life. We can't expect a happy day one after another. Becos in this way, that would not be called as life. I'm sure God bring us into this world with a reason. :) So i guess WE have to accept things in our life & try to let go. Even you can't, you just HAVE to. & soon, it would be a habit.

Liife.

2010-08-07T22:30:00.003+08:00

Sometimes, i just really have to praise this word "emotional". Becos it just makes you go haywire. Not eating food for couple of days. Making you cry litres of tears. Making you not paying attention in class or talks. Making you not talk at all. Making you just lie on the bed the whole day. & all this, emotions are taking our happiness away, taking our lifes away. Sometimes i just wonder why emotions are just so powerful. & why must our life go through "emotions"? Why can't it just be removed away from our lifes? Isn't that better? It won't take over our lifes, it won't take away our happiness in our lifes.

Also, why is it so hard to maintain a friendship that had been through problems? Is this a sign of... The friendship is soon gonna be fading off soon? & we can never have back the friendship anymore?

Sometimes, just becos of something, we can sacrifice our time, our effort, ourselves. & when we do all this stuffs, at times, we want something good in return. Like, having our friendship back & be like how it was suppose to be at the beginning. However, at times, whatever we've did for something, it just cannot be back like last time. Everything just doesn't go your way. & not everything will go your way. This is life, probably?

I've been through a friendship. & this friend, is more than a friend. She's been through thick & thin with me. I share my stories with her everyday, be it sad or happy. & without fail, she always listens to it attentively. & even she run out of ideas to make me feel happy, she'll just sit there & let her presence be there just to make me feel that someone is there, caring for me. Or at times, she'll give me a long hug. Whatever she had done for me, I'll never forget. I guess, i take her for granted, i didn't treasure her & i just got damn unreasonable. Until one day, she couldn't take it, & we got into a fight. A big & bad fight we ever ever ever had. I know it was MY fault, thats why i kept apologising. 5days later, she said we're fine. But my instincts, doesn't feels like its fine. It feels that.. Something is not right. & almost every single day, i live in fear. Worrying about almost everything i do & her mood. My life was soon then, a disaster. I changed the part where i was very unreasonable. & now, i am halfway through it. & i just hope i can change. I read a storybook from a psychologist, the book named "Even Happier". There's this chapter called "Rituals". There's this sentence that made me feel proud about myself. "Lerning new tricks, introducing a new behaviour, replacing old habits is extremely hard. Most attemps at change, whether by individuals or organisations, fail." & i changed to someone who is more understanding in a way. I want my this friend to know, but she just couldn't feel anything about it. Everyday, when i see stuffs i dont like, i just have to pretend like nothing happened. & i really didn't want to lead a life this way, so one day i took up the courage to tell my this friend about it, hoping she would understand. However, she didn't want to understand at all. Just to maintain the friendship, i pretended nothing happened the next day. & still, i live the same every single day, hoping something will change. Recently, i just couldn't stand it anymore. There's this urge that makes me just want to say out everything! However still, i didn't! Becos i thought of the consequences, it won't be good.. AT ALL. Until 2days ago, i just said everything out into the face of my that friend. I got really agitated, & i cried when i just begin the talk. Afterwards, i calm down & felt really really better. But when i tell her all these, i would really want a REPLY from her. Tell me how she feel. But she just couldn't!!!! So when i tell her how i feel, its no difference with no telling. Today, finally she.. Told me how she feel. I got really sad. She told me probably, we can't be like how we was already. Wanted to cry so badly, but on the other hand, i don't wanna get hurt so badly once again & cry like shit again. So i just pushed back all my tears & continue leading my normal life. I don't know what will happen between her & me now. But i just really hope everything will be going smoothly.. & still hoping we can still be best friends & be like how we was last time... :)

National Day. :)

2010-08-06T22:32:00.003+08:00

Haha, today, kinda more different than the other usual school days. :) Any idea why is it so? Becos its National Day. Haha, i didn't wear red & white becos i find it quite troublesome opening my closet & stare at my clothes & think what to wear. Hmm, i think i did the right thing too. Becos today in school, there's quite a number of people got caught of wearing some other colours, like black(which is actually quite ok). Some of their dressing, was really ok. But i just dont know why do they have to make such a big fuss of it. Its like, wasting time, energy & effort. So, why not just let it be since the students have already came to school & wore what they've wore? Its like, so much better. But the school just want to use ways to destroy the fun when our friends with us. Those people who was punished had to stand at the back of the hall, like wtf? -.- Hmm, anyway, i shall just wear red & white when I'm in Secondary 5. Haha, last year in Katong Convent. (OH YAY MAN.)
I just find some teachers very bias in a way. That doesn't mean someone did something wrong once, that person is bad & you just wanna keep picking on that person that just did something wrong, once. Why must you just immediately sentence the person's death just becos of something in the past? If i am the person who got scolding from you, you know what, i just gonna talk back straight into your face. Becos you're just fucking bias. :) I don't care if i get suspend or whatever, becos i bet everyone in this world have their rights to do something right. & talking back isn't something bad, its just saying whats right. So Mrs Anne Leong, you might want to change the way you treat my friend, Sandra?
Erm, back to topic about National Day celebration. It wasn't that bad like last year since they got this fancy fan beginning of the year. This makes the hall 9223828932434034 times cooler. So that makes everyone in the hall more comfy. :) Looked at the performance, had flu(again!) which sucks. Haha, choir sat at the back. & was kinda high when the celebration just started. Kept screaming. Scremed for choir people, people i know & like. Hahahahahaha. :) Scream until i forgot that i have to sing later on! Throat was feeling a little discomfort already. Haha, but who cares? Its once in a year! :) SO LET'S JUST ENJOY THE MOMENTS~.
Finally, everything its over. & its time for choir to sing. So we stand, went up onto the stage. Hmm, guess what! All the songs in front, i don't even know how to sing. So i'm like standing on the stage thinking,"Why am i even here since i don't know how to sing?!!!!" Erm, correction, everyone don't know how to. ONLY ONE SENTENCE OF THE CHORUS. :D PATHETIC OR WHAT. Hahaha. :) So, Jolyn suggested that we shall go back to the hall. Yeah, we SHOULD. So i went down, went to Kayxi. Got damn high. Suppose to sing, but i ended up shouting to sing. Hahah, after that i know i gotta chill~ So, i sang properly. :) Hahaha, Kayxi & me was like swaying to the song. COOL COOL. Hold hands when the song "Where I Belong" start. Kayxi piggybacked me! Haha, so cool. I was jumping, & she said,"Come i piggyback you." Haha, without any hesitation, i just jumped onto her. Haha, when she sway, my leg sway too. & she jumped while piggyback-ing me! HAHAHAHA. Was so high at that moment. Jump until so sticky. Lol. :) End of celebration, went to parkway with Noreen. Then City Plaza to find my darling Joelle. Haha, omg, she cut her fringe. NOT USE TO IT!!!!! HAHAHA. Slept from 3plus to 6plus. SHIOK. & i think i slept too long without showering, & now i am having a major headache! KILL ME RIGHT NOW MAN.

Hmm, anyway, who would wear a red tee with a green army skirt? :) Cos if you do, your fashion sense really suck. Hahahahahahahaha. Oh, you asked me keep my comments to myself, then why are you still saying comments in your facebook? :D Come on, just stop everything alright? Becos this game, its starting to get a little boring! (: & get back part of your life, which is, stop destroying friendships. Cos girl, thats not a very good thing you know. You'll somehow get retribution one day. Fall FLAT on the ground, & your nose will bleed like freaking badly. & your nose will be flat that you need a plastic surgery. You know~. & you will lose your front teeth. :) & when you say "F", "S", "MOFO", there will be air coming out from your mouth, & that'll be awful. So, before all this retribution comes to you, stop whatever you're doing k? Be a good girl. Lol, bitch.

2010-08-04T23:24:00.006+08:00

Haha, Rae has been pestering me to update my poor deadly blog. So, since my mother is taking her own sweet time to take a shower or whatever she's doing in the toilet, i shall just spend the time blogging instead of studying. :) Haha, i am so clever at times. I have no idea why am i so clever. Kidding.
Anyway, today, Kayxi had netball. As i was having fever yesterday, she didnt want me to wait for her, she insisted me to go home & rest. So, i went home after Chinese structured lesson(which sucks), saw Joyce. Shouted,"WHERE'S RAE AH?!" & Rae appeared behind of Joyce. PAISEH OR WHAT SIA. Haha. xD Then talk a while, went home. When i reach home, i just felt like sleeping. However, when i close my eyes, it seems like it doesnt want to close. So, i did some boliao stuffs. Haha. & Noreen came my house. :) Yay, we studied Geog. Not a lot, but at least a little is better than nothing? :D Hahah, then around 5plus. We came out with this stupid last minute decision. WHICH IS TO MAKE CAKE. Haha, i on-ed my computer & check out for recipe. Guess what we baked?
TIRAMISU! Haha, went out to buy the ingredients & etc. Reach home, immediately make the cake. Haha, quite fun. Sister joined in too. :) Hahah, after doing it, we needa put in the fridge. So we wait. While waiting, we didnt study. (COOL OR WHAT ONLY.) Used the computer & took photos. :) Haha.

Immediately done taking with photos, Noreen & me rushed to the kitchen to look at our TIRAMISU. :D Haha, it's quite watery still. But we just took it out. :) Tried eating, quite nice. NOT BAD! HAHA, A PAT FOR OURSELVES.
Sister gonna bring one for her friend becos her friend want it. xD Hahah, i think tmrw i gonna sleep in class, AGAIN. Hmm, screwed myself up. Tmrw gonna stay back to look at Kayxi's rehersal. Hmm, quite interesting uh! I think she want me to look just becos she scared i cannot see on the actual day becos i think choir have to sing. Hahaha, & now, she got no one to look to now. SAD POOR GIRL. Hahahah! Alright, i shall go shower now!!!!!!! AHAHAHA.

2010-07-29T22:19:00.002+08:00

Hahaha, its been a thousand years i've touched this blog & even blog in it. :) Now, i am doing it! Becos when i open up, i feel so sad that i left it just like that & my memories is not piling up in this blog. :) But i gotta say Sec 3 is really damn busy. D: Totally no time.
Now, i'm rushing for my homeworks in front of the computer. I haven shower & i wanna sleep badly! :/ Hahah, anyway, i slept for 1h in chemistry class. See how tired i am!!!! :D Glad that Mr Lim did not wake me up man. Hahah.
Tmrw no CCA. Next week no CCA too. :) Hahah, shall take this oppurtunity to study if i can? Lol, i hope i can? Alright, shall end here for now cos i really need to complete my homework! BYE BLOG. :)

2010-03-19T20:54:00.002+08:00

Secondary 3 is a level which is harder to study than Secondary 1 & 2. & CAs, i know i've worked hard. Maybe for other subjects, i didn't. But for those subjects that i really worked hard, i failed, i dont blame myself or whatever. I know i've studied hard, but my mother don't.

She think i didn't study hard at all, & she expect me not to fail any subjects for the next exam. Hah, i wonder if i can or not. I don't think i can. Everybody know that Sec 3 is hard, but only my fucking bloody hell mother dont understand. -.- Which is damn fucking sucky.

I asked her to try studying Sec 3, hah, she bloody scold me like shit. -.- Cb. Sec 3 isn't as easy as what she think. She think as long as i pay attention in class, i study like twice or triple than others i will definitely stand out. PUI AH!
Fyi Karen Lye, i do pay attention in class, its just depends if the teacher know what are they teaching, do they teach well or not. They dont teach well, even the whole day i keep my bloody mouth shut, i will go home not knowing anything still you bloody hell fucking get this fucking thing right.
Lastly, even i study twice or triple than others, if others are just naturally smart, no matter how much i put in i may do well but i will not stand out. I will NEVER beat 306 people. So just get it. I bet if you study, hah! You study 10times than those you cannot even win me.

Ya, im stupid. Regretted giving birth to me?!!! Then sell me away. HAH! Go find a clever daughter that pleases you. Alright? That makes you happy also makes my happy. But please sell me to a mother who understands people well. :) Thank you. -.-

2010-03-12T20:57:00.002+08:00

March holidays are here, its time to have a one week break. (: However, i must not slack totally. I still have to buck with my studies!

Today is the Meet-the-Parent-Session. Haha, surprisingly, Mr Lim praise me. :D He say i bahave in class not bad lah. & i did quite well. & he compliment the whole class saying we have potential, better than the last year people. :D Not bad! *clap for myself!* Anyway, my class position drop tremendously! Omgggggggg.

Luckily mummy & daddy didn't scold me. Just say must work hard for next CA. & i will really want to do well & work hard for CA. & really hope i will not fail any subjects. :D So, i've planned my March Holiday timetable. (: Hope i will really follow it & do what i need to do. JAIME NG, JIAYOUUU!

Tomorrow have the talk about through train programme. Thinking of today is the last day of term one, i was so happy. But when i remember that i have to go school tmrw, i just feel like fainting. Hahah. I still thought of sleeping late. After the talk, going home. & going out at 3 with sister, Amanda, Tifflin & Kayxi. We're going for the Entertainment Award! Hahah, i bet it gonna be so crowded man! All of us must hold hands to walk! Lollol! Hope tmrw will be funnnnnnnnn. :D

Gonna go shopping with Tifflin on Monday. :D I wanna buy clothes, shoes, bags & accesseries! HAHAHA. O.M.G, i'm going whooolala. Hahah!

I think i got nothing else to talk. xD So toodoos!

2010-03-05T22:33:00.005+08:00

Hah, was blog hopping & found out almost everyone's blog is still alive, yet mine, so dead. So i've decided to blog since i have nothing much to do & i suddenly have the feeling to blog though i have nothing to blog about? Hahah. Maybe i shall blog about random stuffs & some past events that happened. which is Chinese New Year.

CAs are over. I totally just screwed my CA. The worse exams in my 2years plus of secondary school life. Ha. I wonder how am i gonna tell my parents. & this term, meet-the-parent-session is like complusory? Means even your parent can't make it or whatever, they'll just find a way to talk to our parents. & know what, its only for the NA pupils. How unfair. Actually not, because they have to talk about through train program. (: Anyway, i tell myself that i want to be in through train program. Means, can skip N Level? So i think i have to work extra hard than other students in Sec 3 express. D: *faints* Hmm, i shall list down my marks one by one though its ugly. :/
E Math-14/30(totally cried like shit cos i really studied like shit for E Math, & worse of all, i fail by 1 mark only. :( )
A Math-6/25(Pathetic uh? Not sad becos i know i didn't have the time to study for it.)
English(summary)-8/20 (Literally the whole class fail lah, thanks to Ms Nadira being so strict. But i think overall i pass.)
Chinese-25/50(My best subject since young, yet i get only 25, JUST. PASS.)
Core Lit-15/25(Quite disappointed cos i know i can do better if i know how to write it down & explain it like how i can just say it out.)

Combine Subjects

Biology-9/15(Surprised that i pass man.)
Chemistry-16/20(Can actually get full marks, but careless!)

Elective Geog-5 1/2(No feeling cos my teacher sucks. I just sleept throughout her lesson & fell asleep when studying before Geog exam.)

Social Studies-5/13 (Sad! Cos i really studied hard for SS. :/ I went crazy for SS.)

YEAH, this is my results. I bet my report book gonna have loads of underlining man! :( My parents is so gonna scold me & will say sarcasticly,"Your report book very nice uh! All line line line."
Then i gonna have nagging!!!!!! OMGGGGGGGGGGG. I don't want Sec 3 mannnnnnn. :/

Anyway, lets not think about the sad stuffs. Think about happy stuffs. Chinese New Year! :D I know its way too late to blog about it, but yah? I got nothing to say about! Cos every single day of my life is like the same already. Not like last year. Alright, Chinese New Year, i didn't go anywhere. Lol. Not that fun uh. Cos ALL my relatives is in Malaysia. :( & i gambled, lost $20. & i'm not like my other family members, even they lost, they still continue thinking they're still lucky that they can get back the money. I dont wanna lost my angpao moneyyyyy! Total money i have is over $600. Yeah man! Only the second day of New Year at night went out to take angpao which is only 2? Then went home. Sian lah. So i shall just post pictures to make this post look nice & complete. ;)

P/S Not all photos are uploaded. ;D

2010-02-26T21:25:00.002+08:00

Exams are over. Stress, not anymore. Nerd, not anymore. Happy, not at all! Got back 3papers already. I failed A Math. How much i gotttt. 6/25! So pathetic. ;/ Sigh.
I dont know what else to do. & this blog may be dead at times. So.. Yah. Bye.

2010-02-06T22:54:00.004+08:00

I freaking got 9/26 for Math Quiz! Its so hard! :( Im so worried for my studies now. Im worried for my studies, but im not doing nothing! :/ In class, i'm like talking rubbish. Doing rubbish. Or i sleep in class. Play in class. Reach home, learn nothing new! :/

Math suppose to be my best subject, but i think i just gonna flunk it. I do my math until i go crazy. My room is so messy just becos of math. I look for all the papers i wrote for math, studied for math, & crush papers for maths on the floor! LOOK!

Actually not very messy, but still!!!!!!!!!

The magazine is my sister read one. Not me!

& now, i have to pack my messy room. But i dont feel like packing it becos its just so... MESSY. :/

I'm going out tmrw with Kayxi, Hweeling & sister. We gonna cycle at 9am. (: Hahaha. Home tuition is cancelled becos Kathy got hospital appointment, However, at night got Mr Gan. :/ Sighhhh. Stresssssssssssssssssssssssss. D:

2010-02-05T21:26:00.002+08:00

HELLO! :D The past few days i'm having sore throat, cough & flu! Haha, & normally people will have a fever. But the mighty me, didn't get fever. :D

Anyway, my stupid laptop cannot use in a sudden. There's no connection when my house computer have connection & my sister's laptop have connection too. But mine, NO. We share the same connection, yet cannot connect. Definitely not the connection problem, its my freaking computer problem. :/ So piss! Was talking so happily with Kayxi, suddenly, cannot! Argh. From happy to piss!

& i dislike quite a number of teachers for this year. First one, Mr Lim! Second one, Ms Nadira! Haha, this two only. Mr Lim, why? Becos i talk also cannot. He expect the whole class not to talk for 1hour uh! Then he want to change my place, i don't wanna change my place!!! Sitting with Jolyn will have food, can talk & etc! & Mr Lim scolding, its not even scary. -.- Wthell. Mr Pang one also more scary sia. Mr Pang angry, i will definitely keep my mouth shut! Then he always release us late. Keep threatening people! IDIOTIC.

For Ms Nadira, she's like so irritating lah. -.- Wthell ttm. However, her lesson is quite fun cos the whole class will make her so freaking piss with us until she cannot stand it. There's loads of funny incident during class time with her. Hahah. Cos our class is so noisy, she's trying to go through our comprehension, but we keep talkingtalkingtalking, so she start saying,"Mr dear girls, stop disturbing my train of thoughts!"" LOL. Thats the phrase of her's now. If not before that was "My dear girls!" "Girls!" "Ms Nadira...." Hah. Then she also keep threatening us to release us late. Why is our co form & form teacher so alike!!!! :@
Then when Ms Nadira say she gonna take our time, Crista was like,"But according to Mrs Sng, you can't do that."Ms Nadira kept quiet.
Ms Nadira was talking talking talking, she started to "hello!" Jolene Seah said back,"Hi." LOLLOL. As for me, whenever in her class, i'll be talking to Jolyn like shit until she keep staring at us & say us. HAH! Ms Nadira is so damn inconsiderate. She keep giving us like uncountable homeworks when we have her lesson. Its so fucking irritating k. Idiot, we have plenty of homeworks now lah. Cb.

See how horrible this teachers are & how much we hate them. -.-

Oh, Ms Shieku ask me to say "I'm a lazy girl!" two times. Haha! & i started laughing badly.

Oh! I pass my flu, sore throat & cough to my sister. Teehee! :B

2010-01-31T16:22:00.002+08:00

I wanna fly up like the balloons to avoid stuffs.

Erm, i suddenly felt like blogging. So i stop doing my homework, press the blue button of my laptop, type my password, click on Internet Explorer, type blogger.com & click new post. & thats why i'm here blogging. HAHA. Alright, i'm so damn lame. xD

Actually, i have quite a number of stuffs that i want to do.
1) Do finish my mini summary for passage B.
2) Finsih draft summary for passage B.
3) Finish lit worksheet.
4) Study for Math test tomorrow.
5) Remove my cramps. D:
6) Paste the twitter code into my blog.
7) Start studying becos CAs are coming.
8) Have enough sleep.
9) Save money.
10) Go on diet again.
11) Tidy up my messy room.
12)Finish my NYAA booklet.
For now, thats what i want to do. For the studying for CAs, i always say i want to study. But when i open up my book, the first thing that always happen to me is, Y-A-W-N. Yawning will always happen to me when i open my books. Be it lit book, chem book, bio book & etc. I'll just yawn. Hah. But i gotta say, for Math i won't really yawn. Cos Math i have to do, so i will crack my small brain to think. Hahah. & as for Lit, Chem, Bio, English, you ask me to read, after 10minutes i will still be at the same sentence reading the same sentence again & again & again & again. Lol. -.- So i doubt i can ever start studying for my CAs. CAs cannot, Mid-Year worse. CA2 & EOY, hahaha, byebye man! I got a veryveryvery strong feeling that i will fail quite a number of subject for CA. I'm like prepared for it already. Lol.

Anyway, i'm damn in for facebook now. Not in for my facebook profiles or whatever. But with the games. -.- People have been playing facebook games like how many years ago. & when they tell me they play facebook games, i'm like, wthh. LAME. & now, the one who say LAME(ME) is playing Home Inn, FishVille & PetSociety. Ha ha ha. So cool rightttttt. All thanks to Eileen Ng, Agnes Lai(Joelle's mum) & Tracia Ong! Eileen Ng teach me to play FishVille. Agnes Lai teach me how to play Home Inn & Tracia Ong teach me how to play PetSociety. D: Omg.

& was so freaking pissed with my mother yesterday night. Yesterday i have to go to school. I come back, i have tuition at 3.30-5.30. At 9plus, i start using my computer, she scolded me saying that i keep using the computer never study at all! WALAO. I'm like WTF LAH. I said CB to her. OMGOSH. I'm going crazy one day. There's another matter that she piss me off, but i'm too lazy to blog about it cos i will only make me angry again. :@

Anw, yesterday the Media thingy is so super duper boring! Someone like me hate drawing ending up drawing for like 45minutes! Believe it or not. I almost fall asleep lah. -.- I swear i will never find something fun anymore!

ANW, MY CRAMP IS SO SUPER DUPER PAIN. AIYER!

Tomorrow maybe gonna go injection, not for h1n1 or whatever. Some personal reasons. THEN GONNA EXAMINE BLOOD. Hoho. I will have LOST OF BLOOD. Below come out blood, hand come out blood. WOW! I hope i just immediately faint when they take my blood. xD That will be so so so so so COOL! HAHAHAHA. But it may not be a must. I shall ask my mummy laterrrr. ;D

I have tuition later at 7.15pm. :( HURHURRRRRRRR. KILL ME MAN. I think thats all i gonna talk about. I wanna play my Home Inn already. BYE!

2010-01-29T20:12:00.003+08:00

HELLO PEOPLE. Have not been blogging this few days. :/ Kinda busy with school stuffs & birthday presents. Hah. & was so tired. Slept late every night, only until yesterday, i slept at 10.55pm. However, i'm still so freaking tired.

Tomorrow i have to go to school for some Media stuffs. A lot of people is not going, it sounded fun. So Amanda & me went. We're good students that do not lie to teachers we have this & that. Not like Noreen. xD The thing will be from 8-1? I have to go home, eat shower & have tuition which is at 3.30. Hahah! PEOPLE, please pity me man.

Anw, things this few days didn't go smoothy. Stuffs happen, but now, i cannot be bothered with it already. Wanna be friends with me or not, its up to you.

Today after school, went to see netball's tournament. Kept shouting. My voice is gone a little bit already. HAHAHAHAH.

I feel like eating durians. xD HAHA. Anw, i dont think i will be posting that much already. BYE!

2010-01-22T21:22:00.002+08:00

Today not a perfect day, also not a bad day. :D Lessons was alright. I didn't get tired cos maybe last night i slept earlier. :D
First lesson was E Math. Its quite alright, i didn't feel tired & restless. I kept doing questions. But on the other hand, i'm chiong-ing my homeworks that i didn't do yesterday cos i left it in school. Careless me. Lol. Mr Pang FINALLY start teaching Sec 3 E Math. & teach something i've learnt. So, i know how to do. :D Hee, & probably becos of that, i keep doing questions after questions.

Next is PC. Haha, kinda funnn. (: We have to write about our personal stuffs. I draw also. & my drawing is so awesome. Its like quite nice.. Hee. While writing, Amanda almost cry! HAHA. I laughed at her. I'm so heartless, righttttt. During PC, i'm chiong-ing my summary. HA HA HA. xD Everyone laughed at me cos i spelled free thinker as free twinkle. Then i even drew stars.

Recess time, was kinda hyper. I look like a retard. I can just suddenly laugh. LOL. SONIA LAUGHED AT ME THOUGHHH. :D Then i acted that i was angry when Amanda put milo into my peach tea when i haven drink finish yett!!! :/ I stand up pretend walk away. But i walk away got reason one! Hahah! I need to buy book! xD

MT, teacher sick ah? Then check if we did our homework. Let us hear song. Chinese damn relax de loh. LOVE IT MAN. Just hate the part when she ask us to copy the whole chapter. -.- & something damn funny happened. I was talking abt something cute, Jolyn said back,"Can't you see a cuter one behind you?" I pretend i vomit then everyone laughed like shit. SO THICKSKIN. But we know she's just kidding. & Jolene Seah said Zhang GuiHua very strict already. Strict in chinese is YAN. YAN in chinese is salt. So Jolene Seah ask her,"Must put more vinegar!" But its not suppose to, its pepper. She said black pepper in chinese as black sauce. LOL.

Then was......... Chemistry. Kinda piss lah. Cos Jolene Seah slept. I stared at her, she wake up turn to me say something. Then i smile, Mr Lim say,"I don't know what are you all smiling at. I don't wanna scold, cos there's no time for that." Wtf lah. next time i shall talk to him black face. -.- Smile also cannot. Not like when i smile, i not paying attention like that.

Bio, damn fun! I love it when Bio is at lab! Cos we can do a lot of experiment. Then can talk damn loud. Laugh damn loud. I showed, Gloria Ng, Leona & Jolyn my panty! They keep laughing. HAHAHAHA. :D

English, we piss Ms Nadira off. HAHA. & she pronounce Vitamins as Vi-Ta-min. HAHA. Cos previously we told her how to pronounce it already. Then she say wrongly again, she ask us how to say. The whole class say tgt,"VAI-TA-MIN!" Jolene Seah damn funny! Cos whole class quiet liao, then she say."What Vi-Ta-Min!" Ms Nadira suddenly burst out laughing. LOL. Everyone laughed like shit.

After school, sit bus 10 to TM. Said a lot of funny incidents & made Jolene damn high. She kept laughing. Jolene buy her stuffs, i buy her stuffs. But too much, my bag is damn heavy. The plasticbag damn heavy. ALMOST DIED!!!! 5plus left TM, i asked Jolene what the father work as,"Engineering. Teach people how to fly boat. HUH! Nonono! Fly plane!" We laughed like shitttttttt. xD

Go home, cousins, nieces, all there. Walaoooooooo. Then i think i PMS, i keep picking on Tracia. HAH. xD Anw, tmrw got tuition at 9.30a.m. KILL MEEEEE! D: Nothing to blog le, bye!

2010-01-21T22:12:00.002+08:00

Finally have the time to blog! Everyday is so tiring! Sec 3 is sooooooooo ARGH. I want Sec 2 man. Anw, the time now i use for blogging is actually suppose to do homework! BUT, i'm so smart that i forgot to bring back my summary paper! Resulting cannot do! Tmrw recess not gonna eat, do summary! & do my xi zhi! HA HA. Cos i dont have my textbook with me when i'm having chinese lesson, i didn't write down cos too lazy, i didn't highlight! SO, i don't know what words is for it. I'm so dead man! I never complete any homework! I just feel like lying down on the bed, close my eyes & wake up after 4days! I need a break. I hope i have a fever now so i don't have to go to school! CAN GET MC.

Anw, today choir, there's 20 new sec 1 members. Hmm, not bad. (: Choir today very tiring. & i'm so piss. -.- Shall not say it hereeeeeeeee.

After choir, went parkway with Kayxi. I went there just becos i want to eat the starbucks peppery Chicken Puff. Lol. Buy stuffs that we need & blah. Before going home, Kayxi ate Subway. :D Went home around 8plus. LOL.

I got nothing to blog. :S OH! Last Friday, Azida actually remembered to hug me! Was so happyyyyyyyyy. :D & when she hugged me, i want to cry. I miss her lah! 102 our chairman. Then go express, never really talk to her already. :( MISS HER LIKE SHITZXZXZX.

I shall stop blogging cos i'm thinking how am i gonna complete my homework tmrw... ARGH, hate this. -.-

2010-01-16T17:36:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIAOQING! My best friend for ever. :D Hahah.

Today, a very boring day. Use computer, do homework. Lol. & thats it! There absolutely nothing for me to do. :/ Tomorrow gonna have two tuition. First one at 3.30 to 5.30 which is with Noreen & Xingwen at my house. Second one is at 7.30 at Mr Gan's house. Hah, so tiring. PITY ME BAH. Nothing to say le. I'm thinking if i should pack my room not. Cos its in a mess.

2010-01-15T21:54:00.016+08:00

HELLO! :D Yesterday went to Science Centre. Not gonna talk about it much. Was quite okay. The body world is kinda cool. Sonia & me was so ammuse with the stamp. We went around looking for it. Hahah. After that, had lunch at Macs. I ate Mega MAc Spicy. Its really very MEGA. Very Spicy! & i didn't finish it. Too biggggg.

I keep burping after eating. Sonia, Amanda, Jolene & Noreen felt disgusted. & i almostt vomit when i burp. Lol. In Mac, we made a lot of noise. Laugh, shout, talk. Haha. Kinda cool ah.

After eating, take some photos & go into the Omni Theatre. (: The show is making me dizzy & felt like vomiting. Almost vomit, Noreen gave me a plasticbag. Lol. I slept for the whole show. :D Teehee.

2plus go back to school. & then go home. :D

Pictures.

Before leaving the school.

Haha, Amanda look funny. :D

Jolyn! (:

Lol. Tifflin took this photo when i'm taking photo with Jolyn.

Jolene, me & Sonia. :D

Waiting for Mrs Lim to buy the ticket.

Waiting for the Body World talkkkkk.

Noreen & Jolene. :D

Me eating Mega Mac Spicy!

Today
Ha ha, i saw something that i don't wish to see that made me cry immediately when i see that something. Thanks uh..
Today, had talks about YOG. & our school will be doing a country called Tuvalu. I've never heard before this country before. They showed videos of the YOG. The song so sad, make me cry even more. D: Lol, but i'll be fine.

Go back to class, Mr Lim assign who sing, dance & do the costume. I'm in singing with Amanda they all cos we don't want to do something we don't want so we volunteer first. :D The dance people & costume people is easy lah. But for singing people, we must think what lyrics, the tune. & the only one who is the main singing is me, Nadia, Deborah & Aisha(?). Amanda, Sonia, Jolene & Tifflin is the instument people. Hah. Didn't felt like doing, so keep going up & down with Noreen. Take this & that. Hah. Before going for recess, we do everything tgt. First attempt, second attempt & third attempt fail. But fourth attempt, we pass. :D Then we go for recess. Didn't have the mood to eat, so just look at my friends eat. Lol, something made me & Jolene quite argh during recess. Jolene & me have the same thinking. (:

After recess, wear our costume & do everything again. :D Then we take whole class photo. Performed. Lol, our's is like the worseeeee. Other classes one so much nicer. But we put in effort & we worked together. So, can be said as... SUCCESSFUL?

After school, find teacher for CIP. Gonna do to earn CIP. But one of it will be at CA week. D: Hope i can cope. Had lunch in school. Went home with Noreen after that. Joelle is at my house. Lol. Went out with Joelle & her mum to see furniture. Shared KFC. Go home, very tired. I fall asleep. Felt weak. Then go down to the swimming pool there to help sister take her photo for blogshop. She's openning blogshop, must support k! When its ready, i'll advertise for her. (: Haha. Cosuin help her take, i need to take care of Joelle. Which means, if she not be careful drop into the pool, i have to immediately jump in with my uniform. Hah, a very good job ahhhh. Go home eat dinner. Talked in msn. Something make me damn arghhhh!!!!!!

She is true, not you. You don't trust her, i trust her. Sucker.

Pictures.

2010-01-13T17:02:00.016+08:00

HELLO. Long time never blog. Now Sec 3, there's really no time to use the computer lah. Only until today, i come back early & i felt like blogging, thats why i'm blogging! Today went to CHIJMES. Actually, we're suppose to go for our camp. However, we didn't cos of the bomb thingy in Malaysia. So... The camp is postponed. (:

Heading to CHIJMES, i was kinda sleepy so i slept for like 6min & have to wake up already. Cos reach already. Before that didn't sleep becos i was busy playing Taptap. LOL. Tifflin bought 2 iPhones. Jolene one, i one. :B

Reach somewhere, my group(Jolene, Amanda, Noreen & Me) literally don't know anything. Hah, we're like a lost kid. People is busy filling up answers for the worksheet, but WE, talking. :S Cross over to CHIJMES. Teachers tell everyone what to do. & we have 1h free time. WOOOO. :D Not really free time lah, we have to complete the worksheet. But expected, our group won't do. We'll be talking, taking photos. HAHAH. Go one level up to don't know where cos Dianty & Victoria asked us to. Lol. Take photos. :D

:D

I look kinda retarded lah. xD
Went to the toilet. The toilet is creepy. You have to use all your force to push the door. Amanda, Noreen, Jolene & me got so scared so we went together. Noreen accompanied Amanda into the cuibicle. -.- When they're inside, Jolene take photo with ME!

Jolene & ME!

Out from toilet. :D
We use Tifflin's camera. But is.. Paraloid. Once you take, it will immediately come out. :D

Here it is! :D All i take one except the one & only half body taken by Sonia. I take one nice righttt!!! :D (I don't mean Sonia take not nice k!)

Afterwards, went down. A lot of people sitting at people's restuarant's table. So we sit too. I was kinda bored? So i went around asking people to take photo with me. Hee.

QinHui. :D

Tifflin. :D

Sonia. :D

XingWen. :D

Nadia. :D

Noreen. :D

June. :D

Jolene. :D
-I just find out, my photo with Amanda is not with meeeee.-
Went to the staircase to take photo with Tifflin. :D However, more & more people starting popping in. Actually they're those extras. Suddenly, we're like tgt. Hahah. People in photo. ;D

Doing worksheet.

XingWen. :D

Jolene. :D

Noreen, our photographer. :D (Xingwen is in this photo too!)

Noreen again. (Xingwen is behind AGAIN!)

XingWen. :D (Noreen's turn to be behind.)

ME! (Amanda is behind..)

Tifflin. :D

Sonia! :D
Credits to: JAIME NG JING WEN!
This photo not bad right!

Tifflin, Jolene, XingWen & ME! :D

Me & Noreen.

Me & Tifflin. :D

Tifflin! ;D

Little children are smiling! :D SAY CHEESE! xD (Make no sense.)

HAHA, we anyhow take de.

XingWen, Tifflin, Me, Sonia, Jolene & Amanda. :D

XingWen, Jolene, Me, Tifflin & Amanda. :D

XingWen, Jolene, Me & Tifflin. (:

Amanda, Jolene, Me & Tifflin. :D

Tifflin & Me. ;D But there's extra people behind! xD

Hugs makes people happy! (:

Anyhow take, but nice. (: Credits to: Noreen.

HEE!

Bleah! :P

Credits to: Tifflin Tan.

XingWen look very pretty here. :D

LOL. So nice lah this photo. xD

& thats all for photos. :D

Went back to school around 11plus. Go to Music Room. Teacher talk about CHIJMES. Everyone is so sleepy. & for me, i slept on my bag until the talk end. (: We were release at 12.50. :D Hahah. Anw, i'm all alone at home now. Lol. So boredddddd. xD Tomorrow going Science Centre! Hope it'll be funnn. BYE PEOPLE!

CCA FAIR.

2010-01-09T22:54:00.002+08:00

I'm so tired now! :( Everyday not enough sleep. Everyday so tired. Now i understand why some students in choir do not attend choir. Cos there's really too much to study & there's not enough time. :/ I hope i will have the time to study & also have the time to go for choir.

Wake up late today. Aiyah, luckily Noreen didn't reach the bus stop on time too. Go school, put on make up & change into choir costume. I'm somehow the model to let them see our choir costume. Of course, not only me alone. Still got some people.

Give out flyers with Sandra. I don't know how to. So Althea pulled me around to teach me, but i walked away. LOL. So loser. Was trying to avoid my friends to let them see me, but end up, all of them saw me. Ah, so paiseh. Saw Tifflin, ask her to lend me her iPhone. Hahah, i play her phone like crazy. But after a while, the game is making me damn pekcek, i give her back. HAHAHAHAHHA.

All Sec 1 go up to the hall, finally can stop being a model. Go up the gallery to look at all the performances. Hahah, i shall skip all other CCA. Our choir, beforehand, we've already planned what to do. First, we'll sing a veryvery serious song. & we'll purposely play a song to disturb our singing. Then, the instructor(Melenie) will act like what happen & say sorry. & the song, SORRY SORRY plays!!! :D & our choir dance! COOL RIGHT?!!!

Can look at the video in facebook but its in Ashely's profile. (:

After CCA Fair over, go parkway buy some stuffs. Go Kayxi's house. Yuxi is somehow bullying me by tickling me. D: AHH. Went home at 7plus.

NOW, doing Chemistry & Geog. SO HARD. :( BYE.

School starts, & i'm not happy at all.

2010-01-06T21:35:00.002+08:00

School reopen! Who's happy? The Sec 1 & Sec 2. Cos its not the year of suffering, still. If not, will they be happy? Lol. & yah, i'm saying i'm not happy when school reopen. Cos i feel the stress in Sec 3 already. I have no idea how to cope for 2 more years. Don't count Sec 5. Just afraid, not even Sec 5, i breakdown already. Every week, its so tiring! :(

Now, my days still okay. Hope will not add anything already. If not, its really like shit.
Monday: Nothing. (For now)
Tuesday: Tuition at night, 7.45pm. Reach home around 10plus.
Wednesday: Choir until 5pm.
Thursday: Choir until 6pm.
Friday: Nothing. (For now)
Saturday: Studyy.
Sunday: Study already, at night 7.30 got tuition.
Omgggggg. This like disaster for me already. If Monday & Friday also kena occupy by teachers or whatever, i can just dieeee!!!! :(

& there's a lot of books to bring you knowww! My bag is so heavy. Still have to hand carry some books. Everyone is getting a locker, but not me. Cos i scared when i have locker, i won't study at home.. So i shall just get use to my HEAVY bagggg. One day, everyone will become drawfs. :/

Sigh, i don't wanna continue anymore. Byeee. ;(

2010-01-02T17:48:00.002+08:00

Hello hello hello! :D School is starting in 2 more days! Or maybe, 1 and a half day. & today, i only do finish one english homework. Which is damn simple. Movie review. Hahahah. After doing that, i wanted to do my chinese compo, i don't know is it i got no mood to do or long time never think about studies, rusty already. Lol. I think both lah. & i've decided to do maybe tomorrow. Or maybe later? I don't know. Just let it be. See when i want to. Just cannot over when school reopen that week. :D

Today, not really a fabulous day. However, still can live with it. (: Today somehow unlucky lah. Come menses. :X I thought it will come when school reopen cos last month it was 4th. But also can count as lucky come today, at least when school reopen, not pain. Tracia & her mother come at 2plus. Joelle suppose to come. But poor her, she suddenly have fever. She's weak now i think. Have fever 3times in a month. But now they say they still coming later on. So hope she's better by then. :]

Too bored, went out to buy stuffs with Tracia when there's not even a need to. Go buy stuffs. & i don't know why i'm so nice to her. Its like even she do things i usually get angry on, i won't get angry with her today. Lol. Then i ask her what she want. What she want i buy. Lol. We even buy ice-cream randomly. We played with perfume. Coming home, not smelling smelly, but smelling very nice. Total we buy, $45 loh. Lol.

I ask Tracia help me carry. But of course, the lighter oneee.

Joelle is here now. She smell of vomit, i don't know why. Yesterday she vomited. Lol. Anyway, Tracia's mother's stomach is so biggggggggg. She's very random. She come in, close the door,"Jaime!" She lift up her dress let me see. I was like, OMG! So bigggggg!!!! Only 7months leh. If New Year, will be even bigger. I can't wait for it to come out so i can carry ittt. :D

I'm so bored now. Anyway, one night i was talking to Amanda. & i make her hyper! :D Look at her pm. Teehee. :D

Joelle just come & open the door to call me. LOL. So cute lah when she do that. Hahah. :D

Tmrw i got tuition at 9.30a.m. Tonight must sleep earlier already. ;( Hurhur. Afterwards going to remove my extension with Jolene. Then she accompany me go parkway to buy school stuffs. :D

Joelle's father told Joelle's mum to off the fan. Scared Joelle cold. But never even blow at Joelle. Joelle mother replied,"You crazy ah?! Never even blow at her!" I keep laughing laughing. Joelle's father come into my room & make me. Stupid lah. xD

Alright, nothing to blog already. Byeee. ;D

2010-01-01T23:19:00.003+08:00

HELLO PEOPLE! :D I’m back from HongKong. Its very cold there cos it rained. Its 9-14 degrees there. The trip was alright. Not fabulous, however, still acceptable. But, when I know I’m going back to Singapore soon in the airport in HongKong, I’m so happy. Alright, let me start about the 5days 4nights in HongKong. :D

25/12

Woke up at 5.10a.m. Very tired becos I slept at 2plus. I keep reminding my sister to eat her medicine cos I don’t want her to vomit. Lol. Then prepared everything, head to airport. Check-in first. Eat our breakfast in starbucks. Lol. Eat finish, gonna go in the gate. Before going in got body check & bag check. One of our baggage have shower stuffs. & my mother don’t know that no liquids are allowed in the bag so she put in. Over 100ml must throw. My daddy’s facial foam have to be thrown. It costs $30plus. My father somehow scold my mother. My mother can never be clever. -.-

In the plane, my sister open the vomit bag first. This time I very kind, I gave her mine too. LOL. The point is I don’t want her to vomit at all lah. When the plane depart Singapore, my sister didn’t felt like vomitting. But me. LOL. I almost vomitted, don’t know why. But yah. Sister slept all the way. Only when eating time wake up. For me, after I eat, I sleep. This is called PIG! :D WOOHOO.

Arrival in HongKong at 12 noon. (: Walao, wait damn long just to stamp our passport. Collect our luggage, meet our tour leader. He breif us about some events that we gonna follow tour. & ask us if we wanna go Disneyland or whatever not. If want, then need to buy the tickets. After explaining everything, we left the airport & they bring us to our hotel.

Our hotel is called L Nina Hotel. A 5 star hotel. (: Go in the room, kinda big leh. Not as big as melbourne’s one. However, its nice lah. The toilet its transparent de. But got curtain to close it. Nice nice nice. I took the hotel rooms. As well as my parent’s one.
Parents.

Mine.

Then we eat our lunch nearby our hotel. Cos our hotel have a shopping mall nearby. (: So we eat there, the food there, quite nice lah. :D Go back to hotel, I change my jacket cos gonna be cold, then go down to the lobby wait for tour leader.

I don’t really what happened. I only remember, 6plus we ate dinner. After eating, we went to the peak of the mountain. However, before that, went to a wax shop. (: It’s a shop that they make those actors, singers, boxer & etc. Then can take photo with it. However, only Jackie Chan one people help us take. & of course, we’ll buyyy. LOL. (not gonna write the name of who I take with cos some I don’t know who I also take. Haha.)

& we’re too engrossed with it, we forget that our time includes going to the peak. So we faster chiong & its damn windy. We told the tour leader, she say she wait for us. Someone help us take photo, buy & leave the place. I remember we went somewhere, but forget already. Then those who want to go to the ladies street go. We go loh. Only WE go. Everyone tired already. & I’m tired too. I don’t have the mood to shop at all. So I didn’t talk & have the mood to shop for like 3hours. Hah. When going hotel, I damn happy. In the taxi I fall asleep. Slept at 2plus.

26/12
Rise & Shine! Woke up at 6a.m. I have a job to do every morning. Which is to wake my sister. -.- Wth lah. She can never wake up without anyone waking her up. Stupid lah. Dress up, wear longlong cos scared will be cold.

7.15a.m. meet at lobby. Check out becos going Macau, however its at 4a.m. Tour leader bring us to bus & leave. & our tour leader damn funny de. &s she’s nice. I miss her. :X Order our drinks first for the restaurant for breaskfast. So when we reach there, no need to wait liao. So we got down the bus first & take photos.

After that, head to the restaurant to eat. The food quite nice. Haha. Eat finish, go to another mountain peak. But not that high. & there’s a lot of thief there. So I sling my bag over me & I look damn retarded whenever I do that. HAHA. Took photos & left.

Went to temple. & there’s a lot of thief there too. It’s a group of them some more. Walao. Make me damn scared loh. My mother damn enthu about going temple de. Lol.

After that, go toilet. I kena scolded after mother came out from toilet. Becos the queue very long. My mother very slow de. She wash her hand before she go toilet. So she wash. Wash finish, she stand in front of sister & me. I told my sister,”Mummy cut queee.” Sister kept quiet. Then I told my mother. She also keep quiet. She came out, she told my father this:
Mother: Walao leh! Jaime keep saying I cut-queeu. Don’t know how to think de leh. Make me paiseh. Keep saying I cut, I cut I cut.
*turned back*
Jaime: PLEASE HOR, I SAY ONLY 1 TIME TO YOU. NOT THREE TIMES. 1 TIME ONLY, 1 TIME ONLY 1 TIME ONLY!!!!
Since she say I cut times. I said back 1 time only 3times.
Damn piss lah. Then my father helped her lah. CB. Damn piss.

Go to sit boat around to see. Damn cold siaaaaa. The wind damn strong.

After that, go to see necklance. Fengshui one. Quite nice. I want, but daddy say its too expensive. Don’t buy. So no choice. Cannot buy. Even my mother want also cannot. Lol.

After seeing necklance, went to a medicine shop. & they say the doctor very good one. The tour tell me, tell them nothing, they tell you something. Lol. Waiting for sister & my turn, we were so scared that there will be something wrong with us. Haha. The doctor very funny one, once he check our heartbeat, he will comfirm stick out his tongue. I told my sister & we laughed. Finally my turn, hahaha. His so clever, he know that I don’t breathe properly. He say if I not enough air, I’ll get dizzy & if this continues, I’ll keep fainting. Hah. For my sister, her gastric very bad. Both of us cannot eat fried things & drink soft drinks. If not my sister’s gastic there will get even worse. For me, my breathing will get worse. Will stuck or somethingggg. :S Now, father keep scolding me for drinking soft drinks, eating fried food. -.- Sister & me are going check-up. SIGH.

Then eat lunch. Wait for the bus. However, the upper deck is open de. Walao, when it moves, your hair is like messy. & it feels like its like your hair dropping out. Hah. Blow until my hair messy lohhhh. xD
Got wind.

No wind.

Got even worse one. But is videoooo. Shall post up in facebook. Haha.

Reach the place where the ferry is. Left our tour leaders. ): So sad. & they scold people just becos of us. Lol. In the ferry, veryvery rocky. I feel kinda dizzyyy. So immediately sleep. Reach Macau, we go hotel & then sit Shuttle bus to Venetian hotel. Venetian hotel is so niceeeee. :D & we saw the shop that boys over flower went to buy the mask & the place where Jandi & Junpyo meet. The sky on top is fake one, but it looks very real. Hahah.

The toilet.

11plus, left the place & go back to our hotel. Pack our stuffs & sleep.

27/12
Rise & Shine.
Woke up late. OMG! D: Suppose to wake up at 8a.m.(I did, however fall asleep back) Ending up, waking up at 8.46a.m. I jump up & shower. Wake sis up. 9.30a.m, eat breakfast.

10a.m meet the tour leader at lobby. Outside very cold! I expected it to be cold already, but I just wear like 1 clothes & 1 jacket(thin). However, I brought another jackettttt. :D

Went to the temple. My mother was so enthu about it. :S She ran.

Next, went to a shop that sells soup stuffs. Parents interesting, not me. I was somehow falling asleep already. -.- They buy all those things to make soup for us. I don’t even like. I drink liao also pekcek ah.

Went to a shop that sells Macau biscuit & sweets. Buy some stuffs, go liao.

Go a church, but the church is only a wall. LOL.

Buy some food while walking around. There’s a lot of shop there. Had 1h to shop around, once again, not in the mood. So just walk around. Went to a shop tht sell bags, three storeys. Bought a purse. The bag, don’t suits me. Soon, 1h pass. Meet tour leader. Haldway, rain! Damn cold.

Lunch time, eat buffet. Becos just eat, I never eat. My parents & sister eat. Then something funny happen.
Daddy: Eileen, behind is what ah?
*sister turn back & look*
Eileen: OH. Seats!
-.-
My dad meant the food, what is it. HAHAHAHHAA. Eat finish, went down early. ITS DAMN COLD. The wind is damn strong. Its 11 degree, couldn’t stand it. Get up the bus, proceed to Macau Tower. There, even colder. Went to 58^th floor, take some photos.

The floor got glass, she hold the pole & walk. -.- Wthell. What so scary. Ate ice-cream. Their ice-cream very nice, Go up to 61th floor. Walao, damn cold loh I swear! The wind damn strong. Raining some more. No one play the Bungy jump & more adventure stuffs. Only one person did. Which is from my tour griup the father. He do sky walk.

So cool. If you complete the skywalk, got cert & t-shirt. Write that you walk on the sky which is don’t know how tall. Left Macau tower & go sit ferry back to HK.

The wave damn big. The rain became heavier. Its like washing the ferry. Sit the ferry=Roller Coaster. Keep going up & down. My heart keep flying. No seasick people will sure vomit loh(include me). But I clever, I sleep. LOL. Oh, & I sit with a stranger. Then he want to eat meat. The wife pass to him, he drop & drop it on my shoe. HAHA. The wife laugh & he say sorry sorry! I also want to laugh. I tell my sister, we kept laughinh non-stop.

Arrive in HK. Go back our hotel. BUT, a new room. Same hotel. The room is small. :/ Unfair. Agter eat dinner in our hotel, sleep! We slept at 10pm. TIRED!!!!

28/12/2009
Its Disneyland dayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! :D I don’t think I have much to say about it cos pictures will do the talking. (: Went to disneyland at 10plus. Its cold. Colder than other days. Take like 10minute to walk in.

The tickets. ;D

Can see mickey on the whale? :D Haha.

Go in, saw Mickey Mouse! Still have to queue up to take photos with them. The queue for Mickey Mouse veryvery long. Saw Pluto & Goffy, we decide to take with them first. They very cute loh. When its our turn, Pluto & Goffy gang up to make me. They use their whiskers to make my face. LOL. After that, Pluto kiss me. xD He hold my shoulder, push me down a little & kiss me. I screamed. Hahah.

Eat breakfast.

It looks nice, but its awful! I didn’t eat mine at all. My sister & parents all so nice. Mine, like shit. Eeeeee. Then sister give me some of her pasta cos a lot. Eat her’s full already. Eat finish, walk around.

Saw Belle. :D Take photo with her. She very gentle loh. & now she’s belle. But once, she’s cinderella. Hah.

Went to toilet. Then went to watch show.

Waiting for mother. Hah.
Called Philhar Magic. Its all the disney character show. They give us a specs some more. The show is damn nice & all the effects are wonderful. When its on air, the theatre will have air come out. Water, will have water. Then if you wear the specs, its like coming to you then like can touch them(imaginary). DAMN NICE LAH. :D

This girl so cute. LOL. The parents say thank you to me when I take.

Walk walk walk, saw people from Pirates from the Caribbean(?). Ask them if we could take photo with them. Haha. They looks scaryyyyy. D:

We anyhow walk, then just nice there’s like a concert on the road. Chip, Dale, Mermaid, Cinderella, Mickey, Minnie, Mermaid, Snow White, Belle, Donald Duck, Pluto, Goffy, Woody & many more all there sitting on differents car dancing. There’s dancers accompanying them too! (:

They extend their legs.

Watch finish, parents want to watch shows. So we look at the map, see where to go. Went to Space Mountain. We thought that’s show. However, we find out its roller coaster. Father & mother walked out. Sister & I play. The way they say the game like very scary. Then make sister & me so scared. At that time, we want to pee loh. But we bear with it. When its our turn, I was so scared. Cos they say very dark, sudden turn & suddenly rush down. So when I saw the raod like going up, normally sure go down de what. But it didn’t. I screamed for nothing. All the way of the ride, I’m screaming. Just that one part really suddenly rush down. After the ride, I felt so dizzy. My sister say I useless. But she didn’t realise when she playing, she keep WOOOOOOO. LOL. Our photo look horrible. D:

Next, went to indoor for a moment. Its called the Small World. :D They play the song. Haha. The queue very long but very fast. Its like sitting boat, then go inside look at things. Quite beautiful. :D

Long not?

Next, we go to the Stich Encounter. Its so cool. Its like, the stich can talk to you. Whatever you say, his reaction & respond is just like human being respond to something. Hahaha. Cool. :D & its damn funny. Hahaha.

Walked around looking at stuffs. Take photos.

Stop at shop to buy some stuffs. I bought the minnir mouse hairband! HAHA. My parents & sister keep laughing at me. They say I’m retarded. Sister bought clips. Stich’s ear. Hahaha.

While walking to Tarzan Treehouse, saw this.

Next, go to Tarzan Treehouse. :D Thought it was damn nice. But its just like… keep climbing up. -.- Hah. Quite ok lah. Also quite boring. :S LOL.

So gay loh my dad.
Mother go toilet, she go for damn long. Its like 10min already. I went in tell her we very cold, can she hurry up. She come out from the toilet, she fucking scold me. -.- Wthell lah. Its not even my fault. She say even never wait, walk around still cold right. At least we’re walking. Not standing! I told her, then she say the same k! Wthell. Whats with her. I don’t think I can ever get along with her. -.- Asshole.

Next, saw Chip & Dale. :D Take photo with them. They very cute. They bang their butts & keep dancing. Act cool.

We also took photos with the elves. :D

9pm fireworks, so while waiting, we go to shops to see what they selling. Go to a jewerally shop. Want a bracklet, but daddy don’t allow me to buy. L I wantttt. Its so nice. Got mickey head hanging on it..

Then go to crystal shop. See how they do the crystal. Quite cool leh!

We decided to eat some stuffs. Eateateat, pay money. 5 more minutes to 9! We take out so called our specs. Cos if you put that on, it will turn out to be like snowflakes. Damn nice loh. ;D While waiting, take some photos.

They annouce. Slowly the light on the shops off, the fireworks start. Its damn nice. But I didn’t really keep seeing the fireworks through ther specs. Cos I keep taking photos. :/

Through the specs.

Nice right?

Snow.

Sit our bus back to hotel. I wore scarf cos its too cold. Went Mong Kok. We ate there. The food there, not bad lah. :) Walked around. I saw one leather bag! I want! But its 590! L Daddy say very ex, don’t buy. Sigh. Bought Juicy’s jacket & wallet. Soon, go back hotel.

29/12
Woke up at 10. Hahah. Cos its free & easy. Before 12 must check-out. So we slowly loh. Sqeeuze everything into our luggage. Our luggage is like, wowwww. POMP.

Eat somewhere near our hotel. We damn greedy, ordered a lot of food. Ending up, we didn’t finish up all. LOL. Suddenly rain, we don’t know what to do. Cos we plan to go somewhere(I don’t know where). But rain cannot. So we ask the taxi driver. He bring us to shopping centre. Walk around. Want to buy, but all too expensive. Go to a shop which sell bags & shoes. I saw a bag I like. Daddy buy it for me. Mummy buy boots. :S She say after HK, she in love with boots. Go Sasa to buy my nail clipper. My nails break. Share Mac with sister. Soon, must go back to hotel.

Sit bus & go airport. Get down the bus very cold sia. Check in. & blah loh. In the plane, sat with my sister & someone from our tour group. When we go hk, they sat in front of us. Hahah. & we talked to the son. Damn funny loh. We guess each other’s name. The mother & father very funny de. Like teenager like that. The son fall down the mother laugh de. Not like my mother, scold. -.- Sleep for a while in the plane. Reach Singapore at 12plus. That’s all for my HK trip. :D

Anyway, 2010 is here! :D Happy New Year everyoneeeeeeeeee! I countdown in Kayxi’s house. Means, I stayed at her house until like 1. The father fetch me home. But half of the day I was sleeping. Cos very sleepy. & I feel so loved. Cos Kayxi & Yuxi is snatching for me. Lol. They ended up fighting. HAHA. Yuxi shit on her undieee. :S Hahah.

Today, go out with cousin to buy school shoe. :D Cousin buy Aino. I wanttttttttt!!! I want daddy to buy that for me now. Not iPhone. Aino can watch tv & a lot of stuffs tooo!! I WANTTTTT. Anyway, school is starting in 2 more days. I never even do my homework. HAH. GOD BLESS ME! BYE PEOPLE!

2009-12-24T18:37:00.004+08:00

Ah, stupid. I'm so fucking piss with my idiot mother. Its our luggage, she care so much what. The clothes we gonna wear to HongKong is dirty, also not she wear. WTF LAH. -.- Touch the outside luggage a little bit also cannot. Dirty dirty dirty. In the world, everyone at least will have some bacteria lah. Mother come in, saw & say,
Mother: Put the scarf down.
Jaime: for?
Mother: Later when you open the luggage will drop, very slippery. Then later dirty!
Jaime: But the another half is my space.
Mother: Just put down!
Jaime: Wait lah! Now i putting clothes you want me to put one scarf which is mine down! Jiejie want to wear it almost everyday leh!
Mother: NVM! PUT!!
Jaime: I'M PUTTING MY CLOTHES NOW!
Mother: I KNOW. PUT DOWN.
Jaime: Later jiejie very hard to take!
*put dowm*

Jaime: LIKE THAT MEH?!
Mother: YAH!
*take out the scarf put on bed*
Jaime: LATER I THEN PUT LAH.
Mother: WALAO LEH! Ask you do this you go do that! Always oppose(?) with me!
Jaime: I'm not opposing you, I'M EXPLAINING!
Mother: Always talk to you, your attitude very bad one leh!
Jaime: EVEN MY ATTITUDE GOOD, WHEN YOU PMS, YOUR ATTITUDE TO ME IS BAD. SO WHATS THE POINT?!!!
*mother walk away*

I'm complaining to my sister now through sms though we're just next door. HAH. My sister help me. :D HAHAHA.

& my sister say she scared she will vomit in the plane! AHHHH. She better not, cos i'll vomit too. YUCKS. I don't feel like HongKong nowwwwwww. :S HAH.

I just pack finish my stuffs. Sister & i are still bringing sleeveless clothes even though we know it gonna be cold there. Mother & Father keep saying about us, but we didn't bother.

I'm so bored now. LOL. I JUST FORGOT MY PET SOCIETY FOOD IS DONE! AH SHIT~! My food is burnt.. :( HURHUR. Nvm, byebye!!! :D

2009-12-23T17:47:00.001+08:00

No one is at home now. Mummy & sister went out for facial & they gonna do their nails just becos they’re going HongKong. We’re going HongKong to look at HongKong, walk around. However, they like gonna see their boyfriends like that. Mummy kept asking me to go, but I don’t want becos facial very pain. & I’m not used to going so high class facial places becos I don’t always go there to wash my face. Hah.

Hmm, this few days I’m unable to sleep well. Becos people keep disturbing my sleep. 2days ago, cousin disturb my sleep by taking my handphone & I immediately woke up. I took so long to fall asleep, yet he come & disturb my sleep. :/ So I have a hard time sleeping back after he disturb me.

Yesterday night, I have a hard time to sleep too. Finally, fall asleep, this time round, sister disturb my sleep. She keep opening & closing my door room. & she don’t close the door properly. Then I have to keep waking up to close back the door. My sister had food poisoning. LOL. She kept vomiting & going into the toilet to do her business. After being disturbed, hearing her vomit make me feel like vomitting too. Its so disgussting. 6am, sister cannot stand it, mummy brought sister to doctor. LOL. Sister have a jab on her butt! & she’s complaining to me how pain is it before she go out.

Should I go the powerpoint slide for English homework? Cos now I really have nothing to do. L Its kinda boring. Maybe after blogging I shall go do. J

Btw, I have photos that haven been uploaded. 4photos in Malaysia. Post without photos looks a bit boring. So I shall post it up. :D

I think that’s all. :D Bye.